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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24075319">Earth's Weaknesses: Part Three</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaitingForMyHogwartsLetter/pseuds/WaitingForMyHogwartsLetter'>WaitingForMyHogwartsLetter</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Earth's Weaknesses: The 100 [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The 100 (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Artificial Intelligence, Bisexual Female Character, Canon Compliant, Epic Friendship, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Injury, Original Character(s), Original Character-centric, Slow Burn, The 100 (TV) Season 3, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Unresolved Sexual Tension, badass as all hell, basically a slow-burn of bellamy blake x oc, murphy x oc BROTP</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 20:34:12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>44,081</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24075319</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/WaitingForMyHogwartsLetter/pseuds/WaitingForMyHogwartsLetter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Part 3 of 7</p><p>Set during season 3 of The 100. After Mount Weather, Alyssa is finally able to relax a little. Although... it definitely isn't her strong suit. As they try to keep peace with the Grounders, and build something lasting-- a home-- Clarke is still nowhere to be found. </p><p>For once, everything seems as if it's going to be okay. And then... it isn't.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Bellamy Blake/Original Female Character(s), Octavia Blake/Lincoln</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Earth's Weaknesses: The 100 [3]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1722190</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>14</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. We've Come A Long Way Since "Princess"</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I applauded as Bellamy came out of the door. I had barely been waiting two minutes for them to finish, but had managed to catch the tail end of the fight. “Lincoln kick your ass again?” </p><p>“No,” he rolled his eyes, “Are you ready to leave for sector seven?”</p><p>“Blake, I was watching— he <em> definitely </em> kicked your ass again.” </p><p>He laughed, “Like you could do any better, you’ve barely been to any of the training sessions.” </p><p>“I could probably take <em> you </em> down if I wanted to, but Lincoln’s built like a freakin’ <em> tank.</em>” </p><p>Bellamy laughed again, grabbing his jacket and walking through the doors as they opened. “Monty, why aren’t you ready?” </p><p>Monty sighed, “I am. He’s not.” He jerked a thumb in the direction of the table, and my eyes landed on Jasper as he lay flat on his back underneath it, drunk. “What should we do?” </p><p>“We should leave him this time,” Bellamy decided.</p><p>Jasper took Maya’s death pretty hard, and he slipped into a deep depression after she died. He got through his grief using her MP3, and a whole lot of alcohol, which wasn’t really getting him <em> through </em> it as such, but it was getting him through each day. </p><p>“He’s not getting better, Maya’s death broke him,” Monty whispered. </p><p>I nodded, “He needs this,” before making my way over to him and pulling him out from under the table. “Let’s go.” The boys each grabbed an arm to load him into the rover. Once Jasper was safely stowed in the passenger seat, I walked over to where Astrid was working and sat down on her desk. “I’m going to sector seven with the others, wish me luck.” I planted a kiss on the top of her head and jumped down, waiting as Bellamy kissed goodbye to Gina. </p><p>After he was done, Bellamy slammed a bag down onto the front of the rover with a clang, dividing out the weapons inside it. A muffled voice shouted as Raven swung out from underneath, “Hey! Take it easy!” </p><p>“Good morning to you too,” I laughed. </p><p>Miller walked in, grabbing a gun of his own. “What’s the point if we can’t shoot them?”</p><p>“We can,” I reminded him, “Just not to kill.”</p><p>“That goes for everyone,” Bellamy reminded the rest of the group. “Has anyone seen Octavia?”</p><p>“We’re going outside the wall, you honestly think she’d miss that?” Miller raised an eyebrow as he pulled his jacket on. </p><p>There was a splash behind me and I turned around, narrowly missing getting hit as Monty threw a bucket of water over a somehow-out-of-the-rover Jasper. “Sorry, was that too cold?” <em> Ouch. </em> Jasper grabbed him in anger, throwing his best friend up against the rover before backing away slowly once he realised what had happened. </p><p>Bellamy stepped in, “No gun for you, not until you’re sober.” </p><p>“Don’t want one,” Jasper raised his hand in a mock salute and hit Bellamy’s face with it. </p><p>“Let’s get going already,” I called out, climbing into the rover. Bellamy gave Gina one last kiss goodbye before climbing in the back next to me. </p><p>Raven laughed from the front seat, “She’s too good for you.” </p><p>He scowled at her in return, “Shut up.” </p><p>“Careful, Monty might melt her,” Jasper spat angrily. </p><p>“Enough,” I groaned. “Raven, take us out.” </p><p>She nodded and started the engine, the doors of the garage opening slowly to reveal Octavia on horseback. “Try to keep up!” She called before setting off ahead of us. I laughed as we followed her out. The gates of <em> Arkadia </em> closing slowly behind us. </p><p>I could hear Jasper’s music through his earphones, especially as he began to sing along. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>But the day </em>
</p><p>
  <em> After today… </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Monty leaned forwards and pulled the earbuds out, “No way. If you’re gonna ride shotgun, you can’t just disappear."</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I will stop…</em>
</p><p> </p><p>Jasper plugged the MP3 into the rover’s speaker. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> And I will start… </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> Add It Up </em> began to play through the speakers as the guitar kicked in and the song sped up. Jasper sang along, and it was a song I was used to hearing him sing, along with <em> I Don’t Like Mondays</em>, because they used to be some of Maya’s favourite songs. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Why can’t I get just one kiss? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Why can’t I get just one kiss? </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Maybe some things I wouldn’t miss </em>
</p><p>
  <em> But I look at your pants and, I need a kiss </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Raven joined in and I couldn’t help but laugh as soon everyone in the rover was joining in with Jasper’s music, Raven’s necklace dangling from the rearview mirror and bumping along in time with the tunes. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Why can’t I get just one screw </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Why can’t I get just one screw </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Believe me I know what to do </em>
</p><p>
  <em> But something won’t let me make love to you </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Bellamy let his head hang low as he tried not to laugh as Miller sang to Monty jokingly, making all of us in the back join in even if we weren’t already. Although, the only person who hadn’t joined in yet at this point was Bellamy, because he was too busy laughing, but I nudged him and with a sigh he joined in too, grinning. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Day after day </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I get angry </em>
</p><p>
  <em> And I will say </em>
</p><p>
  <em> That the day is in my sight </em>
</p><p>
  <em> When I take a bow to say good night </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Don’t shoot, shoot, shoot that thing at me </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Don’t shoot, shoot, shoot that thing at me </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Jasper climbed into the back through the gap between the front seats and stuck his head out through the ceiling, singing as loud as it was probably humanly possible. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> You know you got my sympathy </em>
</p><p>
  <em> But don’t shoot, shoot, shoot that thing at me </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The guitar solo kicked in and I leant against Bellamy as I laughed, Jasper standing above us with his hands in the air. Raven’s radar began to beep and she was forced to turn off the music. I pouted, having been enjoying myself, and Monty climbed into the front seat to take a look. </p><p> </p><p>Jasper dropped back inside with a frown, “Hey, that was the best part!” </p><p>“Tracking beacon from the Ark,” Monty announced as the rover ground to a halt. </p><p>I raised my eyebrows in surprise. I was beginning to give up hope at this point that there’d be anyone else out there. “Who is it?” </p><p>“Farm Station,” he replied, eyes wide in shock. </p><p>Miller leant forwards, instantly more interested. “What? After— after four months? How?” </p><p>“We’ll find out, where are they?” Bellamy asked Monty as the doors opened and Octavia stood next to them. </p><p>“Don’t tell me I missed the party?” She asked, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>Monty turned back to face us, “Sector eight.” </p><p>“That’s ice nation…” I trailed off. </p><p>Octavia shrugged, “What about it? Protocol says we go home, let the Chancellor decide what to do next.” </p><p>“Screw protocol,” Bellamy muttered, “The Chancellor’s not from Farm Station. Alyssa and Monty are, and so is Miller’s boyfriend. It’s your call.” </p><p>I shuddered, remembering my time on the Ark. I remembered Farm Station pretty well, up until I was forced into the SkyBox, that is. Monty nodded, “Let’s do this.” </p><p>“I’m in if you’re in,” I shrugged. There’s nothing in Farm Station waiting for me, but if Monty’s family and Miller’s boyfriend are there, then I’m willing to help. </p><p>Miller looked at the rest of the rover’s occupants, “You have to <em> ask</em>?” </p><p>“Try to keep up,” Bellamy nodded at his sister and she shut the door, mounting her horse. </p><p>~</p><p>We arrived at the woods, the border to Azgeda. I climbed out of the rover and Jasper jumped out, landing next to me. He scoffed, “Where’s all the ice?”</p><p>“Further north,” Octavia replied. “Azgeda stretches for a thousand miles.”</p><p>I whistled, looking at Monty’s tracker “Good thing we only have to go two hundred metres then.” I began to make my forward but Bellamy held out an arm to stop me. </p><p>“Slow down. Remember, rules of engagement are nonlethal force. Tight formation on my command. And Raven you stay in the rover.” Bellamy ordered.</p><p>She scoffed, “Yeah, right.” </p><p>“We need every gun we’ve got,” Octavia confirmed. </p><p>Monty looked up from the tracker, “They’re coming. Hundred and twenty metres, one ten.” Bellamy raised his gun in the direction of the voices. “They’re our people, what are you doing,” Monty asked. </p><p>“We hope they’re our people,” Bellamy replied and I nodded at him and raised my gun. “On my command.” The people appeared on horseback, and it was safe to say that they weren’t our people. “Ice nation?” He turned to Octavia who nodded. </p><p>“Yes. White war paint,” she explained before returning her sword to its sheath on her back and raising her hands. “Stay calm.” Octavia walked towards them slowly. </p><p><em> “Who are you?” </em> one of the Azgeda warriors asked in Trigedasleng, a bit of which I’d managed to pick up in the last four months— still not enough to speak it, but I understood enough of how it worked to figure out what others were saying.</p><p><em> “Skaikru,” </em> Octavia answered, <em> “We are looking for our people.” </em>The Grounder dismounted from his horse and said something to another ride before he walked towards us. Octavia turned back to speak to us in English. “They think we’re looking for Wanheda,” she explained.</p><p>“Who’s that?” I asked, puzzled.</p><p>“I don’t know,” she hissed. </p><p>Monty looked up, his eyes drawn to something on the Grounder’s belt. “The light. That’s the beacon,” he whispered. Jasper stepped out from behind me and began to walk towards them. </p><p>“Hey get back here,” Bellamy warned. </p><p>“Jasper, what are you—” Monty began.</p><p>“What are you doing?” Raven tried to get his attention. </p><p>I tried to grab his arm but he shrugged me off, “It’s okay,” he called out. “I got this.” <em> Dear god, we’re screwed. </em></p><p>“Tell them we observe the Commander’s truce,” Bellamy grabbed Octavia. “Do it now.” </p><p>Octavia informed them as Jasper grabbed the beacon from the belt around the Grounder’s waist, but the moment he did he was grabbed and a knife pressed against his throat. </p><p><em> “Where’s Wanheda?” </em> The Grounder asked.</p><p><em> “Let him go!” </em> Bellamy warned them, raising his weapon. </p><p>Octavia tried to bargain with them, saying something along the lines of ‘we can help each other,” in order to keep the peace. I kept my weapon trained on the Grounder’s head, ready to fire if necessary. </p><p>Jasper laughed, and the Azgeda soldier glared at him, <em> “You think this is funny?” </em> He slowly dragged the knife across Jasper’s throat and I fired instantly, hitting him in the shoulder with the bullet before aiming my gun at the archers. <em> Nonlethal my ass, they could have killed him! </em> Miller caught one and I got the other and both now lay in pain on the forest floor, still alive. </p><p>Jasper stumbled to his feet, clutching his throat. “Jasper, get down!” Octavia shouted as she pulled out her sword and threw it directly into the centre of the Grounder who had slit Jasper’s throat. She ran to him and pulled out her knife before grabbing Jasper. I wasn’t sure who to go to first as the radio on the rover kicked into high gear, before ultimately deciding Bellamy could handle that and Jasper needed all the help he could get. </p><p>I ran over to where Octavia was with Jasper and tore a strip of material from the bottom of my t-shirt to use to stem the flow of blood. “I thought I had him?” Jasper suggested meekly and I sighed, knowing that was most definitely not the case. </p><p>“What the hell were you thinking?” I hauled him to his feet, grabbing him on one side while Octavia slung his arm over her shoulder. We half-carried, half-dragged him back to the rover. “He needs to go to medical!” I called to Bellamy. </p><p>Jasper laughed, “I got the beacon, didn’t I?”</p><p>“Yeah, but where did <em> they </em> get it?” Monty asked worriedly, as I handed Octavia the strip of my shirt to use to wrap around Jasper’s neck. </p><p>“Take him home!” Bellamy shouted, pointing at Jasper. “Miller! Alyssa! Get one of their horses. Raven, since you can’t ride, you’re on the back. Monty, you’re with me, let’s go.” </p><p>“I’m fine, thanks for asking,” Jasper shouted to no one in particular. </p><p>I got into the back of the rover with Monty and Bellamy, despite his protests. “Not enough horses, I’m coming anyway,” I shrugged and he sighed in defeat. We drove to sector four quickly and that made it one hell of a bumpy ride. </p><p>“You were right about Jasper, okay?” Monty whispered to Bellamy as he grabbed his weapon. “Is that what you want me to say?”</p><p>“Quiet,” Bellamy warned, “Keep your eyes peeled.” Before sighing and turning to his friend, “I could’ve said no.” </p><p>“He’s getting worse, isn’t he?” I whispered, thinking about how Jasper was before he lost Maya. “Getting drunk every night is one thing…” I trailed off and Monty continued for me. </p><p>“But smiling with a knife to your throat, that’s next-level damaged. Wait, who’s he with?” </p><p>Kane emerged from the trees followed by another figure. “Indra,” I realised.</p><p>“That’s Indra?” Monty seemed surprised. </p><p>“He must’ve told her we broke the truce,” hissed Bellamy before trying to explain himself. “Sir, before you say anything, there was a good reason—” </p><p>Kane raised a hand to stop him, “We’ll deal with that later. This is about Clarke.” </p><p>My brow furrowed, “I thought we agreed that she wouldn’t be found unless she wanted to be found? What changed?” </p><p>“She’s being hunted,” Indra answered, and I sucked in a breath. </p><p>“By who?” Monty asked. </p><p>“By everyone,” she replied. I shared a look with Bellamy, however we thought Clarke’s disappearance was going to go, this… wasn’t it.</p><p>~</p><p>Monty drove the rover and I glared at Bellamy as he beat me to the passenger seat, rolling my eyes as I was forced to sit in the back in uncomfortable silence with Kane and Indra. The rover went over a bump and she looked around in concern. </p><p>“Sir, we’re almost out of range,” Monty told Kane before asking, “Are you sure you don’t want to tell the Chancellor?” </p><p>“I’m sure,” he replied. “I don’t want to worry Abby until we know something.” </p><p>I scoffed, “Isn’t ‘your daughter is being hunted’ a pretty damn big something she should know about?” Kane shot me a look and I realised now wasn’t the time. But I <em> did </em> have a point. “You people are big on those kill orders, aren’t you?” I asked anyway.</p><p>“It’s not a kill order. It’s a bounty. Clarke’s a symbol,” Indra explained. “She’s known as Wanheda— the commander of death.” </p><p>Bellamy shot Monty and I a look via the rearview mirror, “The Ice Nation guys we killed asked about Wanheda. They’re looking for Clarke, why?” </p><p>“My people believe that when you kill someone, you get their power. Kill Wanheda, and you command death,” Indra answered.</p><p>I saw Bellamy shake his head in disbelief and I ignored Kane’s reach for my arm as I stuck my head between the two front seats. “Wanheda, <em> Commander of death… </em>We’ve come a long way from ‘Princess’, haven’t we?” I whispered, and Monty nodded as I sat back down. </p><p>“She’s just one girl,” Kane couldn’t seem to comprehend it. </p><p>Indra gave him an unimpressed look, “So was the Commander. What Clarke did at Mount Weather weakened her. The Ice Nation is emboldened. Their queen wants Clarke’s power. If her people believe she has it, she’ll break the coalition and start a war. I can’t let that happen.” </p><p>Something beeped and Monty looked at us in the mirror, “Welcome to sector seven, where to now?” </p><p>“If she’s here, she’ll need supplies. We’ll start at the trading posts.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Wherever You Go, That's Where I'll Go</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Watch your language."</p><p>"With all due respect, fuck that."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Monty slammed on the breaks and I was thrown forwards, almost directly onto Indra— which would’ve been awkward had I not grabbed hold of the front seat to keep myself steady. I stuck my head through the gap at the front, “What the hell, Monty!” I groaned as we saw the tree in the road. </p><p>“We’re going to have to move it,” he sighed.</p><p>“Wait,” Indra took a closer look. “It’s been cut down.” </p><p>Bellamy waited for me to move so that he could stand up through the roof of the rover, aiming his gun. “You don’t know that,” he replied. </p><p>I waited while he surveyed the area with his gun, before ducking back inside and almost landing on me as another tree landed behind the car. Indra sighed, looking at him in disapproval. “We do now.” </p><p>We were trapped, unable to drive away unless we moved one or both of the fallen trees. I pulled out my gun and cocked it. “What’s the plan?” I began to stand up to open the doors but Kane put a hand on my shoulder and guided me back to my seat. </p><p>“We wait.” </p><p>~</p><p>The sun had risen and we were still stuck in the rover, waiting. “It’s been three hours, what are we waiting for?” Bellamy asked impatiently, “Even with the light, I don’t see anyone.” </p><p>“I say we make a run for it,” Monty suggested.</p><p>Kane shut him down, “No. That’s what they want us to do.” </p><p>“How do you know? I’m ready to just get out and ask them at this point. We can’t stay here forever, and one way or another those trees need to be moved,” I stood up but Kane stopped me again. </p><p>Indra shook her head, “They are right, they can wait longer than we can.” </p><p>“Okay, Bellamy. Get in the turret and you cover us. Once we get to that ridge over there, we’ll cover you,” Kane ordered.</p><p>Bellamy zipped up his jacket and checked his weapon, “Copy that. Run fast.” </p><p>“Be careful, don’t die,” I whispered as he pulled the roof open and stood up. </p><p>I prepared myself to run but something stopped me, movement above. I looked up and realised someone on the roof had a knife to Bellamy’s neck. “They’re here,” he told us, raising his hands. </p><p>“Everybody out, or the boy dies,” another voice from above called, a voice that I seemed to recognise but couldn’t quite pinpoint. Whoever it was, they pulled Bellamy out through the roof. </p><p>“Okay! Okay, we’re coming out,” Kane called to them. “Don’t hurt him.” </p><p>The moment he opened the door we were pulled from the vehicle and thrown to the floor, hands restricted behind our backs, they pushed us closer to the mud. “All targets secure,” a female voice called as a frantic beeping noise was moved over my head. I tried to turn to look at it but whoever was on top of me only pressed me closer to the dirt. </p><p>Someone hauled Monty to his feet and the beeping intensified. “Found it,” someone announced as they pulled the beacon from his pocket. </p><p>“It’s mine, give it back!” Monty reached for it but they pulled him further away. </p><p>“Monty, let it go,” Bellamy shouted.</p><p>“Monty?” One of the attackers whispered, their voice filled with hope.</p><p>I used the moment of confusion to turn over and push whoever was on top of me away from my back and sit upright. </p><p>Monty’s eyes widened in shock, “Mom?”</p><p>“Shit, you guys are Farm Station? Do you <em> mind </em> stopping your ambush then?” I groaned, holding out a hand to pull Bellamy to his feet once whoever was on top of him subsided. </p><p>Monty’s mom removed her mask and pulled him into a hug. Someone else called out the order: “Farm Station stand down,” and we could relax. </p><p>“Pike?” Kane asked in bewilderment, and the man removed his helmet and I realised it was the old earth skills teacher from the Ark. </p><p>“You have no idea how good it is to see you,” Pike helped Kane to his feet, laughing. “Lacroix, Smith, watch our six. Everyone else, I said stand down.” </p><p>Monty looked around, “Where’s dad?” </p><p>His mother’s face fell, “Your father didn’t make it.” She wrapped him in another hug. </p><p>“How many?” Kane asked.</p><p>“Sixty three, the rest are in a camp further up from here. Grounder killers one and all, am I right?” Pike announced proudly as a cheer rose from the rest of Farm Station in response.</p><p>I rolled my eyes, “Well shit, nobody told you about the life-saving truce?” </p><p>“Hate to cut this short, but we gotta find Clarke,” Bellamy walked over to Kane. </p><p>“Clarke Griffin?” Pike raised his eyebrows in surprise, “Yeah. If only all of my earth skills students were as good as her.” </p><p>“It’s good to see you, Sir,” Bellamy shook Pike’s hand. </p><p>“Help them move the tree!” Pike told the rest of Farm Station, and Monty cut his reunion with his mom short to help them. </p><p>I felt a hand on my shoulder and I turned around quickly, ready to stab someone. The face in front of me was only the one I see in my nightmares and I brushed the hand away and took a step back. </p><p>“Alyssa? I thought they floated you before they sent the others down to the ground… it’s nice to see you’re alive.”</p><p>“I wish I could say the same, <em> Henry</em>,” I spat. </p><p>He reeled back, “Don’t call me that, Alyssa. I’m your father!” </p><p>I laughed, “and a <em> damn </em> good one you were too.” </p><p>“Don’t talk to me with that tone,” he rounded on me. </p><p>I rolled my eyes, “Bite me, <em> Henry</em>.” He took a step forward, raising his fist but Bellamy was there within seconds standing in between us. He shot me a look of concern and I was forced to explain. “This jackass is my father, <em> Henry. </em>”</p><p>“Are we going to have a problem, Henry?” Bellamy looked at him somehow both intimidatingly but also politely and I tried to hide the smile that was creeping across my face. </p><p>Henry looked between the gun and Bellamy’s stern look before ultimately conceding. “Nope, no problem here, Sir.” I almost laughed and had to disguise it with a cough, which then genuinely turned into a coughing fit because I could barely breathe through the laughter. Henry walked off towards the others from Farm Station and I leant against Bellamy and wiped my eyes. </p><p>“You okay?” He looked genuinely concerned at the tears but once I stopped coughing I was able to reassure him. </p><p>“I’m gonna be fine. As long as he doesn’t go out of his way to talk to me, I won’t beat the living crap out of him. But inside I’m still dying laughing at the fact that Henry just called you <em> sir</em>,” I cackled, tilting my head back and shaking with laughter. </p><p>He sighed, trying not to smile. “Okay, I’m going to go ask Kane what the plan is. Try not to murder anyone in the meantime?” </p><p>“Okay… <em> sir</em>,” I waggled my eyebrows and he pulled a face, which only made me laugh harder. </p><p>Monty came over, concerned. “You look like you’re about to pass out…” Which was technically true since I was <em> very </em> out of breath. I shook my head and smiled. </p><p>“Sorry, I’m fine. My dad just called Bellamy <em> sir </em> because he was so intimidated by him and I can’t stop laughing,” I leant on him and tried to compose myself. </p><p>“Which one’s your dad? I don’t remember him from the Ark.” </p><p>“Oh, he pretty much kept to himself, mostly dealt with the guy next door. He’s that asshole over there,” I pointed.</p><p>“Really? He seemed—” Monty looked at my face before continuing— “like a total dick. The worst. A stain on mankind, really.” </p><p>I smiled at his attempt to make me feel better and slung an arm around him. “Where now?”</p><p>“To find Clarke.”</p><p>~</p><p>We managed to get to the first trading post unscathed, but it was uneventful so we moved on to the second one. When we arrived and pulled up the rover, I could hear crashes and screams so Bellamy and I went on ahead to scout out the disturbance. Raising our guns before going in, I spotted a large Grounder throwing around a woman. He pulled out a knife and leant over her, Bellamy firing out a single shot before the larger Grounder could hurt her any more. The man fell from on top of her and the Grounder woman scrambled to her feet. </p><p>“Are you okay? You alright?” Bellamy checked on her and she stopped backing away. </p><p>Indra stopped over the dead man and shook her head, “Bounty hunter.” </p><p>“Shit, Clarke’s in real trouble,” I muttered, and the woman’s eyes flickered over me at what I thought might have been the mention of Clarke’s name, but I could have just been imagining it. </p><p><em> “We’re here to help,” </em> Indra told the woman, a phrase I’d heard quite a few times before. </p><p>Pike raised his weapon towards Indra, “English.” </p><p>Kane sighed quietly before turning to him, “Pike, go outside. Take Monty and Hannah, search the perimeter, make sure he was alone.” Pike seemed uneasy, but he followed Monty and his mom out of the door without too much disagreement. </p><p><em> “We’re looking for Wanheda,” </em> Indra explained. </p><p>The woman’s eyes strayed towards the dead man on the ground, “So was he.”</p><p>“Please, she’s in danger,” Bellamy pleaded. </p><p>“You’re Skaikru?” She asked.</p><p>I nodded, “Yeah, and we’re friends of Wanheda.”</p><p>“She was here last night,” the woman revealed. </p><p>Kane took a step towards her, “Did she say where she was going?” </p><p>“No, she was here when I fell asleep and gone when I woke up.” </p><p>“Did she give you any indication of where she might go?” he asked.</p><p>“No…” Her eyes once again fell on the dead man. “But he did. He said his partner came back for her. He was Ice Nation. I hope <em> you </em> find her.” </p><p>I sighed, “Thank you for your help, we really appreciate it…” </p><p>“Niylah.” </p><p>“Thank you again, Niylah,” Bellamy said gratefully. </p><p>Monty came back in, “I have good and bad news.” </p><p>Bellamy started with “We’ll take the good news first,” as I asked, “What’s the bad news?” He paused to look at me, “Why the bad news first?” </p><p>“Bad news then good news. Bad news is bad and then the good news <em> afterwards </em> gives ya hope. That’s how it works? How do you do it the opposite way around?” I raised an eyebrow. </p><p>“It’s easier to plan!” He protested, but I rolled my eyes and we both turned back to Monty. “We’ll take the <em> good </em> news first.” </p><p>“Good news, I’ve found fresh tracks,” Monty revealed. </p><p>Bellamy nodded, “Good, start the rover.” </p><p>“That’s the bad news— too many trees. We’ll have to continue on foot,” he explained. </p><p>Bellamy’s face fell and I looked at him with an unsurprised look at my face. “This is why you get the bad news first.” </p><p>A few hours later, we were walking through fields of tall grass and trying to follow Clarke and the Azgeda bounty hunter’s tracks. I walked beside Bellamy to let Monty and his mother talk, with Indra and Kane in the lead and Pike slightly behind us. Pike caught up, a strange look on his face. “Can I ask you a question?” He asked, technically already asking a question. </p><p>“Technically, you just did,” I raised an eyebrow. </p><p>Pike laughed, “Fair enough. Last report we got on the Ark, you were under attack by Grounders. What changed?” </p><p>“Well it turns out we had a common enemy,” Bellamy explained. </p><p>Pike seemed surprised, “What happened to them?” </p><p>“We killed them,” I replied blankly, at the same time as Bellamy deadpanned, “We won.” </p><p>“Quiet,” Indra held up a hand and stopped. “Listen.” I paid closer attention to the surrounding area, listening to the sound as it was carried along by the wind. <em> War drums</em>. Kane said my thoughts out loud and Indra nodded. “Azgeda.” </p><p>“You can tell it’s Ice Nation from the sound?” Monty asked, intrigued.</p><p>“No,” Indra replied, “From them.” She pointed towards the dead warriors on the pathway ahead. <em> Well, shit. </em> </p><p>We were ready to duck for cover when Pike began to run towards the fallen soldiers. “We need to get those bodies off the field, unless you’re good with them thinking we did this.” </p><p>“Good point,” I nodded, racing towards the nearest soldier and attempting to drag them out of sight. “Can someone give me a hand? This armour ain’t made of feathers,” I sighed. Kane stayed covering the others with Bellamy while Monty and his mother helped me drag one of the warriors out of sight into the treeline, Pike doing the same with the other one. </p><p>Bellamy halted, “Wait, two people at ten o’clock.” He raised his gun and froze, before shaking off the shock and turning back to us. “It’s Clarke.” He made a run for it but Pike grabbed him before he got the chance. </p><p>“Hey, hey! Wait! You’ll never make it in time!” Pike stopped him. </p><p>“He’s right,” Monty agreed. “Look.” I turned and spotted the rows of Azgeda warriors, my eyes widening in surprise as I realised how many of them were there. </p><p>I sighed, “No way we get across without being seen.”</p><p>“We should lay low, let the army pass, and then we find Clarke,” Pike suggested calmly. Bellamy watched as Clarke and her captor continued to make their way across the field, pain staining his face as he seemingly watched his only chance of getting to her slowly slip away with every second the distance between us and the army decreases. </p><p>Monty pointed across, “Look, a cave. We can wait for them to pass in there.” </p><p>“We just got lucky,” Pike laughed. </p><p>Indra stopped, “I cannot come with you. Ice Nation has crossed the border. They’re marching against my Commander, I have to warn her.”</p><p>“We’ll get Clarke,” Kane reassured her. </p><p>“You better. If the Ice Queen gets her first, she’ll be dead. And we’ll be at war.” Well, Indra had never been the optimistic type, as far as I’d seen. We took cover in the cave, hiding in the darkness and waiting for the Azgeda army to pass. Bellamy had begun to pace and he didn’t stop even when we had to retreat further into the cave to avoid being seen by the Azgeda warriors. </p><p>“Hey,” I grabbed him. “Save your energy. Can’t save Clarke if you’re dead on your feet and you know that.”</p><p>He raked a hand through his hair, “We’re losing her!” </p><p>“She’s right, son. You’ll need your strength for what comes next,” Pike put a hand on Bellamy’s shoulder to comfort him. He nodded and walked closer to the cave’s entrance, sitting on a rock and putting his head in his hands. </p><p>I sat down next to him, “When she left a few months ago, I told you she was going to be okay. I still believe that now. Yes, she’s being hunted, and yes she’s now ‘Wanheda: Commander of Death’, but she’s also <em> Clarke</em>. She’s a fighter.” </p><p>He nodded at me and managed a small smile. “You’re right.” There was movement behind us and I turned around as Monty sat down next to his mother and asked her a question. She sighed, holding out a hand to her son before starting the story. I looked at Bellamy and we both stood up and walked closer, sitting down not too far away to give them a little bit of space while still allowing ourselves the ability to listen. </p><p>“We landed in the snow. Your father said it absorbed some of the impact. That’s why we survived.” Her eyes began to fill with tears. “The snow looked so beautiful, it… Charles?” Hannah was unable to continue so Pike took over, walking towards us to explain. </p><p>“The children were playing in it. They were the first to die. Fifteen of them. If not for your father, it would’ve been more. He pulled four kids back into the ship. All four alive today. They got him when he went back for the fifth.” </p><p>Bellamy looked away and I found myself staring at the floor, turning one of my knives over and over in my hands repeatedly for something to do. Monty continued to watch his mother, his eyes watering as he listened to Pike. </p><p>“Your father died a hero, Monty. We’ve been fighting Grounders ever since.” </p><p>“That was Ice Nation,” Kane whispered, “Not all Grounders are the same.” </p><p>“They are to me,” Pike replied gravely. </p><p>I sighed, “We have an alliance. So I hate to break it to you, but whatever hatred you have for them, you are going to have to put it aside for the sake of everyone else. So you can take your grudge, and you can shove it—” </p><p>Bellamy coughed, cutting me off before I could finish. I shot him a glare, mouthing “What?” He simply shook his head in response and I sighed. </p><p>“Tell me about Mount Weather,” Pike asked. </p><p>“They were using us for our blood. They couldn’t metabolise the radiation so they tried stealing bone marrow for a permanent cure,” I explained. </p><p>“Forty-two of us got out alive. We did what we had to,” Monty finished. </p><p>Pike sighed, “You did the right thing, kill or be killed. So Mount Weather is ours now?” </p><p>“Yes,” Kane answered. “We use it for supplies.” </p><p>“Supplies? It’s a nuclear hardened underground city,” he frowned. </p><p>“We established a truce,” Kane explained. “We need to think about perception.” </p><p>Pike scoffed, “We need to think about what happens when the Grounders break that truce, because they will.” </p><p>I looked to Bellamy, “<em>Now </em> can I tell him where to shove his prejudice?”</p><p>But Bellamy wasn’t there. </p><p>Grabbing Monty, I looked around and spotted where we had laid the two dead Azgeda fighters. One of them was missing their armour. <em> Oh crap. Bellamy, what are you doing? </em> “Shit, shit! Goddammit!” </p><p>“Watch your language,” Pike responded, his teacher-like annoyance showing through. </p><p>“With all due respect, fuck that.” </p><p>Kane raised an eyebrow, “That doesn’t sound very respectful.” </p><p>“Hey, I said with due respect, I didn’t specify how much,” I sighed, walking out of the cave. </p><p>Monty grabbed me, pulling me back inside. “What the hell are you doing?”</p><p>“Going after him, what do you think I’m doing? He will think with his heart and not his head, and he’ll get himself killed. He cares too much for her and it will cloud his judgement.” I answered matter-of-factly. “And I care too much about <em> him </em> to let that happen.” </p><p>“The army is thinning out, we won’t have to wait much longer,” Monty pleaded. </p><p>I scoffed, “Screw that, I’m going around them.” So I did. I walked to the side, back along the outskirts of the field until the army almost passed before getting down and crawling my way through the grass. I held still while the last of the warriors passed before shooting to my feet and making a run for the treeline. Once I was under the cover of the trees, I let out a breath. </p><p>A twig snapped behind me and I spun around, looking in every direction to figure out where it came from. When the figure stumbled into view I practically cried in relief, but it was short-lived as I realised Bellamy was injured. “What the fuck were you thinking?” I ran to him, “What happened?” </p><p>“I— I— I almost got her. I—” he panted, clutching his leg. </p><p>I shook my head, tearing off more fabric off the bottom of my shirt to tie around his leg to slow the bleeding. “God, if all of my friends keep running into life-threatening situations like this, I’m going to have to start wearing longer shirts or I won’t have any clothes left,” I sighed as I tied it, pulling it tight and pulling his other arm around my shoulders. It was barely a few minutes before the others appeared, and they must have taken a more direct route than I did after Azgeda had gone. “Somebody find the trail,” I called to them, most of my energy going towards keeping Bellamy upright. </p><p>“It’s useless,” Pike replied as he caught up. “They know they’re being followed now.” </p><p>Bellamy lifted his arm back over and used it to try and propel himself forwards in a feeble attempt to follow them. I grabbed him and pushed him against the tree with a stern look, “<em>No. </em> You can’t even walk, it’s not happening.” </p><p>“So— what, we— we just give up? Let him kill her?” He pushed off from the tree and tried again, limping forward through the wood with more determination than I’d ever seen.</p><p>My stern look morphed into a more unimpressed one, “Since when have we <em> ever </em> done that? Hey—” I grabbed him, but it was mostly to keep him upright. “I want to find her too, okay? But you are no use to her if you’re bleeding out in the forest somewhere because you refuse to acknowledge your own limits.” </p><p>“We can’t lose Clarke, we— we can’t lose her,” Bellamy’s voice reached a crescendo before dropping to a bare whisper. </p><p>Monty came over, “We will figure something out, I promise. But this isn’t the way.” </p><p>“We are in no way giving up, do you hear me? It’s not happening. But we have to take a break. You can’t die out here, okay? You’re too important for that. Come on,” this time Bellamy let me pull his arm over my shoulders for support and I kept him upright, focusing all of my strength to just get him to the rover. I turned to the others, “We’re heading back.” Monty grabbed his other arm and propped him up, taking some of the pressure off from me, and for which I was grateful. </p><p>We got back to the rover and I hauled him into the vehicle, letting him lean on me in the back. “We can’t lose her,” Bellamy whispered, his voice raspy and quiet. </p><p>“We won’t. But Clarke can take care of herself, and you need to be able to do that too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Chapter title from "Heads and Tails" by BANNERS.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Where Did We All Go Wrong?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Like father, like daughter. But if you ever say that I will hurt you."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I sat cross-legged on the floor while Astrid sat behind me, cutting my hair so that it barely touched my shoulders. “I can do this myself,” I laughed.</p><p>“If you keep cutting more off every time you get blood in it you won’t have any hair left!” She protested, “You will thank me later.” Rolling my eyes, I tilted my head backwards and she kissed me from above. “So what are you doing today?”</p><p>“Going to Mount Weather with a couple of others on a supply run, I think. Not really sure why, but it’s mostly to make sure none of them do anything stupid while we’re there,” I shrugged.</p><p>Astrid gasped, “I thought doing stupid things was <em> your </em> speciality!”</p><p>“You know me too well,” I laughed, running my hands through the short hair on the side she had finished with. Before I had a chance to ask her what she was doing with <em> her </em> day, there was a banging on the door. I sighed, pushing myself upright despite her protests about my incredibly uneven hair. “Who is it?” I called as I opened the door a fraction.</p><p><em> Of course. </em> I should’ve known he wouldn’t give up that easily. Henry stood leaning against the door frame, his foot in the way of my closing the door. “I want to talk,” he requested.</p><p>“And I want you to go float yourself, but I guess we don’t always get what we want,” I slammed the heel of my boot onto his foot and once he moved it away as a pain response I locked the door behind him. “Bellamy says I can’t kill him, but Henry makes it <em> so </em> hard,” I muttered to myself as I leant against the door, feeling him pound against it from the other side.</p><p>“Alyssa! We need to talk about what happened before you left!” He shouted. </p><p>“Screw you! We have nothing to talk about!” I shot back.</p><p>“You murdered our next-door neighbour, Alyssa. I’m pretty sure that qualifies as a good enough reason to have a goddamn conversation!”</p><p>My hands clenched into fists and it took all of my strength to resist the overwhelming urge to punch the wall. “If you hadn’t been such a <em> jackass </em> my entire life then maybe things would’ve turned out differently! Get the fuck out of here!” </p><p>The banging subsided and I sank down against the door until my arms were resting on my knees and my head was in my hands. I groaned, hitting the back of my head against the door lightly.</p><p>“You killed your neighbour?” Astrid whispered cautiously. “That’s why you were in the Skybox?”</p><p>“He was a crappy human being who was abusing my mom, so yes. I killed my neighbour,” I replied matter-of-factly.</p><p>Her eyes widened, “When?”</p><p>“When I was fifteen,” I answered blankly. “Why?”</p><p>She scrambled to her feet, shocked. “That’s not the kind of news you just <em> drop </em> on someone, Lyssa.” </p><p>“Why does it matter?” I groaned, “You know I killed Grounders and Mountain Men.” </p><p>Astrid paused, “That was different. That was self-defence.” </p><p>“Well it wasn’t a fucking picnic,” I snapped. “None of it was.” </p><p>“It’s psychotic!”</p><p>I shot her a glare, “Gee, thanks. I know I’m a little fucked up, but I don’t really need your input on my past, thanks.” </p><p>“You’re a murderer!” Astrid screamed.</p><p>Sighing, I nodded, running out of energy to fight or even explain. “Yes.” </p><p>“When were you planning on telling me?” </p><p>“I didn’t think it was relevant, considering it happened over three years ago. If you have a problem with that then I’m sorry, but there’s nothing that you can actually <em> do </em> about it because it has already <em> happened</em>,” I sniped. </p><p>Astrid refused to meet my eyes, looking all around the room and everywhere but me. Her eyes fell on my jacket, the jacket she knows most of my knives are kept in, before straying to the scissors in her own hand that she had been using to cut my hair with. “This is so messed up,” she choked.</p><p>“You think I don’t know that? There’s not much I can do about it now, is there?” </p><p>“I don’t think I can date a cold-blooded murderer,” by the time she could finally bring her eyes to look at me, it wasn’t with the same warmth they had shown when we first met. No, this was a mixture of fear and shock, and it was slowly tearing my defences apart. </p><p>“I don’t think I can date someone who looks at me like I’m a monster,” I whispered. It had taken a lot to overcome the daunting feeling that hit me every time I did something bad, the feeling that made me think that when I was around, people die. The feeling of blaming myself for everything that happened to everyone because I could. Because I was a monster. I hadn’t felt that feeling in a long time, and I’ll be damned if I start that shit up again now I’ve spent months being over it.</p><p>She took a deep breath, “Then I guess we can’t date.” Astrid picked up her jacket silently and I stood up, leaning on the desk for support to allow her to walk out the door. She placed the scissors on the desk before she left, not even sparing me another glance. The door swung shut behind her and I locked it, the only thing I could think of doing. <em> Fuck! </em> I kicked over the bin, stray pieces of paper and hair flying everywhere. I looked in the mirror at my uneven hair and sighed, pulling the rest of it around to the front and finishing it with one snip of the scissors. It was in no way as neat as the rest, but my hair never stays neat for very long anyway. Once I was done, I hurtled the scissors at the wall and a chip appeared as they didn’t stick but bounced off, leaving just a crack in their place. <em> Shit. </em></p><p>
  <em> Well done, Alyssa. Another thing you’ve managed to fuck up.  </em>
</p><p>I took a deep breath before unlocking the door and grabbing my jacket, shutting it behind me as I left and walked through the corridors until I was breathing fresh outside air. <em> Goddamit! </em> I pulled out a knife and hurled it at the nearest shooting target, ignoring the surprised shouts as it landed in the centre, disrupting the training session. </p><p>A distraction. I needed a distraction. <em> The Mount Weather run. </em> The Mount Weather run which leaves in… ten minutes. I needed a separate distraction for those ten minutes. And he walked right past me, barely acknowledging my existence. He wanted to talk, huh? Let’s see how good he is at explaining himself when my fist is doing all the talking. </p><p>“Hey, Henry!” I shouted, causing him to turn back and raise an eyebrow. I stormed over, building momentum. “You ruined my life once, and today you managed to do it again! For the second time! Go float yourself!” I screamed, my fist connecting with his face. He stumbled back, shoving me off him and onto the dirt but I scrambled to my feet ready to hit him again. “Listen to me you sick sonofa—” </p><p>Hands grabbed me from behind and pinned my arms to my sides as I tried to kick out of their grasp. “I specifically told you not to kill him,” Bellamy hissed, dragging me away from my father as he nursed his bleeding nose. “You need to cool down.” </p><p>“You need to shove off and let me kick his sorry ass,” I muttered in response, pushing him away from me as soon as we got into the garage.</p><p>Bellamy reached for my arm, turning me around to face him. “You were happy last night when I last saw you, what happened between then and now that changed that?”</p><p>“That asshole turned up at my room wanting to talk and told my girlfriend that I’m a cold-hearted murdering monster and long story short, <em> she’s </em> now my ex and <em> he </em> has managed to ruin my life yet again!” I choked, tears beginning to obscure my vision as I leant on Bellamy for support. </p><p>He kept me upright as he led me out of sight and into the corner to help me calm down. “Hey, you’re not a monster.” </p><p>“That’s what I thought, that’s what I’d finally been able to get my head around. Just… with him here it’s bringing everything back. <em> Especially </em> the memories of what happened when we were all tripping on hallucinogenic nuts and half of that shit wasn’t even real and it <em> still </em> managed to haunt me for weeks— months, even…” I trailed off, raking a hand through my now short hair. “I hate having him here. I wish he’d been one of the ones to die when Farm Station landed. I hate how good people are dead and he’s a piece of crap and he’s still here!”</p><p>“I know. I know,” he comforted me. I sighed and hugged him and he wrapped his arms around me. It was weird, even though he was squeezing me tightly… it felt like I could finally breathe. The last twenty minutes had happened in a blur of emotion and I had barely had time to react to everything so it came out all at once. I could barely think straight, let alone remember to breathe, but I synced my breaths in time to Bellamy’s and began to calm down. </p><p>Once we separated, I took another deep breath. “Thank you,” I wiped my forehead with the back of my hand, wincing as the bruise on my knuckles grazed it. “Fuck, that’s going to hurt later.” </p><p>“Ice it, come back, and then we can leave. I’ll round everyone up.” </p><p>“Okay,” I nodded. “Good plan.” </p><p>I pulled the MP3 out of my pocket and pressed play, putting the earbuds in to avoid conversations with anyone I might run into on the way to medical. Abby and Kane had left for Polis to talk to the Commander which meant that Jackson was basically running things. </p><p>“In here, now,” he called, more sternly than I’d ever seen him. I followed him into the side room which was completely empty. </p><p>“What?” I pulled out the earphones, interrupting Bruno Mars’ <em> Uptown Funk </em> as I raised my eyebrows. </p><p>He shot a glance to the door separating the operating room from the main area. “I had a feeling you’d be coming in, since the man you assaulted is sitting on the final bed getting stitches in his hand and I’d rather not have a repeat of that.”</p><p>“Okay, I threw all of my anger at his face, the hand was <em> not </em> my fault,” I protested as he handed me an ice pack to reduce the swelling. </p><p>Jackson sighed, “I know, but you’re the cause of his broken nose. He punched the wall just before he came in because he was angry at you. I don’t want him to see you or anyone else until he’s calmed down in case he does it again, or it actually reaches its intended target this time.” He looked at me and I managed a small smile. </p><p>“Like father like daughter,” I scoffed, before turning to Jackson, “If you ever tell anyone I said that, I <em> will </em> hurt you.” </p><p>He laughed, “I won’t, but that does explain a lot. Try not to injure yourself any more?” </p><p>“I’m afraid I can’t make any promises,” I gave him a mock-salute and he rolled his eyes. “I’ll see you soon.”</p><p>“I really hope you don’t have to!” he called after me as I left. </p><p>~</p><p>The rover pulled up and Bellamy was the first out. He still had a slight limp from being stabbed which I hadn’t noticed earlier. Octavia groaned as she got out, clearly regretting her decision of joining us instead of coming on horseback. Raven eased herself out of the driver’s seat and I hopped out the back with Gina. </p><p>Gina began talking to Bellamy and I pulled my earphones out of my pocket to put them in my ears, pausing and hanging them around my neck while I scrolled through my slowly building playlist that I’d been adding to each time the device played a new song that I liked. </p><p>“As soon as your leg heals, you’ll be right back out there,” Gina assured him. </p><p>As per usual, Bellamy downplayed his injury. “My leg’s <em> fine.</em>” </p><p>“Sure,” I cut in, “If it was fine then you’d be able to take me up on that offer for sparring… Since you’re <em> so </em> convinced you can beat me with ease.” </p><p>Gina tried to hide her laugh as Bellamy shook his head, rolling his eyes at me and repeating himself. “My leg is <em> fine</em>, Kane’s just trying to teach me a lesson.” </p><p>Raven appeared, grabbing a bag from the back and tossing it to me before grabbing one for herself. “You guys, did I ever tell you how I saved Sinclair’s ass on the Ark?” </p><p>“Please don’t,” Octavia groaned and Raven laughed. </p><p>“You mean that time you went rogue on a spacewalk?” Gina asked.</p><p>“That depends on your definition of going rogue,” Raven laughed, “I just hopped on a robotic arm and aimed it at the solar array. The whole time I was out there, control thought I was just fixing a loose wire.”</p><p>Gina laughed, “That is the definition of “going rogue”. You dangled yourself within inches of an electrified array that could’ve killed you. </p><p>“Only time I ever heard Sinclair lose his cool on comms,” Raven smirked. </p><p>“So how long were you benched?” I asked.</p><p>Raven scoffed, “Benched? I got the job done in record time, he promoted me. What can I say? Sinclair thinks I can do no wrong.” </p><p>I laughed, “That level of confidence is concerning, I feel like that statement will come back to bite you in the ass at some point.” </p><p>We rounded the corner and stopped. Rock music was playing in the dining room and it was filled with people from Farm Station. Luckily enough for me, my dad was at Arkadia so there was no chance of running into him. Pike stood up, “Welcome! Join us.” </p><p>“Someone’s made themselves at home,” I shot Raven a look which she reciprocated, shaking her head at it.</p><p>Octavia looked around, “There must be thirty of them in here.” </p><p>“Thirty-five, but the more, the merrier!” Pike shook Bellamy’s hand and I rolled my eyes. </p><p>“Wow, the Grounders are gonna think we moved in,” Octavia raised an eyebrow. </p><p>“Well, there wasn’t much room at the inn,” Pike explained.</p><p>“And this is your option?” Octavia scoffed. </p><p>Bellamy turned around to stop her, “O—” </p><p>She cut him off, “I’m out of here.” Octavia handed me her bag and I took it, letting her go. </p><p>Pike looked in her direction before turning his attention back to Bellamy. “Spirited.” </p><p>“Yeah,” he replied. </p><p>Sinclair appeared at the other side of the room and shouted across it. “Reyes! You’re three hours late, we’ve got no power to medical, fluctuations on levels two and three, and blown fuses all over the place.” He crossed his arms, “Get on it.” </p><p>I shared a look with Gina, laughing and raising an eyebrow at Raven. “You can do no wrong, huh?” </p><p>~</p><p>A half-hour later and the bustle of the mountain’s newest occupants was starting to bother me, even through my headphones. I made my way towards the exit and pushed the door open, surprised to see a disturbance between two of the Farm Station workers, a Grounder, and Octavia and Bellamy. </p><p>“What’s going on?” I jogged over. </p><p>“She threatened the summit,” the Farm Station man explained. </p><p>The Grounder tried to break free of her restraints, “I was <em> trying </em> to help.”</p><p>“Shut up,” the man replied, kicking the back of her leg and causing her to fall to the ground. </p><p>I stepped forwards, “Do that again and I’ll gut you,” pulling a knife out of my jacket.</p><p>“Leave her alone,” Octavia warned them. </p><p>“I said get your hands off her,” Bellamy’s expression went cold.  I used the knife I was holding to cut the woman’s restraints, freeing her so Bellamy could help her to her feet. </p><p>“What are you doing? She’s a Grounder?” The man protested but I simply raised the knife again to shut him up, using it to shoo him away. </p><p>“Echo, what are you talking about?” Bellamy asked her. </p><p>“The summit’s a trap,” Echo explained, “The assassin is already there. By sundown, your people will die.” </p><p>“Inside, we need to talk to the others,” I suggested and Bellamy and Octavia nodded. The four of us went back into the mountain and let Echo sit down in one of the comfy dining hall chairs. Bellamy grabbed Pike and Octavia radioed to try and get a message to Abby and Kane. </p><p>“I was with the queen’s army heading toward Polis. The war chief talks too loud,” Echo said bluntly. </p><p>Pike narrowed his eyes at her warily, “You’re one of them, so why are you telling us this?” </p><p>“We abandoned Skaikru in the battle for the mountain,” Echo answered. “It was wrong.” </p><p>“And won’t they miss you?” Pike asked. </p><p>Echo sighed, Pike was clearly getting on her nerves. “Maybe. That’s why we need to hurry.” </p><p>“Pike, she saved my life. We can trust her,” Bellamy promised. “Listen up, okay. If we want to get to Polis before the attack we have to move.”</p><p>“Attack?” Sinclair appeared, “Do we have confirmation of that?”</p><p>“We radioed but no answer,” I explained. </p><p>Pike shook his head, “They may already be dead for all we know. And if they are, we need to be ready to respond.” </p><p>“Don’t make this about the missiles,” Sinclair stepped closer to him. </p><p>I groaned, “The alliance was going fine until you showed up and decided to move in here! For all we know, they could think that this was us breaking the truce and they could be against us for this! The mountain held hundreds of their people prisoners and you’re treating it like a damn bed and breakfast.” </p><p>“This is about survival!” Pike pressed on, “We don’t have the numbers but the missiles in this mountain even the playing field and you know I’m right.” </p><p>“How about I show you where you can shove your bloody missiles?” I threatened, but Bellamy pulled me back and shot me a gaze that was the complete and utter embodiment of the word ‘no’. </p><p>“Even if I did agree with you, we still don’t have the launch codes,” Sinclair diffused the situation. </p><p>Raven sighed, “No, but we have me.” </p><p>Sinclair raised his eyebrows and walked over to her, “And you accuse engineers of arrogance?” </p><p>“I’m growing as a person,” she shrugged, making her way to the control room and leaving Sinclair was a small amused smile on his face. </p><p>Pike pulled Echo to her feet and led out of the dining room, “Let’s go.” </p><p>Octavia shot me a look and we followed close behind, making sure he didn’t try anything. I grabbed a gun and after saying goodbye to Gina, Bellamy appeared so we could get in the rover. Pike sat in the back with me and Echo and Octavia took the passenger seat in the front. Every time Pike looked as if he was about to start a conversation I’d either visibly change the song on my MP3 or begin to sharpen one of my knives, refusing to look at his face. Echo shifted uncomfortably in the awkward silence.</p><p>I couldn’t put my finger on it, but there was just something about that man that I did not like.</p><p>I climbed out first, stepping in front of him and jumping down. I put my music away as Octavia jumped down from the front with Bellamy shutting his door shortly after. The other rover was just in front of us, and Bellamy made a point of going first and raising his gun. </p><p>“Where are the guards?” He edged forwards slowly, but Octavia was none for subtlety and she walked straight towards the other rover. “Protocol would be to leave someone behind.” </p><p>I joined her, on edge the moment I saw the front seats of the other vehicle, “They did.” There were two figures sitting there lifeless, their throats slit and their uniforms covered in blood, which was also splattered over the windshield. </p><p>Pike stormed towards Echo and I moved in front of her, “This was your people!” He spat at her. </p><p><em> “Screw you,” </em> she shot back in Trigedasleng. </p><p>“Hey, she warned us. She’s the reason we’re here, remember?” I reminded him. “By the way, my alliance is with the Grounders, not <em> you</em>. So if you decide to try anything I can injure you in a <em> lethal </em> way.” He glared at me but I gave him a blank stare in return. </p><p>“This proves she was telling the truth,” Octavia commented. </p><p>Bellamy commented, “We don’t have time for this. The attack is at sundown.” </p><p>“Bellamy’s right,” I agreed, turning to the sign at the entrance. “I’m not leaving my weapons here. One, because it’s unsafe and two, because we’ll be here too long.” </p><p>“None of us are,” Echo insisted, “We go in through the tunnels. The entrance is this way.” </p><p>She led us to the tunnels and all the while I kept a firm eye on Pike. I also had the habit of making it obvious that I was doing so by continuously shooting him dagger-like glares every so often. The tunnels were dark and the only light came from our flashlights. According to Echo, it wasn’t that much further before we reached the elevator shaft. </p><p>Bellamy put out his hand to stop us upon hearing movement further ahead. He peered around the corner before reporting, “Two guards.”</p><p>“They raise the lift,” Echo replied. “The elevator shaft is our only way in. We have to climb.”</p><p>Pike began to move forward, “I’ve got the left.” He grabbed the man and stabbed him in the stomach, leaving him to bleed out on the floor while Bellamy killed the guard on the right. </p><p>“We’re not going to make it,” I whispered worriedly. </p><p>Octavia looked at her brother in disbelief, “You didn’t have to kill them.” </p><p>“Yeah, I did,” he replied bluntly. </p><p>I raised an eyebrow at him as he pulled the door to the shaft open, “No, you didn’t.” </p><p>“How many floors?” He asked Echo, ignoring me. </p><p>“All of them,” she deadpanned. So we started to climb. Bellamy was above me and Octavia behind as I climbed. And I have to say, it was a <em> long </em> climb. My hands were aching by the time we got to the top and I could only just hold my gun as we burst through the door, interrupting the summit. </p><p>Needless to say, everyone was shocked to see us. </p><p>Pike moved everyone out of the way of the door and we raised our weapons, but there didn’t seem to be any real threat. I paused, <em> something wasn’t right. </em> Clarke was standing at the centre of it all next to Lexa, and she was more surprised than anyone else to see us. “The summit’s a trap, we need to get you out of here,” Bellamy called to Clarke. </p><p>Clarke turned to Lexa, “What the hell is going on?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” she replied, and the Commander seemed genuinely confused to see us. </p><p>“It’s the Ice Nation,” Bellamy explained. </p><p>“These allegations are an outrage! The Ice Nation never stormed our summit with weapons, breaking our laws,” one of the Azgeda representatives protested. “That was the Skaikru!”</p><p>“We’re right about this,” Pike slowly turned, almost as if his goal was to aim his gun monetarily at almost every Grounder in this place. “The two guards you left behind are dead already. We need to go now.” </p><p>The Commander looked furious by now, “How did you come by this information?”</p><p>Bellamy turned around and so did I. <em> Echo was gone. </em> I looked at him, “Where the hell is Echo?” She had disappeared completely. “We are <em> so </em> screwed,” I hissed to Octavia, slightly more quietly. </p><p>“What’s going on? Where the hell is she?” Bellamy looked around, cursing under his breath. </p><p>
  <em> We had been played. </em>
</p><p>“Bellamy, maybe we were wrong about this,” Octavia said quietly. </p><p>He looked around, “I don’t understand…” </p><p>Kane stepped forwards and took his gun, “Stand down.” </p><p>I looked around, trying to figure out how this could have happened and why. Was it a threat to the coalition? Was it to make them distrust Skaikru? My heart stopped, <em> what if it was a distraction? </em></p><p>Raven’s voice crackled to life through the radio on Bellamy’s belt and he picked it up instantly. “Bellamy, Bellamy come in,” she pleaded. “The Grounders attacked Mount Weather.”</p><p>“What are you talking about?” He asked, worry written all over his face.</p><p>“It’s gone,” Raven choked, “It’s gone. They’re all gone. Sinclair and I are the only ones left.” She sobbed through the radio, “I’m so sorry.” </p><p>The Azgeda representative stepped forwards, “You should have never moved your people back into Mount Weather. The Ice Nation did what Lexa was too weak to do.” </p><p>Lexa stepped down from by her throne, “This is an act of war,” she spat. “Sentries? Arrest the Ice Nation delegation. Including the prince.” The sentries sprung to action and began to move the Azgeda representatives down to the dungeons. I turned to Bellamy, but he was keeping it together long enough to get Clarke. </p><p>“Clarke, we need to leave now,” he whispered. </p><p>“We need an ambassador from the thirteenth clan to stay here in Polis,” Lexa stopped him.</p><p>“It’s not safe here,” Bellamy protested. </p><p>Lexa reassured him, “Clarke will be safe here under my protection.” </p><p>I grabbed his shoulder, “I think this might be the only place she is <em> guaranteed </em> to be safe. We have to go, now.” </p><p>“I have to stay,” Clarke told him. </p><p>He shrugged me off and took a step towards her. “She left us to die on that mountain. She will <em> always </em> put her people first. You should come home to yours.” </p><p>“I’m sorry,” she replied. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The title comes from the song "Love" by Imagine Dragons.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. Trouble Is Closing In</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Are you okay?"</p><p>"Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim, am I right?"</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>The entire section of italics is what is happening on the other table while Alyssa is eavesdropping/lip reading, and the breaks of non-italicised text is her responses to their conversation.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I was hovering on watch with my earbuds in when I noticed the commotion at the gate, soon followed by the announcement for all security personnel to convene there. A group of Grounders were trying to come in and The Guard didn’t seem too keen on it. I jumped down from my position and made my way over, arriving just after Octavia. </p><p>“What the hell is going on?” I looked around, recognising Nyko in the group. “Get off them.” </p><p>“No weapons, everybody check them!” One of the guards ordered and I pushed him out of the way to see what was happening. Another guard pulled a woman to the side and she all but collapsed against the wall. </p><p>Nyko stepped forwards, tearing the guard away from his friend, “Leave them alone. They’re sick.” </p><p>“That’s enough, stop it,” Octavia warned the other guards. “The Chancellor told Nyko that we would help.” </p><p>“You’re one of them,” the guard spat at her, “You take them in.” </p><p>I rolled my eyes, “The sooner that you get the fact that there is no ‘us’ against ‘them’ into your little head, the better. Back off.” </p><p>“Is that a threat?” The man laughed. </p><p>I snapped, “You better hope not. Usually, when I threaten someone I follow through on it,” finishing with an angelic smile as I pulled the half-conscious woman’s arm over my shoulder to support her. Octavia did the same with one of the others and we led them towards medical. </p><p>“I heard about Mount Weather, I’m sorry,” Nyko whispered sympathetically. </p><p>“There’s a memorial today, once I’ve helped you guys I’m going straight there,” I explained. </p><p>~</p><p>I was ever so slightly late, the injured Grounders taking up more time than I anticipated, but they weren’t too far in for me to be able to slide in at the back and take the chair next to Bellamy’s resting a hand on his shoulder comfortingly. “Sorry I’m late,” I whispered, “I was helping at medical.” </p><p>He didn’t reply, but instead reached his hand up to where mine was placed on his shoulder and placed it over it. Pike stood at the front, leading the ceremony and even though I had my doubts about that man, he was the best person for it. Most of the people who had died had been Farm Station, and I know he knew them all individually and very well.</p><p>“Who will speak for Iris Jones?” He asked, looking about the room. Bryan, Miller’s boyfriend, stood up and walked to the front, passing a small switchblade between his hands. </p><p>“Iris was strong, good with a knife. She saved my life. I’m just sorry I couldn’t do the same for her,” he flicked the blade out, resting it on the table before walking back to his seat next to Miller. </p><p>Pike returned to the centre, “We will miss Iris, may we meet again.” </p><p>The room echoed him, “May we meet again.”</p><p>“Who will speak for Gina Martin?” </p><p>I gave Bellamy one last reassuring squeeze before he stood up, the book that Gina had given him not that long ago clasped in his hand. He walked to the front, turning to face everyone. “Gina was real. She always saw the light, even here. She deserved better. May we meet again.” He placed the book on the table and turned back around.</p><p>“May we meet again,” I echoed, but it seemed I was the only one to do so as a large portion of The Guard marched in and disrupted the ceremony. I could hear their hushed voices over the murmurs of the crowd and Bellamy was left at the front, hesitating about whether to come back or not. Ignoring the interruption, I thought of Gina and whispered, <em> “Yu gonplei ste odon,” </em> and earned myself a few stares from some of the remainder of Farm Station. It didn’t matter what they thought, I was glad I had said it. </p><p>“Are we under attack?” Someone called out, having been listening in to the disturbance. </p><p>“No, we are <em> not </em> under attack,” Kane stressed. “The Commander sent a peacekeeping force to ensure that we can defend against any oncoming attacks from the Ice Nation.”  </p><p>Pike scoffed, “Peacekeeping force? Even you can’t be that naïve, Marcus.” </p><p>“Watch your tongue,” Abby snapped. “You’re talking to the next Chancellor. We’re all grieving. This has been hard on all of us, but we can’t let anger drive our policy!”</p><p>“Anger <em> is </em> our policy!” Pike expressed. “Now if they’re here to defend us, and you say, then tell them to go home! We can defend ourselves.” </p><p>This was not how the memorial was supposed to go. One of the members of Farm Station stood up and pointed at Lincoln, who had been hovering at the back. “You. You don’t belong here. He’s one of them.” </p><p>There was a chorus of approval in response and I stood up protectively, even though I knew Lincoln didn’t in any way need my protection. He was my friend, and I’ll be damned if I let anyone talk shit about him. “My boy is dead!” Someone shouted, throwing something at Lincoln’s head. I shot forwards, grabbing the nearest person who ran at him and shoving them backwards. Bellamy was by my side within seconds and wrestling with another anti-Grounder who tried to attack Lincoln. </p><p>The room descended into chaos and I’m pretty sure even after receiving a blow to the side of the head, I took a few down with me, pausing to lean on a chair for support before diving back into the disarray and pulling two others apart, holding them as far as I could either side of me. Pike whistled and the room fell silent. “That’s enough! We do not attack our own. Fighting each other only makes us <em> weak. </em> The enemy is not in this camp. The enemy is out there.” </p><p>Abby rushed forwards, “Lincoln, are you okay? You need to go to medical.” </p><p>“I’m fine,” he shook his head, slightly dazed as he walked off. I would have followed had I not been overwhelmed by a small bout of dizziness which I managed to shake off, leaning against one of the nearby chairs once more. </p><p>Kane hovered, checking over the injured. After looking at a few others, he worked his way over to me. “Are you okay?” He put a hand under my elbow to steady me and I laughed, wiping my forehead with my other arm. </p><p><em> “Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim, </em> am I right?” <em>Get knocked down, get back up. </em>If that isn’t how I roll then I don’t know what is. I walked back to my room, lying down on the bed for a little while. I sighed, leaning back and looking at the ceiling before making my decision. </p><p>Fuck this, I need a drink.</p><p>~</p><p>I grabbed some shots from the bar and was about to make my way over to where I saw Bellamy was sitting, but before I had the chance Pike sat down opposite him. My eyebrows raised, nothing Pike was planning was ever going to help anyone other than himself. Instead of joining them, since Pike knows I’m very much opposed to his views, I took a table slightly further away and tried to read their lips. </p><p>Downing the first shot, I concentrated. </p><p>
  <em> “Let’s talk about Mount Weather,” Pike announced. “I know you think it was your fault. That why you resigned?” Bellamy picked up his drink, nodding. “You’re right. It was your fault…”  </em>
</p><p>It took all I had not to storm over there and slap him around the face. It wasn’t hard to see that since yesterday, Bellamy had been completely beating himself up over what had happened. What the hell was Pike playing at?</p><p>
  <em> “Mine too. Every life we honoured at the memorial was lost because we trusted a Grounder.” Pike explained.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I talked you into it,” Bellamy replied. “I knew her and I vouched for her.”  </em>
</p><p><em> “No. You don’t get to own this one alone.” </em> The bartender came over and replaced their drinks with fresh ones, obscuring my vision momentarily. <em> “I knew what they were capable of, but I let my guard down one day and thirty-five of my people died.” Pike raised his glass. “Never again.” </em></p><p>
  <em> “Never again,” Bellamy did the same.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Kane’s a good man, I know you’re close to him,” Pike stated, “But he doesn’t believe we’re fighting a war. He thinks Grounders can police Grounders. I mean, out there in the woods outside our home with a peacekeeping force?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Bellamy hesitated, “What would you do?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “What I wouldn’t do… is wait for them to hit us. My scouts tell me that they’ve got three hundred soldiers and not a single gun between them. Ten highly motivated men with automatic rifles is all it would take. I’ve got the men.” Pike looked around and Bellamy followed his gaze. </em>
</p><p>And I realised everyone else in the bar apart from myself was Farm Station, and they looked ready for a war. </p><p>
  <em> “You’re asking me to get you the guns.” Bellamy finished. “That’s treason.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “That’s survival.” </em>
</p><p>Nope, I’m pretty sure that’s treason. </p><p>
  <em> “The Grounders out there could attack this camp and our leaders do nothing. Right now we have the element of surprise. We wait, we die. If they want to call it treason, I’m willing to suffer the consequences to save our people. Are you?” </em>
</p><p>Damn, Pike. Are you really playing the <em> patriot </em> card? I watched in horror as Bellamy nodded. How the hell am I supposed to talk him out of this one? Knowing I’d heard enough, and wanting to leave before any of the other Farm Station members noticed the look on my face that indicated I’d been listening, I made a swift exit back to my room to plan. </p><p>I spun a knife between my fingers as I paced, trying to figure out what to do. The way I saw it, there are four options, each with deadly consequences. </p>
<ol>
<li>Tell Kane in advance, therefore sparing the warriors outside the gate, but potentially get Pike, Bellamy and half of Farm Station executed for treason.</li>
<li>Try and convince Bellamy to back out, but he’s stubborn and even though he wouldn’t snitch on me to Pike, the massacre that is undoubtedly going to happen would still take place. </li>
<li>Sneak out and warn Indra, but that means that her army would be prepared and the ten guards sent to kill them would definitely end up strung up on stakes to be sliced at by each member of Trikru. </li>
<li>Sneak out at the same time as the guards and attack them before they get to the sleeping army. </li>
</ol><p>I lost my train of thought and the knife slipped, slicing the palm of my hand. I cursed, throwing it at the wall and tearing a piece of fabric from an old tee to wrap around the shallow wound. <em> Dammit! </em> My fist froze inches from the wall but I hesitated, bringing it back down and uncurling it to lay my hand flat against the table instead. Now was not the time for anger. Now was the time for common sense and hard decisions. </p><p>Neither of which I was very good at. </p><p>Night fell upon Arkadia and I had to act fast. I ran to Abby’s office and found her talking to Kane. I looked out the window and saw the guards moving towards the gate, Lincoln, Monroe and Harper the only people in their path. If we were lucky, no one had to die tonight, not if I caught them in time. I burst through the door and Abby jumped. </p><p>“No time for pleasantries, we have a big problem.” </p><p>“What’s happening?” Kane stood up. </p><p>“Pike is about to declare war on the Grounders and you need to stop him <em> now. </em>” </p><p>~</p><p>On the way, we met Octavia and I pulled her with us. “What’s going on?” She asked me. </p><p>“O, your brother is in deep shit,” I hissed while we walked. Abby gave out the order to send all available personnel to the gate to prevent the attack and when we arrived I wasn’t as shocked as I should have been to see Lincoln holding one of the guards, a knife against his throat. Octavia moved to stand beside him and I took his other side, facing the anti-Grounder army. </p><p>When the rest of the cavalry arrived, Pike conceded and ordered everyone to place their guns on the ground. Kane stood at the front next to Abby, “Lincoln, it’s alright. Let him go,” he advised as the Farm Station workers placed their guns on the ground. </p><p>“What the hell are you trying to do?” Abby faced Pike.</p><p>“What you didn’t have the guts to do,” he snapped back. </p><p>Kane walked over to Bellamy, his voice low. “Did you arm these people?” Bellamy stayed silent and I groaned inwardly in response. </p><p>“Guards, take them to lockup now,” Abby ordered as the guards came forward to cuff all of them. “It’s over.” </p><p>Pike turned around before he was led away, “Nothing is over. We are surrounded by warriors who want us dead.”</p><p>“No,” I cut in. “We’re surrounded by warriors <em> protecting </em>us from those who want us dead.” </p><p>“How can you trust them?” </p><p>“That’s enough,” Kane stepped in, attempting to diffuse the situation. </p><p>“No it isn’t,” Pike scoffed. “Not even close. Why don’t you show us all what you let the Grounders do to you yesterday? Come on Kane,” he goaded, “I think that the people who are about to vote for you have a right to know.” </p><p>Kane pulled up his sleeve to reveal the mark, holding his arm up to show everyone. “It is the mark of the Commander’s Coalition. It means we are the thirteenth clan. It means we are in this fight together.” </p><p>“No. It’s what farmers used to do to their livestock.” Pike retorted, and his remark was followed by calls of “I ain’t no Grounder,” and “Pike for Chancellor!” </p><p>If Pike became Chancellor, <em> nothing </em> could save us. “Sir,” another man stepped forwards, “You should be on the ballot tomorrow.” </p><p>“That’s enough,” Abby stopped them. “Take him away.” </p><p>“Pike! Pike!” Bellamy started, and the crowd echoed him, chanting Pike’s name as he was led away. I grabbed him, pulling him to the side. </p><p>“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” I hissed, trying to talk some sense into him. </p><p>He shrugged me off, “What’s best for my people.” </p><p>“Tell me,” I laughed, “If we’d never found Farm Station, would you think the same? If Ice Nation hadn’t blown up Mount Weather, because they moved in, would you still think that? If Gina was still alive, would you really be doing what you’re doing now?” </p><p>Bellamy froze as if he hadn’t been expecting the attack from me. </p><p>I narrowed my eyes at him, “Yeah. That’s what I thought. You are going to get yourself killed trying to start this goddamn war!”</p><p>“We’re already at war,” he seemed to have finally found his voice. </p><p>“Well when you do declare war on our <em> allies</em>,” I spat, “Don’t expect me to have your back. I only look out for people I trust, and right now I don’t know who you are, but it’s not the Bellamy Blake I came to the ground with.” I gave him a shove, tipping him backwards slightly before storming off, not even turning around to see him be led away with handcuffs on. For the second time in two days, I sighed to myself.</p><p>
  <em> We are well and truly fucked. </em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Chapter title comes from the song "Sound Off The Sirens" by Sam Tinnesz.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Darkness Gonna Break Your Light</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"What the hell is going on?"</p><p>"Just some good old arrests for innocent people. Oh, and your brother is Pike's bitch."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Kane lost the ballot. Pike is now Chancellor. <em> Float me now. </em> And they were going back out to finish what they started. <em> Tonight. </em></p><p>To hell with treason. </p><p>To hell with Pike.</p><p>To hell with Bellamy Blake. </p><p>I pulled on my jacket and kicked out the loose piece of metal in the fence that Jasper had shown me two months earlier, sliding through and making my way down the hill towards the sleeping army. They could kill me if they wanted to. I’d like to see them try, but I couldn’t let this happen. Lincoln put up a fight but he was forced out of the way. </p><p>It was the early hours of the morning and normally I wouldn’t get up this early even for a watch, but as I waited for them to come out of the gate I held my breath and knew that I had made my decision. I didn’t want to have to kill them, but if they gave me no choice then I knew what I had to do. Wiping my forehead with the back of my hand, I stood up. They had taken charge of all of the guns apart from those for the on-duty guards, so all I had was my knives. It was only just a fair fight and they could shoot me if they wanted to but I didn’t really care at this point. </p><p>The army outside the gate was there for our <em> protection. </em>They were here to help us. And Pike was here to slaughter them. I waited until they were as close to me as possible before shooting up and throwing a knife at one of the armed guards, hedging my bets that they wouldn’t shoot yet, not unless they were willing to wake up the sleeping army. The knife hit the man’s shoulder but didn’t take him down, merely slowing him and pushing him back slightly from the impact. </p><p>Bellamy spotted the knife and I watched recognition flash across his face before he turned to Pike, “If they know we’re here then we’re outnumbered. If we lose the element of surprise then everyone on this team will die.” </p><p>“It’s probably a scout, they seem to be alone. Hold your fire, we should find them before they have a chance to warn the others,” Pike ordered, and two of the soldiers split from the group and walked towards where I had ducked back down. </p><p>One of them spotted me and I swiped his legs out from under him, but I was too slow to avoid the oncoming attack from the other. He pulled me to my feet and I elbowed him in the ribs, trying to work my way free as he cuffed me. “I got her, Sir. It’s one of our lot.” </p><p>He pulled me up to Pike, holding me in front of him so I could make eye contact with our <em> beloved </em> Chancellor. Once I was close enough I spat in his face, glaring at him. </p><p>“We appear to have a traitor in our midst,” he didn’t seem surprised. “Good job on restraining her, Lacroix. She’s a slippery one. Miss Jones, you are aware that this is treason?” </p><p>“Bite me,” I hissed. </p><p>Bellamy shot me a look that told me to keep quiet, but I ignored it. He stepped forward, “Alyssa, what are you doing here?” </p><p>“Same as you,” I scoffed, “Doing what I think is right for my people.” </p><p>Pike narrowed his eyes at me, before looking at the man behind me and giving him orders. “Stay here with her, we’ll be back. Gag her to make sure she doesn’t alert the army.” </p><p>Despite knowing me oh-so-well, Bellamy refrained from telling Pike about my large stash of weapons, which I thought was very odd. I thought I had made it <em> very </em> clear that we were no longer on the same side, so there was no need for him to try and protect me. Either way, I wasn’t going to rush to reveal the fact that I was very well armed, not yet. Pike knew that I usually had a stash of knives on me, but I had placed two or three in very obvious positions, so Lacroix removed them and tossed them to the ground. </p><p>Instead of having a knife up my sleeve, this time I had a hairpin and as soon as the guards began to move towards the army, I slid it out, already having prepared by bending it into the right shape. I didn’t know how to pick locks when I first got to the ground, but Miller showed me on camp one night and I’ve been very grateful for it ever since. I slid the pin into the keyhole and twisted it, jiggling it around until I felt the bolt release. I held the cuffs in place with one hand while I slid the pin back into the lining of my jacket sleeve.</p><p>Moving quickly I headbutted Lacroix and twisted around, securing the cuffs around his wrists and jamming my hand over his mouth. “You shout, and they all get killed by the sleeping army, so do as you wish,” I hissed before setting off after them. </p><p>I wasn’t wrong. It was a bloodbath. I spotted Indra trying to fend off two of the guards but one of them put a bullet in her and she fell to the ground, clutching the wound as blood seeped slowly through her fingers. I knelt down next to her, “I’m not with them, I didn’t want this to happen. Clarke has no idea and Octavia tried to fight this. Kane is no longer in charge and Pike wants vengeance for the Mount Weather attack,” I explained quickly, tearing off a piece of my shirt for her to hold against her wound. “Shit,” I dodged a bullet. “This was never supposed to happen.” </p><p>Spotting Pike as he executed someone else, I ran for him, throwing a knife which lodged in the back of his armour, only just going through. I cursed, damn whoever made the gear so good. He turned around but I was still running at him and I tackled him. There were barely any Grounders left alive and the others were finishing them off, blood splattering their jackets. </p><p>Pike threw me off of him, having a size advantage and I rolled back over, getting to my feet as I realised he was holding me at gunpoint. Then again, using Lacroix’s gun, I was doing the same to him. He aimed his weapon at me and I refused to let myself show any sign of weakness. I didn’t raise my arms in surrender, or beg for my life. I stood there unmoving. One carefully aimed bullet. The question was, would my shot hit its mark before his? Maybe not. Would it be worth it? One hundred per cent. </p><p>I held the weapon up, my precision flawless as always. I prepared to pull the trigger when I felt the cold barrel of a gun resting against my head. </p><p>“Don’t do this,” Bellamy whispered. </p><p>“I could say the same to you, but I won’t,” I remarked. “Go on, shoot me. I’ve committed treason, isn’t execution the punishment? Do it. I dare you.” </p><p>He didn’t move. </p><p>“It’s funny,” I began. “This reminds me of you telling me that you shot Chancellor Jaha. Only in this case, <em> I won’t miss.</em>” </p><p>Bellamy watched my finger tighten on the trigger as he tackled me to the ground, the gun against my head lost in the confusion. Pike stayed where he was as Bellamy pinned me to the ground, securing my hands above my head before pulling me to my feet. </p><p>I smiled, turning to Pike and looking at his eyes instead of at the gun trained on my head. “What was it you said yesterday? We do not attack our own.” </p><p>“You already did,” he replied, pulling the trigger. </p><p>He had moved the gun further down and the bullet tore through my leg just above the knee. I dropped to the ground, squeezing my eyes shut through the pain and trying to ignore the tears building. Pushing my hands to the ground, I put my good leg forward and tried to stand, ignoring the blood as it soaked through my trousers. <em> “Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim,” </em> I spat, glaring back up at him. </p><p>Pike turned to Bellamy expectantly. “It means get knocked down, get back up, Sir.” </p><p>“Damn right it does,” I smiled sickly. </p><p>“What about this one?” One of the other soldiers called, and when I turned I realised he was pointing a gun at Indra. “And the rest of the wounded?” </p><p>“Sir, I think we should spare the wounded.” Bellamy protested. </p><p>Pike nodded, “No. Kill the rest, leave her, she can pass on the message that Skaikru rejects the coalition.” he ordered the others. “This is our land now! They can leave or they can die. Now pull the traitor to her feet and she can spend her final days in medical before her execution.” </p><p>Bellamy hauled me to my feet yet again and I let him hold me up, but only because I wouldn’t be getting back to camp if he didn’t. I turned to look at him, my eyes like daggers. “Still think you’re on the right side of this war, Blake?” </p><p>~</p><p>I woke up in medical with my hand cuffed to the bed. Abby was at the other end of the room and Jackson was tending to the sick Grounders that Nyko had brought in. I inspected my wound. Someone had taken out the bullet and stitched it up, and put a bandage around my knee. </p><p>Jackson came over, “You’re awake, that’s good.” He checked my blood pressure. “I thought I said I didn’t want to see you in here any time soon?” </p><p>“Plans change,” I shrugged. “How badass is my scar going to look?” </p><p>He shot me a look. “You committed treason, Alyssa.” </p><p>“If Pike wants to force me to kneel in front of him so he can shoot me in the head, let him at it. But he’s got to wait until I can actually kneel first, if he has any shred of decency left in him. How long until I can leave?” </p><p>“You’re not going anywhere any time soon. You also lost a lot of blood, Bellamy had to donate some to help with your recovery since you share the same type,” Jackson explained. </p><p>“Bellamy was here? I figured he’d feel guilty about what happened,” I laughed. “I suppose that’s his way of making it up to me. Anyway…” I changed the topic, “Back to the scar. Badass or boring?” </p><p>“It’s not as ‘badass’ as the scar you have on your back, how’d you get that one?” He asked, and I smiled at remembering the ‘sneak attack concealed sling knife’ that accompanied my injury. </p><p>“I got mauled by a scaly black panther while out hunting for food after our meat supply hut burnt down,” I told him with a shrug. “One of the other kids speared it before it could take a chunk out of me though.” I paused. Sneak attack concealed sling knife. <em>Knife.</em> <em>Jacket.</em> “Jackson, where’s my jacket?” I looked around. “And my boots. And <em>all of my knives?</em>” </p><p>He hesitated before revealing, “Bellamy took them. Back to your room I think.” </p><p>“Dammit!” I slammed my hand down on the bed. For the first time in a long time, I was completely unarmed. “Screw him!” I pulled on the cuffs but they held and I sighed. </p><p>Jackson grabbed my hand and held it steady. “Trust me when I say this, you do not want to go out there. Pike wants you dead, and he will execute you. As long as you're in medical, you’re safe. And the guards outside the door have been told not to let your dad in as well. Unless he is explicitly injured, of course.” </p><p>“There are guards outside?” I asked, surprised. </p><p>“Yes, to make sure nothing happens to the injured Grounders in our care.”</p><p>“That’s good,” I nodded. </p><p>Raven burst in, and she clearly wasn’t very impressed. “What the hell, Abby?” </p><p>“Calm down,” Abby warned. “I know that you’re upset.” </p><p>“Upset? I just showed up for work and found out you <em> fired </em> me,” she shouted.</p><p>Abby tried to play peacekeeper, “I don’t fire people.” </p><p>“Not clearing me medically is the same damn thing.”</p><p>“Come on, let’s go sit down,” Abby advised cautiously.</p><p>Raven stepped back, anger radiating from her, “No. I don’t need to sit down. My leg is fine.” </p><p>“No it’s not,” Abby said calmly. “And riding a patrol and working that wall are making your conditions worse.”</p><p>“So what, do nothing?” Raven demanded, her eyes turning misty. “That’s gonna make my leg heal?” </p><p>“No your leg is never going to heal. Our goal is pain reduction. That’s it— and if you keep pushing this hard, even that’s not gonna happen. You can still be useful.” </p><p>Raven glared at her and turned around, ready to leave, but she caught my eye before she could. Ignoring Abby, she walked over. “I heard what happened, Pike shot you?” Her anger didn’t lessen, but it changed its course and was more fuelled towards Pike instead. </p><p>“Yeah, I committed treason so he shot me in the leg, and when I leave medical he’s going to order a public execution, so that’s fun,” I sighed. “I overheard that shitshow, how’s your leg holding up?” </p><p>She sighed, “My leg is fine.” </p><p>“Raven.” </p><p>Her voice dropped quieter, “It hurts a little, but it’s fine,” before changing the subject. “How is <em> your </em> leg holding up?”</p><p>“Just about,” I laughed. “What’s happening out there? Has Pike done anything else?” </p><p>“Not that I know of. He gave a speech about taking back our land from the Grounders, but he hasn’t done anything else drastic yet.” </p><p>Someone came running in, “We need a medic at the gate! Jaha’s back and someone’s been shot!” </p><p>Abby set off at a run with a pack of supplies and I raised my eyebrows. After all this, apparently, people can still surprise me. </p><p>~</p><p>I woke up to a commotion in medical and realised that I must have dozed off not long after Raven left. Pike and Bellamy watched from the sides as Abby protested. “What are you doing? These are sick people, you can’t just throw them out into the cold!” One by one the sick and injured Grounders were ripped from their beds. </p><p>“We’re not. They’re being interned,” Pike replied coldly. </p><p>“What?” Abby gasped, shocked. </p><p>Lincoln burst in, “Out of my way!” </p><p>“Lincoln, you don’t want to be here right now,” Bellamy tried to reason with him. </p><p>I shot a look at Jackson but he shook his head and mouthed something. I couldn’t quite work out what exactly he’d said, but I realised the gist of it and faked sleep, listening only. </p><p>“We asked them to come here,” Lincoln whispered. </p><p>Pike answered without a trace of emotion, “We can’t spare the supplies.” </p><p>“Denae,” I heard footsteps as Lincoln moved towards his friend, accompanied by the sound of a shock baton being pulled from its holster. </p><p>“Lincoln, no,” Abby warned. </p><p>“She is too sick to move,” Lincoln growled. </p><p>“Looks like she’s moving fine to me,” another man shot back. </p><p>I heard light footsteps move forwards and I realised that I recognised the gait as Bellamy’s. “Gillmer, back off,” he ordered, before walking away. “Jackson, why did you bring him here?” </p><p>Someone sighed and I heard something hit the floor, realising that Denae must have collapsed. I opened my eyes slightly to see Lincoln go to her, only to have Gillmer attack him. Lincoln threw a punch and the two wrestled. Bellamy ran over to pull them apart and got the tail end of one of the punches, causing him to back off. </p><p>Bellamy scrambled to his feet as Lincoln advanced on him, wearing a cold look. </p><p>“Lincoln,” Abby tried to get his attention. “Lincoln!” </p><p>He turned around and I followed Abby’s gaze to Denae, who was huddled on the floor with Pike’s pistol barely an inch away from her shivering head. Lincoln conceded, not wanting his friend to be hurt. </p><p>“He goes with them,” Pike ordered. “Take him.” Two of the guards pulled Lincoln’s hands behind his back. His eyes strayed to me, and I fluttered mine closed and open to make it look like I was just waking up, since it was obvious I had been listening. </p><p>Jackson stepped in front of my bed, “She can’t move. You made sure of that when you shot her… Sir.” </p><p>Pike shook his head, “She goes with the rest of them.” </p><p>“What?” Abby spluttered, shocked. “I still need to monitor her. And her leg needs to stay raised to reduce the swelling and soon we need to start physical therapy to ensure that she can walk again.” </p><p>“If she can walk, it’ll only be from here to her deathbed,” one of the other soldiers remarked and I was surprised to notice Bellamy’s hand curl into a fist by his side. </p><p>“That’s enough. Abby, you can do all of those things with her inside a cell with the rest of them,” Pike reassured her calmly, although it didn’t do much to stop Abby’s complaints. “Wheel her there on the bed, put her on the ground, and then bring the bed back.” </p><p>“Can I at least have my jacket? From personal experience I know it’s pretty cold in lockup thanks to the hole in the wall at the back that lets all the heat out,” I thought back to being arrested the first time on the ground, back when it was Camp Jaha. </p><p>“We’ll get you a blanket,” Bellamy replied. “Your jacket can stay in the room, but I’ll bring your boots at least in case you need them.” </p><p>The remaining two men began to wheel my bed along to the cell, following the other Grounders and Lincoln. Octavia appeared but Bellamy held her back as she tried to call out to him. “Lincoln, Lincoln!” </p><p>“I’m okay,” he told her, “Don’t fight this.” </p><p>“He’s right,” Bellamy said to his sister, holding her arm to stop her from going any further. She paused when she saw me, having to move out of the way to let my bed past. </p><p>“What the hell is going on?” She asked me, her eyes filled with worry. </p><p>I laughed, “Just some good old arrests for innocent people. Oh, and your brother is Pike’s bitch.” Bellamy shot me a look but I flipped him the bird from my bed in response. “What are you gonna do, Blake? I taunted, “Shoot me?” I mimed putting a gun to my own head and blowing my brains out as they wheeled me around the corridor. </p><p>I was lifted from the bed and onto the floor, propped up by pillows with more underneath my leg to keep it elevated. Lincoln began to pace and I watched as one of the other Grounders tried to make his friend drink a little water. </p><p>~</p><p>Miller appeared and watched as Lincoln paced, warning the other guard, “Watch out. This one doesn’t like to be chained up. Girlfriend’s not here to free you this time.” </p><p>“Hey Miller,” I shouted. “Thanks for teaching me how to pick locks! Comes in <em> really </em> handy.” I shot him finger guns with my two recently freed hands, using a piece of scrap metal I’d found on the floor. </p><p>His face softened slightly when he realised it was me, “What the hell are you doing here?” </p><p>“Treason, didn’t you hear?” I laughed, “Oh and don’t worry, I thought it through completely.”</p><p>Miller rolled his eyes, “If you had, then you wouldn’t have committed treason.” </p><p>“Nope, some of us are actually willing to fight for our people, no matter the consequences,” I whistled, “Then again, you probably think that’s exactly what you’re doing.” </p><p>Lincoln walked towards where Miller was standing, pausing once the door was the only thing separating them. Miller lifted the grate and passed in a box of pills. “It’s from Abby for Denae,” he whispered. </p><p>“Octavia?” Lincoln asked hopefully.</p><p>“She got out with Clarke,” Miller whispered back. </p><p>“Lyssa,” Miller hissed, “I’ll try and see if they’ve got any pain meds for your leg.” He was cut short as the other guard returned, but I smiled. I guess some of them really were only <em> acting </em> like they enjoyed Pike’s rule. It was hard to tell who was pretending and who wasn’t but at least they weren’t all comfortable with him in charge, and that’s the best way to bring him down.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Chapter title from the song "Missile" by Dorothy.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Blood, Sweat and Tears</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"You need to sleep if you want to heal." </p><p>"I’ve lost track of the amount of times people have told me that.” </p><p>“That’s not a good thing, Alyssa.” </p><p>“I know.”</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>A hell of a lot of italicised flashbacks for a rather unfortunate Alyssa.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>I tried to sleep, but sleep wouldn’t come. The background noise in the cell wasn’t much, but it wasn’t the problem. I had been keeping myself busy for the past week, ignoring the problems and using any spare time I had for productive things. But now, spare time was all I had. The time left me thinking, about Astrid, about my father, about all the feelings I had managed to bury. All the <em> fears </em> I had conquered with the help of my friends that were now nowhere in sight. I thought I was strong enough.</p><p>I wasn’t. </p><p>I stopped trying to sleep after the first night, waking up with a start in a fit of rage and fear that had caused me to throw a small piece of metal across the room. It hit the wall with a clang and the guards turned around, trying to find the source of the sound. I felt almost guilty, it seemed to have woken up one or two of the sick Grounders. </p><p>I had tried to stop the slaughter of Indra’s army. But I had been too late, too <em> weak. </em> What was it my dad said during that jobi nut induced hallucination? Oh yeah, <em> people die when you’re around. </em> It was true. They did. Now there was no point in trying to sleep because I was plagued with the same nightmares, the same fears, the same worries that despite all of my tries… nothing would ever stop the blood from spreading. </p><p>All the time I had was spent revisiting old memories, whether they were triggered by words, faces, or names. I remembered when everyone got sick, when <em>I</em> got sick. </p><p>
  <em> “You need to rest, Alyssa. It’s the only way you’ll get better,” Murphy advised. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I laughed, but the sound that came out resembled less a laugh, more of an animal getting shot. “I’ll sleep when I’m dead.”  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “If you don’t sleep, you will be dead,” urged Murphy.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “That’s unfortunate then.” </em>
</p><p>I had the same fears then that I had now. The only difference was, there was no Murphy to convince me, and no Bellamy to tell me how to <em> slay my demons. </em></p><p>
  <em> Bellamy nodded. “I get it.” He put an arm around me and I leant into him. “But there’s a difference between getting killed and simply letting yourself die. And if you hide from the fear then you can’t beat it, and you’re letting this sickness kill you. You said it yourself, you’re willing to fight for your life. So fight.”  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “I can’t fight the Grounders if I’m asleep,” I moaned, tilting my head back against the wall.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Can’t fight the Grounders if you’re sick,” Bellamy countered. “Or dead,” He added.  </em>
</p><p>Where was he now? Oh yeah, Pike’s little lackey. “I’m doing what’s best for my people”, my ass. If he was doing what’s best for us, he wouldn’t be declaring war. <em> There was no point arguing</em>, I told myself. It changes nothing. </p><p>After the third night with zero sleep, Lincoln noticed. He came over and checked my wound. Jackson had come in earlier to change the bandages again and Miller had sneaked me some pain medication, but all the meds did was make me tired, and tired was exactly what I didn’t want to be. I took the pills anyway, relieving the leg pain, and kept my hand tapping on my good leg in a steady rhythm for something to focus on. </p><p>“How are you feeling?” Lincoln whispered.</p><p><em>"Ai gonplei nou ste odon,” </em> I replied. <em> My fight isn’t over. </em></p><p>He smiled, but it was tainted with concern. “That’s not an answer.” </p><p>“Then I don’t have an answer,” I told him as I leant my head back against the wall. </p><p>“You haven’t been sleeping,” he noticed.</p><p>I shrugged, “Haven’t wanted to.” </p><p>“You need to sleep if you want to heal,” Lincoln advised me. </p><p>I laughed, “I’ve lost track of the amount of times people have told me that.” </p><p>“That’s not a good thing, Alyssa.” </p><p>“I know.” </p><p>~</p><p>
  <em> “No!” Tears streamed down my face. “No. He was a monster.”  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “You’re the monster.”  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “No!” I charged at him, but he caught me and pushed me onto the ground. I took a breath, I tried again. This time I tried to land a punch but the moment my fist made contact with him, something I’d wanted to do for a long time, pain exploded through it like I had hit a brick wall. Staggering backwards, I clutched my fist with my other hand as I tripped over a tree root and fell to the ground.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> My dad took another step forward, “This all started when you were born. You were a strain on resources and on your mother and I. If you didn’t exist she would still be alive.”  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Tears streamed down my face, “I had to kill him. For her.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “You can’t use her to justify your selfishness. Not this time. Not here.” </em>
</p><p>My eyes fluttered open before I was forced again to watch the memory inside of the memory. I groaned, trying to fight the tears welling up in my eyes. Not this. Not again. I looked over to the guards stationed outside and realised one of them was Miller. I staggered to my feet, trying to make my way over but I stumbled and fell the moment I put weight on my injured leg, the sound waking up everyone else. </p><p>Miller turned around, nodding to the other guard who let him in so that he could help Lincoln put me back on the makeshift bed. I grabbed him, whispering. “There’s something in my jacket, I need you to get it for me, please.” </p><p>“I can’t bring you any knives, Lyss,” he hissed back. </p><p>I shook my head, “Not knives, MP3 player. <em> Please</em>, I need it. My room is locked but that won’t be an issue. <em> Please</em>, Miller.” </p><p>He sighed, “I’ll do my best, and I’ll make sure Abby and Jackson can visit you more often to check-in.” </p><p>“Thank you,” I whispered, squeezing my eyes tightly shut to stop the tears before they could fall. Miller left the cell and resumed his place at his post until the end of his duty. Once his shift was over, I prayed that he was going to my room. Exhausted, I tried my hardest to stay awake, but the effort of trying to move on my injured leg had completely drained me and no matter how much I fought it, I fell asleep again. </p><p>~</p><p>
  <em> She opened the door and walked in, fifteen but with bags under her eyes that seemed to have lived decades. She came in and dropped the bag of rations onto the table. “Mom? I’m back, did you miss me?” The little girl yawned and opened the bathroom door, instantly falling to her knees. “Mom? Mom, what did you do?” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> What did you do? </em>
</p><p>I jolted awake in a cold sweat for the second time, hitting my forehead with the palm of my hand to scold myself for letting it get this bad again. No matter how much I tried to deny it, it was worse this time. I realised Lincoln was awake and he sent me a reassuring look from where he was sitting by Denae. </p><p>Three quick raps on the door caused me to look up and it was Miller. He slid the small device through the hatch and shut it afterwards during the guard changeover and nodded at Lincoln to grab it for me. “Thank you,” I mouthed and he nodded, making a quick getaway. </p><p>Lincoln grabbed it and handed it to me, hiding it under the blanket I’d been giving from Jackson. I was ready to put the earbuds in but as if he knew I was thinking about him, Jackson arrived. The guard stationed there unlocked the door and he checked on the Grounder patients first before coming over to me and changing my bandages. </p><p>“It’s looking better, but no chance of you walking yet. You don’t look like you’ve been sleeping?” It was a comment that was phrased more like a question, like he wanted an explanation for <em> why </em> rather than a yes or no answer of whether I had been sleeping or not. </p><p>“Nightmares,” I told him. </p><p>He smiled apologetically, “You did get shot, it’s only natural.” </p><p>I laughed loudly and unexpectedly, taking myself and Jackson by surprise, “No… my trauma is <em> way </em> more deep-rooted than the gunshot wound. This shit goes back <em> years.</em>”</p><p>This time Jackson nodded understandably before checking Lincoln’s head wound from the fight at the memorial. I leant my head against the wall and took a deep breath, pulling the blanket up and around my shoulders to hide the fact that I had threaded one of the earphones through my right sleeve. I rested my head on my upright hand and used my other hand to press play. </p><p><em> Use Somebody </em> by Kings of Leon began playing and I was reminded of the first time I’d heard it. It was playing while I was in the woods the day I met Astrid, and before I taught her how to throw knives. </p><p>
  <em> I spun around, careful not to throw the knife and accidentally end the alliance.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Just me,” Astrid laughed. I lowered the knife and let her walk over.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “Hey. It’s getting a little crazy in there so I thought I’d come and stab some shit, you?” I gave a half-laugh and threw the knife at the nearest tree, watching it stick.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> She nodded, shrugging, “I think you have the right idea.” </em>
</p><p>
  <em> “It was so much easier when all we had to worry about were Grounders and not dying, now there’s Mountain Men, alliances, man-made acid fog… Still, I prefer this to being on the Ark.” I groaned.</em>
</p><p>
  <em> “You hated life on the Ark that much?” Astrid seemed surprised.  </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I shrugged, “Another month and I’d be dead, I was in the SkyBox. Earth may be doing its best to wipe us out, but I think we’re doing alright. Or at least we will be, once the forty-seven are safe.”  </em>
</p><p>I shook the memory out of my head, trying to ignore it. This was not how I liked things to go. Fight for my life, right? <em> Ge smak daun, gyon op nodotaim! </em> That was how I do things. This is how I survive. I am a survivor. </p><p>Then it hit me.</p><p>I’m not a survivor. I’m a <em> fighter. </em> I always thought I was a survivor, but that’s not entirely true. A survivor does everything for survival, even betrayal. A fighter does whatever it takes to keep their values while fighting for their survival. I don’t want to be a survivor. I want to be a <em> fighter. </em></p><p>“Jackson?” I called. He was about to leave but he came over quickly. </p><p>“You okay?” Concern framed his face. </p><p>“How long until I can try to walk? I don’t care if it’s in crutches or I have to spend a week in a damn chair, I’m <em> not </em> giving up.” </p><p>His smile at my resilience was tinged with worry. “The moment you can walk they’ll execute you.” </p><p>“The moment I can walk, I can <em> fight,</em>” I reassured him, even though that wasn’t entirely true. “And I am willing to fight for my life.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Walk, Don't Run</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"We may not have many people on the outside who they don’t know about, but if I get a bullet to the brain while flipping off Pike’s fascist ass then so be it. Some things are worth fighting for."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Jackson had given me exercises to do while lying down, and once a day he’d come in to check on the Grounder patients before walking me through them. Of course, there was no actual walking involved, not yet anyway. It was mostly just bending my knee in various stretches. But, with help, I was able to stand. </p><p>Not for very long, of course, but stand nonetheless. The last I’d heard was that Raven was fashioning a brace not unlike her own to help my movement between using crutches and being fully recovered. It would be heavy, but I’d been told it would make an impact. When I saw Raven she was allowed up to the door, but no further, to speak to me. She seemed happier, and she was no longer limping. I still remembered her conversation with Abby, “Your leg is never gonna heal.” It surprised me how well she was faring, but then again, Raven had never been one to stay down for long. </p><p>I asked her what changed, but she said something about the “City of Light” and I couldn’t for the life of me figure out what she was talking about. Jackson mentioned the place as well during one of the sessions, but he didn’t go into any detail and I all but completely wrote it out of my mind. A place without pain, anger, and regret? Shit, those are some of the basic cornerstones of my personality, so I think I’ll pass. </p><p>The point is, I was improving— according to Jackson at least— and there was light at the end of the tunnel. This ‘light’ however, had no effect on the fact that I was still in the dark about all of the other decisions and events happening at Arkadia. </p><p>Thanks to some crutches, after a while, I was able to walk from one end of the cell to the other. God knows why, but with my earphones in it was soon one of my favourite things to do. Only with Lincoln watching the door of course, in case Pike decided to pay us a visit. There were currently three songs that I liked to play on repeat while walking: <em> I Lived </em> by One Republic, <em> Microphone </em> by American Authors and <em> Out of The Woods </em> by Taylor Swift. More often than not Lincoln would laugh as he caught me humming along to one of the songs while sitting in the corner. </p><p>Being interned wasn’t that bad, I mean the food was <em> crap</em>, and I’m pretty sure the only reason we were still getting fed was that it would be inhumane <em> not </em> to. But the food was a torture in itself, and I think that was part of the point. </p><p>Yes, I had my workout playlist, but I also had two favourite songs that <em> weren’t </em> on that playlist. Having the time of being in lockup, I had officially learnt all the words to <em> Centuries </em> by Fall Out Boy and <em> Cinema </em> by Benny Benassi. I had to admit, whoever had this MP3 before I did had a <em> brilliant </em> taste in music, and if there hadn’t been a whole nuclear war and our paths had crossed, we might have gotten along pretty well. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>You are my cinema </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I could watch you forever </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Action, thriller, I could watch you forever </em>
</p><p>
  <em> You are my cinema </em>
</p><p>
  <em> My Hollywood treasure </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Love you, just the way you are </em>
</p><p>
  <em> My cinema, my cinema </em>
</p><p> </p><p>I sang along quietly to try and cheer up some of my sick Grounder cellmates. Denae was getting slightly better and even though she didn’t entirely speak English, she had taken to smiling at me every time I started singing. </p><p>The bad dreams had gotten better— only slightly— and there were less of them since it was easier to stay awake with music in my ears than it was with only silence surrounding me. I had pushed all the thoughts to the back of my mind, and prayed that for now, they’d stay there. The lack of sleep made me look like I’d just crawled out of an apocalypse, but it in no way impacted on my ironically upbeat attitude. I mean, if they want to drain the life out of me by locking me up, go ahead! I’m going to prove the point that it has no effect on me, if anything, it’s made me in a better mood! (Not really, most of it was an act, but I was fully determined to prove this point). </p><p>At one point Miller had a shift on the door and I called to him from where I was sitting. “Miller! Buddy, enlighten me! What’s happening in the real world?” </p><p>“The real world <em> sucks</em>,” he laughed. “A Grounder army has formed a blockade around the camp. Anyone who crosses it dies, unless they surrender Pike.”</p><p>“Ouch, but fair. He’s not going to surrender, is he?” </p><p>“Not likely, no.” Miller shrugged, but then his face fell serious. “Monroe’s dead, Alyssa.” </p><p>I was caught off guard, “What? How?” </p><p>“A group tried to raid a Grounder village but they were warned and it was a trap, poisoned fire smoke,” he explained solemnly. </p><p>“<em>Shit,</em>” I breathed. Monroe had been a fighter, and one of the one hundred kids sent down here originally. I wondered how many of us were left by now. “That’s… <em> shit.</em>” My brain could barely compute how it could have happened. </p><p>Bellamy appeared and he locked eyes with me for a second before turning to Miller and the other guards. “No access here for anyone until further notice. The prisoners are on lockdown.” </p><p>I scoffed, shouting to him, “Nice to see you too!” as he disappeared back down the hall. “<em>Ass,</em>” I muttered to myself quietly. </p><p>~</p><p>The door opened and I looked up, taking out my earphones and hiding them under the blanket. Sinclair was thrown into lockup and his hands uncuffed. He flexed his wrists and glared at the door he’d entered from. Lincoln stood up, surprised, “What’d you do to get in here?” </p><p>“Whatever it took,” he shrugged, before leaning in closer. “I have a message to you from Kane. Get ready, tonight’s a go.” </p><p>My eyes widened, “Lincoln, can you come here a second?” </p><p>He obliged and came over, sitting down next to me. “Are you okay?”</p><p>“I’m more than <em>okay</em> at lip-reading. What <em> have </em> you been planning?” </p><p>“Tonight there’s going to be a riot. Kane’s using it as a cover to take Pike to force the army to lift the blockade.” </p><p>I laughed, “Well I’ll be damned. This is an interesting turn of events.” My smile turned into a frown, “I can’t help, can I? I’ll only slow you down…” </p><p>“Time is all we need, but we don’t want you to get hurt again,” he whispered, leaving to check on Denae.</p><p>Roughly four hours later, Sinclair called for Bellamy. He showed, hovering on the other side of the door and flicking his eyes between Sinclair and where I was half-leaning against the wall, propped up by the crutches to work on my strength. The MP3 was secured in my pocket, and I smiled hopefully at Lincoln. It was now or never. </p><p>“You have something to say?” Bellamy asked Sinclair, his voice low. </p><p>“What do you want to know?” He replied.</p><p>“Everything.”</p><p>Lincoln slowly stood up, keeping an eye on the door. </p><p>“I want immunity,” Sinclair continued. “I’m the chief engineer and this camp needs me.” </p><p>Bellamy nodded, “That’s up to Pike, but it shouldn’t be a problem. What have you got?”</p><p>Lincoln moved towards Sinclair slowly, his voice laced with disgust. “So… the cowards make their deals to save their own skin.” </p><p>“Quiet,” Bellamy warned. </p><p>I tried to hide my smile, <em> this was about to get interesting. </em> Lincoln had revealed some parts of their plan, and it was a plan I liked… but I hadn’t been completely looped in and now I got to watch it unfold with somehow even more respect for the two men than I had previously. </p><p>“Can’t defeat the army at the gate, so you turn on your own? Make you feel strong?” </p><p>“I said be quiet,” Bellamy threatened Lincoln with a slightly harsher tone this time. </p><p>Lincoln glared at him, “I’m not the one who needs to be silenced.” He reached forwards toward Sinclair, whispering “You’ll tell them nothing,” as he ripped him away from the gate and began punching him. </p><p>“Come with me,” Bellamy grabbed two of the other guards and brought them into the cell as Lincoln finished pretending to punch Sinclair, none of the punches landed on his face as they had made it appear, instead hitting lightly on his forearms. </p><p>Lincoln shouted and the cell went <em> berserk. </em> All of the Grounders charged at the door and the guards, disabling them as Lincoln took out Bellamy. They pushed on the door until their combined power overwhelmed the guards and it was forced open. Someone hit the alarm and I threw a punch at their face as I limped past, out of the door and watched the others take down the guards. Harper rushed through and shock-lashed one of the Grounders with her baton before announcing into her radio, “It worked, we’re clear. The guards have their hands full.” </p><p>One of the guards came towards me and I swung my crutch at his crotch, leaning against the wall to regain my balance. Two other guards ran at Lincoln and while they did I grabbed one of their shock batons and lashed another oncoming guard. Bellamy checked his radio and ran out the front and I realised someone had somehow let it slip. I hurtled the baton with all of my strength at him as he rounded the corner, but it barely clipped his back as he turned. I cursed, we were so screwed if this failed. </p><p>And it did. </p><p>The riot we had caused was soon overpowered and I was forcibly thrown back into the cell where I staggered back almost a dozen steps in a feeble attempt to remain upright. I got in a few sharp jabs from my crutch before the door shut but that was it. </p><p>It was over. </p><p>I wasn’t willing to give up… the others still had hope that Kane had come through, but I had a feeling that thinking that would be futile. My thoughts were proven as Kane was taken into lockup with us, the shocked faces of Lincoln and Sinclair showing me that even they had not imagined a way in which it wasn’t going to work. They had put too much on the line for it. </p><p>I looked up from where I was sitting, slouched in the corner with one earbud up my sleeve yet again, my crutch lying next to me and the blanket around my shoulders. It was clearly written on Kane’s face what was going to happen. “They’re going to kill you, aren’t they?” </p><p>“The punishment for treason… is death, yes.” </p><p>“Treason, attempted kidnapping, attempted murder? That’s the holy trinity of death wishes right there, my friend,” despite the circumstances, I laughed. “You think they’ll settle for my duo as well? Treason and attempted murder?”</p><p>He sighed, “It is likely, yes. I’m sorry.” </p><p>“Don’t be. I stand by my decision. Besides, I don’t give up that easily. We may not have many people on the outside who they don’t know about, but if I get a bullet to the brain while flipping off Pike’s fascist ass then <em> so be it. </em> Some things are worth fighting for.”</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Stand Down</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Gotta love that mid-murder sunrise, really sets the mood."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Lincoln paced and Kane sat on a bench, visibly pondering his eventual demise. It was hard not to think about it, I’d give him that. Sinclair lay on his back on the floor, staring at the ceiling just as I had done when I was first put in holding, identifying every individual crack and hole simply for a way to pass the time. </p><p>I had been leaning on my arm lazily with my earphones in but as soon as I heard a guard announce “Chancellor on deck,” I shot upright, hiding them under the blanket. </p><p>Kane stood up abruptly, “I thought I had more time.” </p><p>“I’m not here for you,” Pike assured him. “Each of you is guilty of the same crimes as Kane, and as such, you will share the same fate— death.” </p><p>Bellamy stood behind him and I raised an eyebrow, taunting him. He kept the same blank stare that I knew was a front to all of his emotions. The Bellamy Blake I knew wouldn’t be okay with this. Not that I should care, anyway. </p><p>One of the Grounder women stood up, worried. Lincoln put a hand out to reassure her before turning to Pike. “My people are innocent. They know nothing. Don’t let them suffer for my crimes.”</p><p>“Please, Sir. Lincoln’s right,” I heard Bellamy whisper. “All the others did was run through an open door. Same thing we would do if we were in there.” </p><p>Pike studied Lincoln before his eyes strayed around the room to the other Grounders, finally falling on me. “I believe that’s true. Kane, Lincoln, Sinclair, as the leaders of this coup, you will pay for your crimes with your lives. Alyssa Jones, for your role in the initial opposition and for your crimes of treason and attempted murder, you will also pay with your life.” </p><p>I scoffed, “Tell me something I don’t already know.”</p><p>“Execution is set for dawn,” he replied. </p><p>“Oh, fun.” I gasped sarcastically, “Gotta love that mid-murder sunrise. Really sets the mood.” </p><p>Bellamy shot me a look that encompassed “please, stop” but I ignored him. Lincoln gave me a glance and I laughed in return. </p><p>“What? I’ve got time to kill and fascist leaders to insult. Speaking of which, Pike— who are you going to get to clear up our blood? Our friends or our families? Gotta love the new Arkadia dictator, really knows how to spoil a crowd.” I caught Bellamy’s eye again and his expression pleaded with me to stop, but I simply carried on. “Better get there bright and early for some front row seats!” I laughed with false enthusiasm. “The camp’s going to witness it’s first Skaikru on Skaikru public murder! Read my lips, Pike. <em> Go float yourself. </em> Unless you fancy doing it at dawn, right? What’s one more body on the pile of people you’ve sent to die.” </p><p>He turned and left, and Bellamy was the last in his group to go. Giving me one final look before he followed Pike. </p><p>Kane looked to me the moment they had gone. “What the hell are you playing at?” </p><p>“What are they gonna do, kill me? Newsflash, they already set the date,” I deadpanned. </p><p>Despite the situation, Sinclair laughed. “I can’t believe it, but she’s got a point.” </p><p>~</p><p>Kane traced the insignia of the clans on the inside of his arm mindlessly. </p><p>“Could’ve worked,” Lincoln said quietly. </p><p>He looked up at him, “Death can be an act of unity too. We don’t break. We don’t show fear. The people will remember.”</p><p>“Chancellor on deck,” someone called and I sat upright. It’s time. Clenching my hands into fists, I pocketed my MP3 and the earphones. Pike opened the door and the guards stormed in, getting everyone to back up so that they could take out the four “traitors”. </p><p>One of the guards walked over to me to haul me onto my good leg but I stopped him, “I’d rather you didn’t.” Instead, I pulled myself up using the wall and held onto the crutch for support. </p><p>“Against the wall, now.” Pike ordered and we turned to face the wall. Everyone’s hands were cuffed and mine at a pretty awkward angle to allow me the use of my crutch. Any further and I was sure that my other arm would pop out of its socket. We were marched out of the cell, flanked by guards and with Pike at the very front. Harper walked past, and Pike ordered her, “Make way.” </p><p>“Yes Sir, Mr Chancellor,” she replied, nodding at him. Harper sent a glance my way, not quite a smile, but her face wasn’t unhappy and she looked as if she were on a mission. She probably was. </p><p>Pike’s radio crackled into action with a message from Monty’s mom, “Sir, you were right. Octavia is here and she’s not working alone.” </p><p>“On their knees,” Pike turned to us and we were forced to the ground. The motion sent a wave of pain through my leg and I winced, but tried not to show it. </p><p>“Float you,” I muttered to the guard, readjusting the position of my crutch so that I’d be able to get back up again. </p><p>Pike turned around to speak into the radio, “Can you confirm a location?” </p><p>“Negative, sir.” </p><p>Bryan spoke up, “We can assume her friends have already told her where we’re taking them. We shouldn’t go any further until you know the route’s secure.” </p><p>“Put them in there, let’s go. <em> Move! </em>” The Chancellor ordered, throwing us into the nearest bunk room. “I want two men on the door.” </p><p>The door shut behind us and I looked around, a moment later, a floorboard popped open and Octavia’s head appeared. “Everybody in.”</p><p>I smiled, “Nice to see you to,” and I meant it, as she helped me into the hole. Lincoln climbed in afterwards, followed by Sinclair and Kane and then they pulled the metal back over the hole and stayed silent. </p><p>We waited quietly and I could hear Pike’s heavy breathing above us. “Damn!” he cursed, kicking something over. I winced as it hit the ground, but didn’t make a sound. “We did what they wanted us to do,” he sighed. “That won’t happen again.” </p><p>When they left, they also happened to leave the door open and Octavia popped her head out first before announcing the all-clear. She pulled me up and Lincoln gave me a hand, and once we were out she passed me something. “This is from Miller, by the way.” <em> My jacket</em>, knives and all. </p><p>“Miller, you legend,” I whispered to myself quietly, pulling out the lockpick from the right sleeve and instantly getting to work on the restraints. Once they popped open, I pulled the jacket on and grinned to myself, its weight reassuring me that I was, once again, <em> very </em> well armed. </p><p>Abby burst in, followed by Miller and Bryan. Miller saw me wearing the jacket and flashed me a grin. “I see you got my gift?” He asked. </p><p>“Legend,” I pointed finger guns at him, “Utter legend.” </p><p>The radio crackled to life with Harper’s voice and Octavia froze. “OKS, come in.” </p><p>“What is it?” Lincoln asked her worriedly.</p><p>Octavia scrambled for the radio, “This wasn’t the plan. We use their frequency so they could hear us.” She raised it to her ear, “Go ahead?”</p><p>“Stay where you are,” Harper warned. “Repeat, stay where you are. The exit is not clear.” </p><p>“How many guards,” Octavia asked her. </p><p>Harper hissed back, “Too many. I said, stay put.” </p><p>We looked at each other, aware of the delay to the plan and trying to figure out what to do next. The radio ticked again and this time it was Monty’s voice, not Harper’s on the frequency. “Calling all guards. The prisoners are headed for the main gate, the prisoners are headed for the main gate, over.”</p><p>“That was Monty,” Octavia breathed. </p><p>Miller raised an eyebrow, “I guess he’s with us after all.” </p><p>“Pike will find out,” Kane shook his head. </p><p>I froze, “They’ll kill him.”</p><p>“We don’t know that,” Abby tried to reassure us. “But what we do know is we have to move.” </p><p>Rushing through the corridors we made our way to the secret exit quickly and unnoticed. Octavia showed us the way and helped me into the crawlspace first, just as Hannah’s announcement rang out.</p><p>“Attention all citizens, emergency lockdown is in effect. Return to your quarters immediately.” </p><p>I hovered in the crawlspace, about to tell everyone to get a move on when I lowered my gaze so as not to stare and Kane and Abby as they began a passionate goodbye kiss. I mean, it’s not hard to see it coming, but it was an awkward situation to be in all the same. When Pike’s voice rang out from the radio, my breath hitched in my throat. “I have a message for the traitors in this camp. There will be an execution today. Either turn yourselves in, or the other Grounder prisoners will die in your place.” </p><p>“Let’s go,” Octavia tugged on Lincoln’s arm but he moved away towards the door. “No. Wait.” </p><p>He shook his head, “I can’t let them die because of me.” </p><p>“Lincoln, please, we’re almost out,” she pleaded. </p><p>Kane stepped in, “I know what you’re feeling, but they’re searching the station. We need to go now.” </p><p>“You should,” Lincoln agreed, but not in the way any of us wanted him to. </p><p>Octavia stood her ground, “Fine. I’m going with you. <em>Oso throu daun ogeda.”</em> <em>We fight together.</em> </p><p>“I love you,” his hand traced her cheekbone, drawing her into a steady kiss but I watched as his other hand reached around her back to the sedative strapped to her pack. Lincoln pulled it out and jammed it into the side of her neck. </p><p>“<em>No…</em>” She tried to object but her body went limp and he caught her before she could fall. </p><p>Kane was shocked, “What are you doing?” </p><p>“Same thing you’d do for your people. Just get her out of here,” he handed her to Kane. </p><p>I shifted my position, reaching an arm out for him to clasp his own around it. <em> “Yu laik ai kru,” </em> I whispered, knowing I’d be seeing him for the last time. <em> You are my people. </em> I returned into the crawl space as Kane said goodbye so that once he was finished he could climb in with Octavia. </p><p>I turned onto my back so that it was easier to crawl along the tunnel, shifting my weight so that I didn’t have to push myself along on my bad leg. Once we were along, it was a short drop down and Miller and Bryan made it slightly easier for me so that I didn’t land on my one good leg and injure that too. Octavia’s horse was waiting, tethered to a tree, and Kane put her atop it, leading it so that she would not fall. I limped at the front, inwardly wishing that I had had access to that brace in time because the crutch kept sinking into the wet mud. With a sigh, I decided to get rid of it and replace it with a large stick as soon as possible. </p><p>Bryan and Miller walked either side of me, and the procession was silent. Octavia began to wake up and she fell from the horse, crawling her way to see Arkadia as Pike led Lincoln out into the rain, hands bound. She stumbled through a bush and came out the other side, leaning on a tree with tears falling from her eyes. “No… <em> no…</em>” she whispered, covering her mouth with one hand. </p><p>I moved towards her, standing just behind for the support in case she needed it, which I feared she soon might. Lincoln dropped to his knees of his own accord as Pike backed away slightly, throwing up mud in all directions as he landed in the dirt. Rain slowly tracked patterns on his clothes, but he continued to stare straight ahead. I reached for Octavia’s arm as her tears mixed with the rain, both of which getting heavier. The contact was for support but also to stop her from moving, because she had the ability to do something undoubtedly reckless in the same fashion that I might, but I knew she needed me here. </p><p>There are few occasions where I regret being able to read lips, and this was one of them. I couldn’t see Pike’s face, but I could see Lincoln’s, and somehow that was worse. I didn’t need to read what Pike was saying, I already knew. </p><p>“Lincoln of Trikru, you have been sentenced to death in accordance with the Exodus Charter. Any last words?” </p><p>Lincoln looked at him, his face betraying no emotion as his eyes tracked Pike on his short journey from where he had been standing in front to where he now stopped at Lincoln’s side. Lincoln’s eyes then moved upwards, looking off into the distance but towards where we were, most likely for Octavia. </p><p>“Not for you.” </p><p>Pike removed the gun from his gear, raising it next to Lincoln’s head. </p><p>Lincoln whispered again, <em> “Mebi oso na hit choda op nodotaim.” </em> Trigedasleng for <em> may we meet again. </em> </p><p>I watched the scene unfold, Pike wasn’t rushing but he was taking his time with it which is what made the scene so much more unbearable. I began to whisper the traveller’s blessing. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em>In peace, may you leave the shore. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> In love, may you find the next. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Safe passage on your travels until our final journey on the ground. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> May we meet again. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>I’m not entirely sure why I did it, only it felt right. The gunshot rang out, echoing across the surrounding area and Octavia choked, watching her boyfriend fall to the muddy ground. I tightened my grip on her arm out of both comfort and shock, biting back tears of my own as Lincoln’s blood seeped into the surrounding dirt. </p><p>
  <em> Yu gonplei ste odon. </em>
</p><p>
  <br/>
  <br/>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The title is from the song "Cloud" by Elias, which is the song playing in the background at the end of the episode (I'm sorry, I had to).</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Campfire Stories</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"So how did you get attacked by a panther?"</p><p>"The first or second time?" </p><p>"Wait, which time do I know about?"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Octavia, I—” I struggled with what to say, but she cut me off before I could get any words out. </p><p>“I’m fine,” she replied sternly. </p><p>I took a deep breath, reaching for her as the rest of us walked in silence, she shrugged me off and continued ahead, taking the reins of her horse from Kane who had been minding him and climbing onto her horse’s back. </p><p>Once we arrived at the cave, Miller and Harper went in first in silence, followed by Bryan, Sinclair, Kane and I hovered at the back for Octavia whilst she tied up her horse outside. Bellamy stood up when we went in, and I noticed that he had been chained to the cave wall. He counted the people in his head as we arrived, pausing. I could tell what he was thinking, but he asked anyway, probably only to confirm it. </p><p>“Where’s Lincoln?”</p><p>Octavia didn’t meet his eyes, sheathing her sword and attaching it to her belt. “Pike put a bullet in his brain.” Her eyes filled with tears but she didn’t look up, not straight away. When she did, the grief was filled with anger and she turned on her brother, spinning around as he tried to comfort her only for him to receive a punch to the side of the face. </p><p>“O, O, I am so sorry,” he tried, but she punched him again and again. </p><p>And being Bellamy, he stood there and took every one of them. </p><p>“Octavia, that’s enough,” Kane warned. </p><p>Bellamy looked up, his face bloody. “Kane, stay out of this.” </p><p>Octavia panted as she lunged at him again, punching him in the stomach and then when he crumpled, lifting him up only to punch him again. Miller tried to intervene, but Bellamy told him to back up as Octavia was prepared to attack him too for her brother’s mistakes. Miller did as told, retreating, and allowing Octavia to continue. She hit him twice more, ignoring the blood filling his mouth, matting in his hair and splattering his face with every new blow. </p><p>“You’re dead to me,” she sobbed, storming out of the cave and into the forest. </p><p>Bellamy lay there on the floor, breathing heavily with his face covered in blood. He didn’t seem to be in visible pain from the punches, not that he’d show it if he was, but Octavia’s words seemed to hurt him more than anything. </p><p>Even though there was a risk of her potentially throwing a few punches in my direction, I followed from a safe distance, waiting until she had cooled down slightly before announcing my presence. “Octavia,” I said her name quietly. </p><p>She turned around, the anger from before gone and leaving her only with grief. “Lyss…” </p><p>I took a few hesitant steps towards her, but once I realised she wasn’t opposed to it I took two more, more surely. I pulled her into a hug and although she was stiff at first, after a moment or two she began to relax into me, letting out quiet sobs. “I know you want to be strong, but you don’t have to be. Not all the time.” </p><p>“I have to be strong,” she whispered, “For Lincoln.” </p><p>“You are strong, despite everything that happens, you stay strong. But that doesn’t mean you aren’t allowed to grieve, O. You love him.” I was careful not to use the past tense, because even though Lincoln <em> was </em> past tense now, she still loves him and a part of her always will. </p><p>Octavia squeezed me tighter and I drew her in closer, letting her bury her face in my shoulder and clutching her tight with everything I had. “I love him… and now he’s gone.” </p><p>“I know,” I held her close. “I know.” </p><p>~</p><p>We were in the middle of thinking up a plan of action when the radio surprised everyone by crackling into life. “Bellamy, come in. It’s Monty. I’m in trouble. Please say you still have your radio.” </p><p>I froze, reaching for the radio but Sinclair put his hand in the way, getting to it first. </p><p>“If we respond and Pike’s listening—” he warned.</p><p>Bellamy spoke up, leaning against the wall further away and still in chains. “Go to channel seven. ‘Please say you still have your radio’. That’s seven words after the word ‘trouble’. It’s code, go to seven.” </p><p>Sinclair looked at Kane for approval and waited for his nod, changing the channel before passing it to him. </p><p>“Bellamy, are you there?” Monty whispered. </p><p>Kane answered, “Monty, it’s Kane. What’s wrong?” </p><p>“Pike knows that I helped you get out.” </p><p>Everyone shared a simultaneous look of '<em>oh fuck' </em> before Kane could reply again. “Can you get to the dropship?” </p><p>“I think so,” Monty answered nervously. </p><p>“Good. Go there, I’ll bring you in,” Kane assured him. “Stay off the radio. Over and out.” </p><p>Harper hesitated, “Hold on. What if it’s a trap and Pike’s waiting?” </p><p>“That’s why I’m going alone,” Kane replied decisively. </p><p>“Like hell you are,” Octavia and I announced at the same time before shooting each other a quick glance. </p><p>“I’m with them, Monty saved our lives. I’m going too. Lyss… bad idea.” said Miller.</p><p>“I’m a good shot!” I protested. “I have amazing aim, I don’t even need to get close!” </p><p>He sighed, “You’re even better when you’re up in the trees out of sight, but something tells me you can’t do that on that leg yet.” </p><p>I groaned, “Fine.” </p><p>Kane shook his head, “Neither of you are going. If it is a trap then I’m not marching our entire insurgency into it.” </p><p>Octavia glared at him, “To stop me, you’re gonna have to kill me.” </p><p>“She hopes it’s a trap,” Bellamy announced from the other end of the room.</p><p>She rolled her eyes, “He’s coming too. We’ll need a hostage to trade for Monty.” </p><p>“It’s a good plan,” Kane agreed. “He stays chained. Gag him.” </p><p>Miller gestured to Bellamy, “Sir, with all due respect—” </p><p>“He’s the enemy. Do what I said.” </p><p>~</p><p>Once Kane and Octavia left with Bellamy. It was just Sinclair, Miller, Bryan and Harper. Miller turned to me, eyeing my crutch. “So your bullet wound, isn’t that like… what? Three? Four inches below your stab wound?” </p><p>I laughed, “No, my stab wound is the <em> other </em> leg.”</p><p>“Oh, sorry for forgetting about your other major injuries,” he replied sarcastically. </p><p>Bryan’s eyes widened, “You got stabbed?”</p><p>“I’ve been shot, attacked by a panther, stabbed… haven’t been poisoned yet, so that’s good. I’ve had multiple concussions though, and one time I shot through a glass sunroof to get out of a locked car, but I didn’t get that injured,” I shrugged. </p><p>“Okay, now <em> this </em> is one I don’t already know about. When did you shoot out a sunroof?” Miller leant in, interested. </p><p>“Before Mount Weather. Bellamy, Octavia, and I were trying to find a way into the mountain when acid fog hit, so we had to take cover in this old car garage. We split up, and I saw the MP3 on the back of a car seat and decided I wanted it, and the door was unlocked so I just opened it and crawled in to get it. Then the door shut and locked behind me, and the Reapers showed up, so I shot out the sunroof and burst out all guns blazing,” I laughed. “Bellamy just gave me that look that was like ‘<em>really? Again? </em>’ because he was getting so used to me pulling crazy shit! He just picked a piece of glass out of my hair and sighed, it was hilarious.” </p><p>Bryan laughed, “That sounds amazing. Painful, but amazing.” </p><p>“One time I saw her jump out of a tree and stab someone, it was pretty damn hardcore,” Harper laughed, impressed. </p><p>“The battle of the dropship camp, I was shooting from a tree and ran out of bullets so I jumped out, landing on this dude and slit his throat before throwing the knife at another oncoming Grounder,” I shrugged, “What can I say? I have a <em> slight </em> flair for the dramatics.”</p><p>“Slight?” Miller scoffed, “When you got stabbed you turned around and said ‘okay, <em> rude</em>’, before <em> taking the knife out </em> and using it on the Grounder who stabbed you with it in the first place!” </p><p>“Okay, so more than <em>slight </em> then,” I laughed. </p><p>Sinclair decided to join in, slightly amused, “So how did you get attacked by a panther?” </p><p>“The first or second time?” I joked.</p><p>Miller shot me a sideways glance, “Wait, which time do <em> I </em> know about?” </p><p>“Not sure. The first time was when a group of us went to rescue Jasper from when he got speared, and while Finn and Murphy were getting him down from the tree the weird panther thing appeared, and Wells had grabbed Bellamy’s gun so he tried taking it down, but he was a bit of a crap shot since he’d never had any practice so I grabbed it and shot the thing before it had a chance to tear Bellamy’s head off,” I explained. </p><p>“And the <em> second </em> time?” Bryan asked cautiously. </p><p>“Miller, Harper, you remember when the food supply hut burnt down, and we all had to go hunting again? That time me and Jones brought back a panther, the thing almost took a chunk out of me before he speared it. I’ve got one hell of a scar,” I laughed, shrugging off my jacket and letting it hit the floor with a hard thud. Twisting around, I pulled the side of my tank top down to reveal the scarred claw marks on my shoulder. </p><p>Sinclair blinked twice, taken by surprise. “What was it like before we came down? We lost contact on Unity Day.”</p><p>“Apart from almost getting killed by Grounders every now and then, it was alright,” Miller explained. “Although a twelve-year-old stabbed Wells and we did almost hang Murphy once for a crime it turned out he didn’t commit, and there was the whole biological warfare incident… and then the hostage situation… other than that it was okay.” </p><p>Both Sinclair and Bryan’s eyebrows shot up, “Do we <em> want </em> to know about any of those?” Sinclair asked cautiously. </p><p>I shared a glance with Miller and Harper before changing the subject, “Probably not. Hey, Miller… you’re probably the best shot I know, you were pretty good in the Grounder war at camp.” </p><p>“The best shot other than yourself…?” he teased, causing me to laugh. </p><p>“Was that not implied?” </p><p>Bryan looked at me, thinking, “If you’re such a good shot, why didn’t you join The Guard?” </p><p>I shrugged, “I sort of ran on my own timetable, I’d take like six shifts in a row and then crash and apparently that was ‘unreliable’ and ‘a danger to my health’, so I was never officially recruited.”</p><p>“How good a shot are you?” He asked, “Without showing us with the gun— we don’t want to give off a big show shouting ‘I’m here!’ to all the Grounders nearby.” </p><p>I laughed, thinking it over but Harper replied before I could. “Alyssa’s pretty damn good, when she was a gunner at camp she’d strap herself into the trees as a lookout with a gun and she was the only one Bellamy would actually trust to do that because she can definitely take care of herself.” </p><p>Smiling, I shrugged, “Yeah, you’ve got a point. Guns and knives, can’t beat ‘em. Used to shoot and throw knives at approaching enemies while hidden in the trees.” </p><p>“One time I looked up and she was just <em> there</em>, on watch, at like three in the morning. Alyssa has the most unhealthy sleep schedule I’ve ever seen,” Miller laughed. </p><p>“I can’t even <em> try </em> and deny that,” I grinned. </p><p>~</p><p>It was quite a while later, but Octavia and Bellamy returned with Monty, and Bellamy was no longer bound and gagged, so I was unable to tell if it was a good or bad thing. “Where’s Kane?” Sinclair asked. </p><p>“He’s going to Polis with Pike to see the new Commander.” </p><p>“It was a trap?” Harper raised an eyebrow, “How did it go down?”</p><p>“He cuffed us all so Bellamy volunteered to show him where the cave was, but instead took him just outside the blockade and called a Grounder army on him,” Monty explained. </p><p>I stood up and hugged him, “Thanks for helping us get out, you could’ve died for it.” </p><p>“It was the right thing to do,” he shrugged but hugged me back anyway. </p><p>“What now?” Miller looked at the rest of us, “Do we just go back? We can’t go back to Arkadia without Pike <em> or </em> Kane, all hell will break loose.” </p><p>I shrugged, “We’ll figure it out. We always seem to.” </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>I felt like we needed just a bit of relaxing with some of the remainder of the delinquents because everyones always about to die and like they've just faced an immediate threat, and now they can just piss about, talk about old times, and be exhausted.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. A.L.I.E</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"You left your jacket in there... I thought you might be cold."</p><p>"I'm fine." </p><p>"So you're shivering by choice?" </p><p>"Shut up."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>All thoughts of going back to Arkadia disappeared after Jasper radioed. Something about Clarke, A.L.I.E, AI, mind control and the City of Light? I vaguely remembered Raven and Jackson mentioning the City of Light once or twice, but other than that I had zero clue what was going on. I mean, spending a load of time out of the loop and in a cell really has that effect on a person. </p><p>Bellamy looked up and spotted his sister packing her things. “O, wait. You can’t just leave.” </p><p>“Watch me,” she rolled her eyes and made no effort to stop. </p><p>“You heard what Jasper said on the radio, Arkadia is not safe,” he warned her. </p><p>She scoffed, “What Jasper said sounds insane. Pike’s gone, I can handle myself. Grounders burn their dead.”</p><p>“I know that, and then what? Where are you gonna go?” </p><p>“You don’t get to ask me that,” Octavia snapped. </p><p>Bellamy lowered his voice, “What more do I have to do to prove to you that I am on your side?” </p><p>“Bring Lincoln back,” she snapped, pushing past him out of the door. “Turning Pike in does <em> not </em> make you one of the good guys, Bellamy. You did that to save me, not because what you thought Pike was doing to the Grounders was wrong.”</p><p>He turned around, “The Grounders were starving us out.” </p><p>“Because you massacred an army that was sent to protect us!” She spat. </p><p>Bellamy sighed, “That army could’ve attacked us at any time and you know it.” </p><p>“But they didn’t attack. <em> You </em> did that. You were hurting, and you lashed out because that’s what you do. There are consequences, Bell. People get hurt. People die, your people. Monroe’s dead. <em> Lincoln </em> is dead,” she stormed out. </p><p>Bellamy tried to go after her but the rover pulled up, Clarke and Jasper getting out. </p><p>“Need your help! We have to get her inside before she wakes up!” Jasper shouted, running along and carrying an unconscious Raven.</p><p>“Were you followed?” Bellamy asked, running to his aid. </p><p>“Maybe— I don’t know,” he shrugged, carrying her inside with Bellamy’s help. </p><p>Millar looked around, “Get to the ridge,” he told Bryan. “Radio if you spot anyone following. Harper, we’ll stay here on watch.” </p><p>Octavia paused, unsure if she should still leave or not, but the decision was made for her when Clarke called out, “Octavia, come on. We need you.” Octavia sighed and came back inside. “Clear some space,” Clarke ordered. </p><p>Bellamy lay Raven down on the ground and Sinclair knelt down beside her instantly, “What the hell happened to her?” He asked, his eyes filled with worry. </p><p>“I told you on the radio, Raven is not Raven anymore. None of them are,” Jasper explained. “Jaha’s been chipping everyone.” </p><p>“Jasper’s right,” Clarke confirmed. “I’ve seen it with my own eyes.” </p><p>He glared at her, “I don’t need your help, alright?” </p><p>“Just take it easy and explain,” Bellamy tried to calm him, ever the <em> fucking </em> peacemaker.</p><p>Jasper sighed, “Jaha’s using the chips to control everyone. You swallow it and it changes you. You forget who you are and then you see this thing A.L.I.E, only she’s not really there. She made Raven slit her own wrists. She was trying to get her out of her head, I was trying to help her but…” he trailed off. </p><p>“Okay, so let’s help her now,” Sinclair said decisively. “Did she say how?” </p><p>“She was working on building something, she needed one of our old wristbands but Jaha destroyed all of them.”</p><p>“Wait a second,” Clarke cut in, pulling a small case out of her pocket and taking an even smaller item out of it, holding it up to the light. “Does it look like this?” </p><p>I turned to Raven, only to see her eyes flutter open and fixate on the small device in Clarke’s hand. </p><p>“Not exactly,” Jasper answered. </p><p>Raven shot to her feet and I tackled her, but she hit me in my injured leg and I grunted, falling to the ground. <em> Dammit. </em> Clarke ran after her and Miller and Harper grabbed her once she was outside. Bellamy offered a hand to help me to my feet but I rolled over myself and stood up without assistance, wincing in pain. </p><p>“LET ME GO!” Raven screamed, punching and kicking anyone that got too close, which was unfortunate considering everyone was simultaneously trying to restrain her. </p><p>Jasper grabbed her, “If Raven finds out where we are, so will A.L.I.E. She’ll come for her,” he jammed her with a sedative and she went limp in Bellamy’s arms. “Reaper stick. Last dose.” </p><p>“So if this A.L.I.E bitch finds out where we are, she’ll send a horde of mindless humans to catch us?” I raised an eyebrow, knowing that if I hadn’t just seen Raven act this way with my own eyes, I most definitely wouldn’t believe him. Jasper nodded and my eyebrow went up even further, “Damn. Zombie apocalypse, much?” </p><p>“We have to go,” Clarke announced suddenly. </p><p>“Why? A.L.I.E doesn’t know where we are,” Bellamy asked. </p><p>Clarke explained, “Because I know where we can get a wristband.” </p><p>Everyone piled into the rover and we drove quickly to one of the trading posts that we had initially visited while looking for Clarke a few weeks ago. Niylah stood in front of the building, unsheathing a sword and standing ready to fight. </p><p>“I’ll go talk to her,” Clarke decided. </p><p>I nodded, “I’ll come with you.” </p><p>We climbed out of the car and Octavia got out too, looking Niylah up and down. “I thought you said she was a friend?” She eyed the sword in Niylah’s hands. </p><p>“We’ll handle it. Just stay here,” Bellamy sighed. </p><p>I laughed, “No, <em> we’ll </em> handle it,” I gestured to Clarke and myself. “You can stay here.” </p><p>Clarke set off first and I followed her. Niylah was anything but welcoming. “Skaikru is not welcome here, Wanheda,” she spat. </p><p>“Niylah, what’s wrong?” Clarke asked, her brow furrowing in concern. </p><p>Sinclair shouted from the rover, “She’s waking up, hurry! We have to get her inside.” He lifted her up and began to walk quickly towards us, Bellamy in tow. </p><p>“Is your father here?” Clarke asked frantically. </p><p>Niylah glared at her, “My father’s dead, part of an army killed by your people while trying to protect you.” </p><p>I noticed Bellamy’s eyes slowly move towards the ground, unwilling to look at her.</p><p>“Niylah, please,” Clarke pleaded. </p><p>“I said no.” </p><p>Bellamy sighed, raising his gun. “We haven’t got time for this. Move. Move!” </p><p>I elbowed it out of his hands, “That is <em> not </em> how we treat people we want to help us,” I rolled my eyes. </p><p>“Niylah, please, this could affect your people too and we <em> need </em> your help. I promise to explain when we’re inside, <em> please </em>?” I shot a look at the unconscious Raven who was squirming slightly, coming to, without opening her eyes yet— thank god. Niylah sighed, stepping aside so that Sinclair could run in first with Raven. “Thank you,” I whispered. </p><p>“My mom was here, if she was chipped then A.L.I.E will know,” Monty hissed. </p><p>Clarke pointed towards the other end of the hut, “That’s why we’re putting her in the back. Through there.” </p><p>She had woken up by the time we got in there, and it was a team effort to tie her to the bed as she struggled to get up. We had to tie her hands down and she kicked out, trying to attack us. “LET ME GO!” she growled, in a very un-Raven-like way. </p><p>Once we had finished, I walked back out into the shop to see Niylah. Bellamy was hovering next to her, a hand on his gun. “Raise that gun at her again and I’ll shove it—” </p><p>“Up my ass, thanks for that Lyssa,” he rolled his eyes. </p><p>I turned to Niylah, slightly annoyed that Bellamy knew me too well. “Our friend can’t see you under any circumstances. There is something in her brain, and a load of other people’s brains, and they’re all controlled by one person so we’re trying to be very careful. If she finds out that we’re here, they will <em> all </em> come for us. On a completely related note, if anyone ever comes in here asking you if you want to see the City of Light, for the love of god, <em> say no</em>. Also, I’m very sorry about your father.” I hoped that explained it enough. </p><p>Clarke came over, nodding at Bellamy and me to leave to give her some time to talk to her friend. “Niylah,” she began. “We didn’t have a choice.” </p><p>After she had talked to Niylah, Clarke and some of the others went into a separate room to explain how it was going to work. Jasper was taking first watch over Raven so after a while I joined him. I sat down next to him, looking up at Raven as she struggled against the ropes. </p><p>“Come— come on, don’t do that. Raven, what are you doing?” Jasper asked worriedly as Raven pulled on her arm to create enough slack to try and loosen the other rope. Her shoulder popped out of her socket and I almost gagged as me and Jasper simultaneously shot up from our seats to stop her. I watched her and realised that more blood was pooling from her bandages, and she more she stretched, the more likely it was for the wounds to reopen. </p><p>“Shit! We have to stop her,” I rushed forwards as Jasper called for help, grabbing one arm and forcing it back into position as Clarke and Bellamy figured out what to do. I tried to hold her wrist in place to stop her from moving any more but it was no use. </p><p>“A.L.I.E. A.L.I.E. A.L.I.E!” Jasper shouted, “Why are you doing this to her? Let her go.” </p><p>Raven continued to struggle, pulling against us. “I’ll let her go when you give me what I want. The technology that Clarke carries, it belongs to me.” </p><p>“No way,” Clarke replied. </p><p>“Clarke, just give it to her,” Jasper pleaded. </p><p>I looked around, grabbing him, “Is A.L.I.E here?” He nodded and I took a deep breath. “Listen here you psycho computer bitch, if you hurt our friend you are <em> never </em> getting that tech. If you let her die, you can say sayo-fucking-nara. Got it?” </p><p>Raven relaxed, going limp and allowing us to untie her wrists and hold her steady to pop her shoulder back in with a crack before re-bandaging her wrists. Bellamy shot Clarke a worried look, “She’s never going to stop trying to get away. She’ll hurt herself. Someone has to stay with her.” </p><p>“I’ll be first watch,” Clarke announced. “We’ll take turns.” </p><p>“You don’t get to give the orders, Clarke!” Jasper snapped. </p><p>Raven smiled sinisterly, “Guess he doesn’t forgive you for murdering his girlfriend.” </p><p>“Jasper, take a break,” Bellamy advised, following him as he left. Clarke cleaned Raven’s wounds and then after some convincing, I told her to take a break too, and she finally agreed to let me have the first watch.</p><p>I sat down, putting my head in my hands and sighing. </p><p>“So,” not-Raven smiled, “Do you ever think about all the people you’ve murdered? You know, the neighbour, all the Grounders you killed at the camp, the soldiers in Mount Weather, Dax. All of them had families, do you ever think about them?” </p><p>I shrugged, “First of all, I told Raven about Dax in confidence. Second of all, go float yourself A.L.I.E, find someone who gives a shit about your mind games.” </p><p>“Okay, fine. If you don’t want to talk about yourself… let’s talk about Bellamy Blake. You two were pretty close before he decided to join Pike. You must have felt so <em> betrayed </em> when he helped lock you up, or when Pike shot you. How did it feel when he held a gun to your head? You’re so useless, you couldn’t even stop that army from dying. And you got shot for it.”</p><p>“Like I said, I don’t give a shit.”</p><p>“Oh, I know who you give a shit about! Your ex, whatsherface… Astrid! That’s the bitch. I can’t believe she broke up with you because she thought you were a cold-hearted murdering monster! Oh wait, I can. Because it’s true.” </p><p>Now she’d finally hit a sore patch. </p><p>“Shut up, A.L.I.E.” </p><p>“You know where Astrid is now? She’s in the City of Light, with your good friend Raven. Oh, you know who else is there? Your dear old dad. A.L.I.E erased his pain, so I doubt he’d even recognise you since you’re the one who ruined his life,” her smile was sickly sweet and it sent chills down my spine. “Daddy’s little monster. God, if he knew you were going to turn out the way you did, he’d probably have had your mother floated while she was pregnant. Would’ve done us all a favour, wouldn’t it?” </p><p>“Shut. Up.” I whispered through gritted teeth. “Shut up. Shut up. Shut UP.” </p><p>“Oops, have I struck a chord there? My bad, was it the floating your mother part? Probably was, since you blame yourself for her death, don’t you? I mean, if you hadn’t gotten your murderous act together so late and gotten a hold of that gun a year or so earlier, maybe she’d still be alive. I wonder if she’d have even made it to the ground? I heard she loved looking at earth. Too bad she didn’t get the chance to step foot on it. The opportunity was definitely wasted on you. If she was alive, I think she’d agree.” </p><p>“Shut up.” <em> Distract yourself, Alyssa. Don’t let her get to you. </em> I took off my jacket, hoping the cool air would distract me. </p><p>“Oh grow up, get used to it. I mean come <em> on </em> , Alyssa. People die when you’re around, ever heard that? Your stupid decisions get people killed, it’s a fact. You make quick decisions and snap judgements and you project your feelings onto your victims to make it seem like they’re the bad ones, and it’s all <em> completely </em> necessary. That <em> they </em> are the monsters, not you. When are you going to <em> wake up </em> and realise it’s you? It’s always been you? You’re the reason—”</p><p>“Screw you!” I shot up and fastened a piece of material into a gag, trying to pull it over not-Raven’s mouth. “Go to hell!” I screamed, but as I tried to pull the gag up she sank her teeth into my arm. </p><p>Not-Raven laughed, “You’re here, so I must already be there. Is that where you’re hiding me?” </p><p>I cracked, throwing a knife which landed hard, sticking out of the wood on the other side of the room. “You psycho AI bitch! I’ll fucking fry you!” I shrieked, tears streaming down my face as Bellamy practically carried me out of the room, pinning my arms to my side as I tried to fight him. The moment we were out of the room he set me down, trying to calm me down. He placed a hand on my shoulder reassuringly but I shrugged him off, “Leave me alone,” I spat, rubbing the bite-marks on my arm as I limp-stormed out into the cold. </p><p>I rested my hands on the fence and put my head on top of my closed fists. I shouldn’t have let her get to me. I shouldn’t have let her get to me. <em> I shouldn’t have let her get to me. </em> </p><p>Bellamy announced himself by clearing his throat before speaking. “You left your jacket in there… I thought you might be cold.”</p><p>“I’m fine,” I groaned. </p><p>He paused, “So you’re shivering by choice?” </p><p>“Shut up,” I huffed, but without as much of the aggression I’d had when I’d said the same words to A.L.I.E. “I don’t want to talk to you.”</p><p>“Then we don’t have to talk,” he walked over to me, leaning against the fence in a similar way next to where I was. There was a bandage in his hand and I had a feeling it was for the bite-marks but I wasn’t in the mood to take it out of his hands, or accept it if he offered it. </p><p>One of the earlier things that A.L.I.E had said played on my mind on a loop, and I couldn’t help it. “When did you realise Pike had gone too far?” I turned to him, “I know it certainly wasn’t when you helped massacre three hundred Grounders. Was it when Pike tried to attack that other village? Was it when the mission you were leading went south, and Monroe died? Was it when Pike’s actions got the blockade put up? It can’t have been when he shot me, you barely flinched then. I’m not sure what changed your mind, was it Octavia? I know it <em> certainly </em> didn’t happen anytime before you <em> held a gun to my head. </em>” </p><p>Bellamy swallowed, before muttering quietly, “I never would have pulled the trigger.” </p><p>“What was that?” I snapped.</p><p>“I said,” he paused, “I never would have pulled the trigger.” </p><p>“I know. But you were willing to let him, and it might as well have been the same thing.” </p><p>“I wouldn’t.”</p><p>I scoffed, “Damn, could’ve fooled me.” </p><p>Sighing, he took my arm and began to bandage it. Once he was done, he lay my jacket over my shoulders. “You don’t have to like me. In fact, if you hate me I don’t even blame you. But I know the kinds of things that she was saying to you in there, and I know where your mind went. She’s wrong. You’re not a monster. Stay out here, don’t let her get to you, I’m going to go and let her beat me up for a bit.” </p><p>Bellamy disappeared back into the hut and I leant my hands on my fists once more. I wanted to hate him, I so badly wanted to hate him. But I couldn’t. He held a gun to my head to please Pike, and still I couldn’t bring myself to hate him. Is that weak? Maybe. Did I care? Maybe. Did I care about him? Unfortunately, yes. </p><p>Does that make me an idiot? Hmm, the jury's still out on that one.</p><p>Rubbing the cold sweat from my forehead, I limped back inside and spotted Clarke with her head in her hands. I walked over and sat down next to her. “Can I tell you something?” </p><p>She looked up, wiping her eyes, “Sure.” </p><p>“I’ve been meaning to say… I get where Jasper’s coming from, where he’s angry about Maya. But at the same time, you were put in a position where you had to make a hard choice that no one else wanted to make, and you did it. That take’s a hell of a lot of courage. People always expect you to save them, but they can’t ask you to do that if they’re only going to condemn you for how you did it.” I sighed, “What I’m trying to say is… don’t beat yourself up over what happened at Mount Weather, you deserve better than that.”  </p><p>Clarke seemed surprised, and honestly, I wasn’t sure where half of that wisdom came from, but the surprise softened into a small smile and she pulled me into a hug. “Thank you. You don’t know how much I actually needed to hear something like that.” </p><p>“I know what it’s like, beating yourself up over past decisions. The stakes are what make the hard choices hard, sometimes there are no easy choices.”</p><p>Not-Raven’s chilling voice rose a little in volume, and I could hear the words she was saying with frightening clarity. “Gina was already dead when Mount Weather blew up, and you avenged her, right? I mean you picked up a gun and slaughtered an army that was sent to protect us. An army that had nothing to do with blowing sweet Gina to bits but, hey, a Grounder’s a Grounder, right?” </p><p>“Shit,” I shot up at the same time as Clarke. Niylah had already passed us, storming into the room. </p><p>“My father— you—” </p><p>“Niylah,” Bellamy’s eyes were full of grief. </p><p>“You killed him,” she spat. </p><p>I limped in, Clarke only slightly ahead of me as she looked between them, but my eyes were focused on Raven. “Niylah, Niylah! You can’t be in here,” Clarke reached for her moments after she slapped Bellamy, the awful crack as her palm made contact with his face resounding through the wood.</p><p>“It’s too late. Raven’s already seen her,” Jasper whispered. “A.L.I.E knows we’re here.” </p><p>Bellamy grabbed his jacket and stormed out, and I followed after him, watching the tail end of his anger explode as he slammed his fist into a cart. He winced in pain, cradling it with his other hand as his face filled with regret. I decided to give him a minute and went back inside to grab a makeshift bandage for his hand. </p><p>I heard the rover pull up and went outside to investigate but Monty pushed past me on his way in, taking the rucksack to the work table and slamming it down. I walked as fast as I could— which still wasn’t very fast— to Octavia. “What the hell happened out there?” </p><p>“A.L.I.E found us… through Monty’s mom. She almost killed me and he saved my life,” Octavia said quietly. </p><p>We all went back inside and by the time the EMP was ready to fry that computer bitch out of Raven’s head, it was a team effort to get it done. There was a person on each limb, holding her still and Octavia had to force her head against the back of the bed to stop her from trying to kill herself. Monty and Sinclair tried to force the bracelet on her but she wouldn’t stop moving. </p><p>Clarke had an idea, “Stop, and I’ll give you this.” She held up the small device that A.L.I.E had been after. Raven froze, just long enough for Sinclair to clamp the bracelet down on her wrist. </p><p>“You lied! You lied!” She screamed, before changing tactics at the last second. “No, don’t! The EMP will give me brain damage, you know it will. Please don’t do this. Please, you know it will! Sinclair! Stop! Sinclair, no!” </p><p>“We’ve only got one shot at this,” he announced. “The EMP will fry the wristband too.” Sinclair flipped the switch. </p><p>And nothing happened. </p><p>
  <em> Fuck. </em>
</p><p>“It’s not working, the battery isn’t strong enough!” He cursed. </p><p>Clarke looked at him, “Well then get one that is!” </p><p>“The rover!” Monty cried out, rushing away back to the vehicle. </p><p>“Sinclair, hold her!” I shouted, trying to keep Raven’s arm from reopening her wrist wounds again as Bellamy ran after Monty. </p><p>There was a crash outside, but I ignored it, and moments later Bellamy and Monty came running in with the battery. </p><p>“Guys, we have to move! Move!” Bellamy shouted. </p><p>Monty plugged in the battery and flicked the switch. Raven let out a scream before going completely limp. Clarke checked her pulse, “She’s still breathing.” </p><p>But she refused to wake up.</p><p>“Come on, Raven. Wake up, please,” Clarke pleaded, shaking her. </p><p>Jasper grabbed a bat from the side and the small device— the flame, Clarke had called it— raising the bat above his head. “A.L.I.E did that to Raven so she’s never going to get this!” </p><p>“Don’t! Stop!” Clarke pleaded with him but he was prepared to bring the bat down. She stopped shouting for it, her voice dropping low but still with the same pleading tone, “It’s Lexa. Part of her’s still in there. I saw them cut it out of her head. I’m not—” she paused. </p><p>“What is it?” Monty asked, noticing the look on her face as she thought. </p><p>“Both the AIs were made by the same person. Both tap into human consciousness. They must work similarly, right?” She turned to Sinclair. </p><p>He thought it over, “There’s probably only one path to consciousness so that’s possible, yeah.” </p><p>“What does this have to do with anything?” Octavia asked. </p><p>“I’ve seen an AI get removed before. Help me get her on her side,” Clarke decided. “Get that medkit from my bag.” With help, she turned Raven over and pulled out the scalpel from the medkit. Sinclair was hesitant, but reluctantly agreed and Clarke made a small incision on the back of Raven’s neck. Blood spilt out, but so did a weird clear goop. </p><p>“What is that?” Bellamy asked. </p><p>“It must be whatever’s left of the chip!” Sinclair realised. </p><p>After a few seconds, Raven began to cough and stir. “Ow,” she groaned. </p><p>“Never thought I’d be so happy to see someone in pain,” Octavia laughed, relieved. </p><p>Raven laughed too, groaning at her shoulder. I looked around the room at the various expressions of relief, but my eyes fell on Monty, and all I could see on his face was regret. He turned away slowly, raking a hand through his hair. “I could have saved my mom,” he whispered. </p><p>“Hey,” Jasper put a hand on his friend’s shoulder to comfort him, but Monty snapped and pushed him off. </p><p>“Get the hell away from me,” he muttered as he left the room, leaving us in silence. </p><p>It was broken shortly after by Bellamy, “A.L.I.E knows we’re here. We’ve got to move.” </p><p>Clarke put the flame back in its box and Sinclair wrapped a sling around Raven’s arm before picking her up to carry her to the rover. I picked up a gun and limped along, pausing to pull out the bandage I’d grabbed for Bellamy before the rover got back. I tugged on his arm and wrapped it around his hand, only speaking once I had finished. “You’ll recover,” I whispered quietly. </p><p>“Will I?” </p><p>“There’s only one way to find out,” I nodded towards the rover and began to walk, but before I reached it I turned back around. “I don’t hate you, Bellamy. I tried… but it refused to stick.” A half-smile for a half-joke. “Like a switch that’s stuck on ‘on’, even after all this I can’t help but trust you. I lied back at Arkadia, the night before Pike got elected. I’m always going to have your back, whether you like it or not.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>ALIE!Raven gives me chills.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Returning to Arkadia</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Almost dying at least three times a week is starting to get stressful." </p><p>"Starting?"</p><p>"Was it not stressful before?"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Before we left Niylah’s, Clarke approached Raven as Sinclair and Jasper helped her into the rover. “Hey, there’s something I don’t understand. Why did A.L.I.E want you to kill yourself?” She asked. </p><p>“Because I know why she wanted the second AI,” Raven explained. </p><p>Bellamy’s brow furrowed, “Why?” </p><p>“It’s the only thing that can stop her.” </p><p>Octavia smiled, “Then let’s stop her. We survive together.” </p><p>~</p><p>“Becca’s journal is amazing,” Raven gushed in awe as she flicked through the book, “At twenty-six, she found a pathway to access a human mind. That same year she had to lock up A.L.I.E because her answer for what was wrong with the world was ‘too many people’. She was twenty-seven when it launched the bombs.” </p><p>Clarke turned around from the front seat, “What did she write about the flame?” </p><p>“A.L.I.E 2.0,” Raven explained, “She saw it as a way to atone for her sins. She designed it to not just access a human mind, but to merge with one. It could never wipe us out because it would be one of us. She would put it in herself first. Altered her genes so her body wouldn’t reject the implant.” </p><p>“Bekka Pramheda,” Clarke nodded, “The first Commander. The gene therapy made her blood black, didn’t it?” </p><p>“Yeah,” Raven looked at her strangely, “How did you know that?”</p><p>“Nightblood, that’s where it came from. Somehow it became hereditary. Luna has it, that’s why we have to find her. If she can access A.L.I.E Two—” </p><p>“Then she can tell us how to stop A.L.I.E One,” Octavia finished for her. </p><p>“Bekka Pramheda gets her second shot at atonement,” Sinclair remarked. </p><p>Monty turned the flame over in his hands, “Get back to the mind pathway. If A.L.I.E uses it to upload our minds to the city of light, then there’s a chance my mom’s still alive.” His voice went up slightly at the end of the sentence, as if it was more of a hopeful question than a note. </p><p>“That depends on your definition of alive,” Raven replied. </p><p>“Eyes sharp, weapons hot. We’re almost home,” Bellamy announced, turning the steering wheel as we made it across the fields. He picked up the radio, “Miller, come in.” There was no response, and I saw worry flicker across his face in the rear-view mirror, “Harper, you there? Ride’s two minutes out.” </p><p>Still no response. </p><p>Jasper swallowed, “Good start.” </p><p>We arrived back with Monty swapping with Bellamy so that a few of the others could move alongside the car with guns while he drove the rover in. </p><p>“We left two days ago, why haven’t they fixed the gate?” Clarke asked, puzzled. </p><p>“Maybe because there’s no one here to fix it,” Jasper replied matter-of-factly. I popped up through the turret next to him, there was barely room for two people but it just about worked. </p><p>“It’s like a ghost town,” Raven noted. </p><p>Bellamy picked up his radio, “Miller, where the hell are you?” No response. <em> Still. </em> “I don’t like this,” he whispered quietly. </p><p>“Maybe they got chipped?” Jasper suggested. </p><p>I shook my head, “If they’d been chipped, then they’d have been waiting for us at the cave.” </p><p>“Maybe they saw the open gate and went in for Lincoln’s book?” Jasper suggested instead. </p><p>Octavia sighed. “Maybe you should stop saying ‘maybe’.” </p><p>“If they are chipped, A.L.I.E already knows we’re coming,” Clarke told us as the rover rolled to a halt. </p><p>Octavia’s eyes grazed over the ground, pausing at a spot in the mud tinged with red. I recognised it even up close. <em> That was the spot where Lincoln died. </em> Bellamy stopped completely, staring at it, and Clarke had to nudge him to keep moving. “Let’s get Lincoln’s book and get the hell out of here,” Octavia decided. </p><p>Jasper nodded next to me, “That’s a plan I can support.” </p><p>“Ditto,” I acknowledged. </p><p>The hangar-turned-garage door opened slowly and I climbed out the back before Monty turned the vehicle around, in case we needed a quick getaway. </p><p>“We’re in and out,” Bellamy ordered. “Pack as much gear as you can into the rover.” </p><p>“I’ll get the map,” Octavia announced. </p><p>Jasper followed her, “I’ll go with her… no one should be alone.” </p><p>Sinclair laughed, “Don’t want to load gear, huh?” </p><p>“Not even a little,” he replied truthfully. </p><p>“What’s the rush?” Raven asked, “They won’t be coming back.” </p><p>Clarke sighed, “How do you know?” </p><p>“A.L.I.E’s mission is to chip everyone. It wouldn’t make sense to return to a place she already took,” she explained. </p><p>Sinclair frowned, “Might make sense if there were someone in that place, i.e. you, who could tell us stuff like that.” </p><p>“Good point. Let’s load gear,” Raven agreed.</p><p>“Medical supplies?” I suggested, “Taking a trip there might prove useful.” </p><p>Bellamy nodded, “Good idea. Armory first?”</p><p>I agreed, following him out of the garage and leaving the others behind. I picked my gun up again and slung it over my shoulder, limping along slowly after Bellamy. We went inside and the small shed was filled with pistols, automatic rifles, and bullets. “Holy shit… we just got lucky,” I muttered, smiling, stuffing a pistol down the waistband of my cargo pants and bullets inside every available pocket. </p><p>He pulled out the walkie, “Everyone finish what you’re doing and meet me at the armory.” </p><p>“Why?” Clarke was the first to answer, “What’s going on?” </p><p>“You’ll see when you get here,” he smiled. “We just got lucky.” </p><p>“On our way,” Clarke replied. </p><p>“Bellamy, I need a hand,” I called as I used my good leg to climb up onto the table in the corner, standing on my tiptoes and fumbling around in the blind space between the wall and the roof until I pulled out a knife, pumping my fist in the air in relief before topping over backwards into his arms. “Thanks,” I breathed. </p><p>“Where <em> don’t </em> you have knives?” He laughed, steadying me and putting me down. </p><p>I paused for a second, trying to think of an answer. “You. I haven’t stashed any on you,” I replied. </p><p>“Do you normally stash them on people?” His lip curled up, amused. </p><p>“Yes,” I answered with a smile, “Sneak attack concealed sling knife? There’s on inside Raven’s sling and I’m not entirely sure I remembered to tell her that I put it there before we left Niylah’s…” </p><p>Bellamy rolled his eyes, “Honestly, Lyss… Keep watch while I sort these out?”</p><p>I nodded, waiting outside while Bellamy organised the weapons. Coming out of the main station, I heard coughing and spun around to see Clarke running towards me, struggling to breathe. “Bellamy get out here,” I called, catching Clarke as she grabbed me to keep herself upright. I had to pass her off to him as he rushed out, unable to take her weight on my bad leg. </p><p>“What is it?” He caught her, looking at her worriedly. “What’s going on?” </p><p>She took a few seconds to catch her breath before replying, “<em>Emerson</em>.”</p><p>“Not <em> that </em> son of a bitch!” I cursed.</p><p>“Yes, <em> him</em>,” Clarke replied, her voice tainted with disgust. “And he’s got Monty.”</p><p>~</p><p>We walked the corridors of Alpha Station slowly, trying not to draw as little attention to our movements as possible. “Why would he take them?” Clarke whispered to herself, but I honestly couldn’t answer. </p><p>“Octavia, come in,” Bellamy turned on the radio, but there was no reply. She had gone MIA just the same as Miller, Bryan and Harper. </p><p>“Jasper was with her,” I remembered. </p><p>“Jasper are you there? Say something,” he tried again. <em> Nothing. </em></p><p>Clarke shook her head, “Miller… Harper… Bryan… this is all my fault. I let Emerson live.” </p><p>“What are you talking about?” Bellamy asked. </p><p>“In Polis, I had a chance to kill him, and I let him go,” she explained. </p><p>The radio flickered into life and Raven’s voice echoed through the empty hall, “Bellamy, what’s wrong?” </p><p>“Raven, are you okay? Where are you?” He asked her. </p><p>Raven replied, concerned. “We’re fine, what’s wrong?”</p><p>“Emerson is here. Are the others with you?” Clarke whispered. </p><p>“Negative,” Raven replied, “Just Sinclair. Mount Weather Emerson?” </p><p>Clarke nodded, “Yes. Ok. Lock down the hangar bay. Don’t let anyone in but us.” </p><p>I held my hand out and she passed me the radio, “Raven, I probably should have told you this earlier but now would be a good time to check your sling for hidden knives. Just a thought,” I added. </p><p>We reached the hangar but the power went out, all three of us pounding on the door trying to open it. Bellamy cursed, muttering something about the automatic lock not working without power. “Raven!” </p><p>“The outer door,” Clarke realised and we made our way as fast as possible to it. It was open a fraction, but not all the way as if they had tried but been interrupted presumably by Emerson. </p><p>“Raven? Sinclair?” Bellamy hissed, aiming his gun through the gap first before squeezing through. “After me,” he whispered. </p><p>I followed after, my hand flying over my mouth in shock when I spotted Sinclair on the floor, already dead and bleeding out through a wound in his abdomen. Clarke knelt down next to him, checking his pulse before closing his eyes. </p><p>Bellamy swallowed loudly, “We’re too late.” </p><p>“No we’re not,” Clarke replied, and I wasn’t quite able to tell if she was reassuring us or herself. “He didn’t kill Monty or Raven. He would have left their bodies. He took them somewhere.” </p><p>I took a deep breath, “You didn’t kill him in Polis, and you regret that. But do you know what the difference is between killing someone and regretting it, and <em> not </em> killing someone and regretting it? If you decide not to kill someone and regret that decision, you can always come back and kill them later. Let’s go.” </p><p>“Really? That’s the optimism you’re going with here?” Bellamy raised an eyebrow and I swatted his arm. </p><p>“What? They can’t all be winners, but I’m not exactly wrong, am I? So where could he have taken them?” </p><p>“They could be anywhere,” Bellamy thought. “Does he even know his way around?”</p><p>“He was here. You were in Mount Weather. <em> The airlock</em>,” Clarke realised. She picked up the radio, “Emerson, I know you’re listening. We need to talk.” </p><p>“I don’t <em> need </em> to do anything,” he replied instantly. “You should’ve killed me when you had the chance.” </p><p>Clarke sighed, “And now you’re here to kill me, is that it?” </p><p>“Something like that,” Emerson replied.</p><p>“Then let my friends go,” she told him. “Do that, and you can have me.” </p><p>“You’re brave, Clarke. I’ll give you that,” he remarked. </p><p>Bellamy looked over to her, “Clarke—” </p><p>“I know what I’m doing,” she whispered back. </p><p>“They’re lucky to have a friend like you. Come to the airlock, no weapons, right now,” ordered Emerson. </p><p>Clarke began to walk towards the door but I grabbed her by the arm, “What the hell are you doing?” </p><p>“Saving them. Look,” she pulled out the flame. “When it’s over, take this to Luna. Raven will know what to do with it. Promise me.” </p><p>“No—” Bellamy began. </p><p>“Absolutely <em> not</em>,” I warned. </p><p>“You’re out of your mind if you think we’re letting you do this alone,” he told her. </p><p>Clarke sighed again, “This is <em> my </em> fault. I’m not letting anyone else die for my mistake, ok. So take it.” She tried to hand him the flame but he stepped back, refusing to take it. </p><p>“I don’t know what happened between you and Emerson in Polis, but I do know that letting him kill you here today is a stupid plan,” Bellamy folded his arms. </p><p>“I second that. I mean what do you think’s going to happen here? We’re just going to let you walk to your death? We’d obviously follow you anyway, so you might as well agree. Plus, this is <em> Emerson </em> we’re talking about. I have a strong feeling that he’s just going to kill you and then everyone else either way,” I raised an eyebrow. “And obviously we can’t let that happen either.” </p><p>She looked at us, giving in. “Do either of you have a better plan?” </p><p>“Distract him. We shoot him,” Bellamy suggested with a shrug and a small smile. </p><p>Clarke nodded, returning his smile with an even smaller one of her own. “Let’s do it.” </p><p>~</p><p>Clarke walked on ahead, her hands raised in surrender. Bellamy and I had guns raised, walking— or in my case, limping— a few feet behind. She rounded the final corner and we held back, waiting for the right moment. </p><p>“I held up my part of the deal,” she told him. “Your turn. Let my friends go.” </p><p>“Tell Bellamy to show himself first,” he ordered.</p><p>She protested, “I don’t know what you're talking—” but he cut her off, punching Octavia in the stomach and making her cry out. Bellamy appeared almost immediately, gun trained on Emerson. </p><p>“Don’t,” he warned, but I could tell by the look on his face that the man was holding a knife to his sister’s throat. </p><p>“Good. Now take out the clip and throw it down the hall. Put the gun on the ground and get inside,” Emerson ordered. </p><p>“Please, you wanted me. I’ll get inside once you let them go,” Clarke pleaded. </p><p>Emerson took no notice of her, “I was talking to Bellamy.” Octavia let out another more quiet cry of pain and Bellamy raised his hands in surrender. </p><p>“Okay, okay. Just stop,” he followed the instructions and tossed his clip down the hall towards me, putting his gun down on the floor and following it with the other two knives he apparently had on him. Bellamy walked into the airlock and Emerson directed him to the restraints. </p><p>“Now we’ve got you out of the way, where’s the other one?” He asked. </p><p>“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Clarke replied slowly. </p><p>Emerson sighed, “The other girl. I heard her on the radio. She comes in too or no deal. In fact, she has ten seconds or I stick this knife in someone. Ten… nine… eight…” </p><p>I groaned, “God, you’re annoying. Okay, I’m coming.” I stepped out from around the corner with my arms raised. “Give me a minute, okay?” I asked, as I removed the clip from the gun, tossing it and the one Bellamy had thrown to me down the hall. I put the rifle down next to where he had laid his, and took the pistol out of the back of my waistband and laid it next to it, along with three of my most obvious knives. Raising my hands again, I walked towards the airlock. </p><p>“Those belong to you,” he nodded in the direction of the only free pair of restraints. </p><p>I rolled my eyes, “Gee, thanks,” as I slid my hands in and locked the cuffs. </p><p>Once I had finished, Emerson pulled out a gun and aimed it at Clarke, “Get on your knees, Clarke. Put your hands behind your head.” </p><p>On one side of me, Octavia struggled and kicked, trying to break free of the cuffs holding her hands in place. On the other side, Bellamy was craning his neck to look at Clarke as she complied with Emerson’s orders. I put my head next to my hands and bit my sleeve, using it to pull it up so that I could just about reach my fingers inside with my other hand. Fumbling around blindly, I caught hold of the hairpin and slid it out slowly. </p><p>Emerson kept his gun trained on Clarke as he stepped out of the airlock, shutting the electronic door behind him. He walked over to her and pressed the gun to the back of her head, pulling her with him and throwing her against the airlock door so that she could see all of our faces. I struggled against the cuffs, desperately waiting to hear the clicking sound as they popped open. </p><p>Clarke struggled against Emerson but he had an arm around her neck and the gun pressed to the other side of her head so there wasn’t much she could do. I could read his lips through the glass, “You murdered three hundred and eighty one people. You took the lives of my children, my brother, my friends. Did you really think that I would be happy with just one life in return?” He pulled her away from the glass, keeping the gun touching her head. </p><p>
  <em> Click. </em>
</p><p>I looked up at my hands and realised the cuffs had popped open. I blinked in surprise, “Well this is an interesting turn of events.” </p><p>Emerson opened the control panel and pressed the big red button. The thing with big red buttons is that usually it’s <em> bad </em> when you push them. I figured that this was true for this one as well as the electronic speaker announced, “Airlock five, oxygen venting,” and the air began to be slowly sucked from my lungs. </p><p>
  <em> Fuck. </em>
</p><p>The air in the room slowly diminished and everyone began to gasp, trying to suck as much oxygen into their lungs as possible but that only made the process faster. I tried to concentrate, keep calm, but truthfully there was no way out. </p><p>I’d gotten out of those damned cuffs for nothing. </p><p>The panel was only operational from outside and even as Emerson freaked out and Clarke pushed him back, he pulled her away before she had the chance to press the release button, leaning over her and choking her as the rest of us slowly fell unconscious inside the airlock. I tried to stay awake, but the red light flashing was the last thing I saw as I clipped my wrist back into the handcuffs so that I wouldn’t fall. </p><p>~</p><p>I blinked my eyes open, gasping for air and trying to think. What had happened? <em> Emerson. Emerson happened. </em> I coughed and realised the door was open, that Clarke had done it, as the others began to come to. Everyone desperately tried to get as much oxygen as possible back into their bodies as I unlocked the cuffs again and almost fell to the ground as I tried to get my balance. </p><p>Reaching over, I unlocked Octavia’s cuffs and lowered her to the floor as she regained consciousness, moving on to Raven and Harper before Bellamy so that when I got him down he didn’t fall on her. Once they were both free, I scrambled over to the other side to unlock Miller, Monty, Jasper and Bryan, before collapsing against the wall in exhaustion. </p><p>“Shit,” I coughed, “Almost dying at least three times each week is starting to get fucking <em> stressful</em>.”</p><p>Jasper shot me a mildly concerned look, “<em>Starting </em> to get stressful?” </p><p>Harper seconded it, “Was it not stressful before?” </p><p>I shrugged, “I suppose we’ll get used to it.” </p><p>“I don’t want to get used to it,” Monty shook his head, horrified. “I really don’t want to have to get used to it.”  </p><p>~</p><p>We gathered the equipment and went outside. It must have rained at some point while we were in the airlock because the air felt fresh and the ground damp. For a moment, I realised Bellamy had disappeared, but he emerged not long after, carrying something in his arms. On closer inspection, I realised it was a body wrapped in fabric. <em> Lincoln’s </em> body.</p><p>He laid it down and took a few steps back, letting Octavia say her final goodbyes and plant a kiss on Lincoln’s forehead, tracing her finger over his cold lips before breaking into loud sobs. As a group, we began to build a funeral pyre for him and Sinclair.</p><p>Once it was finished, the bodies were rested on top and Octavia stood beside it, holding the lit torch in her hands. <em> “Yu gonplei ste odon,” </em>she announced. </p><p><em> “Yu gonplei ste odon,” </em> we repeated, watching as the flames engulfed them. </p><p>“It’s time to go, I’ll get the map,” Octavia shouted over the roar of the flames before disappearing. The rest of us took that as a cue to leave and slowly dispersed. Raven tapped my arm and nodded towards Alpha Station. </p><p>“I’ve got something for you,” she whispered. We limped along in sync until we got to her old workspace where she produced a leg brace. “It’s not like mine because I need it for total function and not support, but this should help you get around a little easier for now.” </p><p>I slipped it on, testing it out, “Thanks. We should probably get ready to go.” </p><p>“I’m not coming,” she explained. “My leg hurts and my shoulder is killing me, but my <em> brain </em> is all kinds of awesome. I think when we took A.L.I.E out she left something behind— nothing bad, I swear— but I think it can help me take her down. Plus, I remember her saying something about having downloaded herself onto the Ark mainframe, so if I can hack that then maybe I can hack <em> her. </em>” Raven finished defiantly, a slight smirk on her face. </p><p>I smiled, “Wicked… but we should probably tell the others.” </p><p>Once we got to the garage, Raven explained and Monty volunteered to stay behind with them. </p><p>“Miller—” Bellamy began, but Miller understood. </p><p>“We’ll keep ‘em safe,” he promised.</p><p>Harper sighed, “And I’ll keep <em> them </em> safe,” which prompted a small laugh from Raven and a scowl from Miller. </p><p>“How about you?” Bellamy turned to Jasper, “It’s gonna be dangerous.” </p><p>Jasper smiled, “You know me well. I’m in.” </p><p>“And…?” Bellamy looked at me, waiting to see where I stand. </p><p>I rolled my eyes, “If you think I’m letting you guys go without me then you are <em> delusional</em>, my friend.” I laughed, picking up a pistol and tucking it into my waistband before eyeing another automatic rifle as we said our goodbyes. </p><p>I pulled Monty into a reluctant hug, “Be careful. Don’t die.” </p><p>“I’m pretty sure I should be saying that to you,” he mumbled, squeezing me back eventually. </p><p>Once we were done, I picked up the rifle and climbed into the back of the rover next to Jasper and Octavia. We were going to find Luna using a map that doesn’t have any distances. What could go wrong?</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Safe Passage</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"God, you look an absolute state."</p><p>"You're not too bad yourself."</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Tires screeched as the rover thundered through the forest. Jasper traced Lincoln’s map with his finger. “It’s been about an hour since we passed the airplane wreckage, and seeing as we’re using a map without any distances it could be days before we reach Luna’s village.”</p><p>“At least we know we’re going in the right direction,” Bellamy replied. </p><p>Jasper sighed, “We’re running out of daylight. We should stop and recharge the batteries.” </p><p>“What sun? We keep going until it dies,” Clarke answered with an air of finality that none of us wanted to object to. </p><p>“We keep going until we get to Luna,” Octavia added.</p><p>The rain poured down around us and the thunder was louder than ever, but we continued driving. Jasper thumbed through the pages of Lincoln’s notebook, pausing when he got to a drawing. “This her?” He held it up to Octavia. </p><p>“Yes,” she replied. </p><p>“What do you think she’s gonna say when we show up asking to put an AI in her head?” Jasper asked jokingly. </p><p>Octavia seemed to take offence, “Lincoln said she helps those that are in trouble. She’ll help us too.” </p><p>Jasper laughed, “Do you think she can help us find a better map?”</p><p>Without warning the rover suddenly skidded to a halt and I was thrown forwards. Bellamy groaned, “We should backtrack. Find somewhere where the trees aren’t so bad,” he suggested, but Octavia was already climbing out the back. </p><p>“Anyone hear the part where I said it could be days?” Jasper reminded me as we followed her, leaving the rover behind and beginning to make the trek through the rain. </p><p>“Stop!” Octavia held up a hand, turning around with an excited smile on her face. “You hear that?” </p><p>“The rain…?” I suggested, but once I concentrated I realised it was faster than the rain, “Shit, it's actual water.”</p><p>Clarke and Octavia rushed up the hill, leaving Bellamy, Jasper, and I trying not to breathe in the dust they kicked up. Bellamy shouted to them, “Eyes sharp. They could be hostile,” as a warning, but Octavia turned around and snapped. </p><p>“They’re not hostile! Put the guns down.” </p><p>With a sigh, he lowered his weapon and we began to climb the small hill. Hills were… not my strong suit. Especially wet hills. With mud. And a dodgy leg. I yelped as I slipped, and if Bellamy hadn’t had such good balance then I probably would have taken him back down with me. He grabbed my arm and kept me upright and I smiled in thanks, regaining my footing and following the others with the fastest speed-walking I could manage. </p><p>Octavia led the way, climbing over trees and sliding down the other side of the hill to reveal a large, open expanse of water. Jasper looked around, “Where’s the village?” </p><p>She looked at the notebook again as the rain subsided, pointing at something on the map and looking at a specific piece of land before setting off towards it at a run. “No… it can’t be.” </p><p>We followed her, looking around at the clearing. It was muddy, surrounded with rocks balanced on top of each other. Jasper raised an eyebrow, “It’s not a village, it’s just a bunch of rocks.” </p><p>“No… she’s gone,” Clarke cursed. </p><p>“What now?” I asked, looking up in time to see Octavia scream into the wind in frustration. <em> We’re so screwed. </em></p><p>~</p><p>I returned with some more firewood, tossing it onto the pile before watching Octavia try to light the kindling. Once she had succeeded, the whole set up of timber caught alight and I was more than impressed. </p><p>Clarke stood up, “It’ll be dark soon. We need to talk about what we’re gonna do.” </p><p>“We wait until first light,” Octavia ordered, “And then we split up and search the shore in both directions.” </p><p>“I agree. Lincoln wouldn’t have put this spot on the map unless it was important,” Bellamy reached for the notebook but Octavia smacked his hand away. </p><p>“<em>Don’t </em> touch that.” </p><p>The fire crackled in the background as he squatted next to her, “Come on, O. How long?” </p><p>“I don’t know,” she replied curtly. “I can’t even look at you… because every time I do, I see Pike putting that gun to Lincoln’s head. I hear the gunshot. I see him fall.” </p><p>“I didn’t kill Lincoln,” Bellamy whispered. </p><p>Octavia stood up, tears welling in her eyes. “No, but he is dead because of you.” </p><p>“I came to you. You didn’t take my help. If you had just trusted me, I—” </p><p>She ignored him, letting his words vanish into thin air as he walked off. Clarke looked after him before turning back to the fire, just as Jasper threw in a piece of a plant from the ground, turning the flames a vibrant green briefly before they returned to their usual orange. </p><p>“What did you just do?” Octavia stared at him. </p><p>“Nothing…” he held up a branch. “I just threw these in the fire.” </p><p>Clarke watched Octavia as she picked up the book and flicked through it frantically, “What is it?” </p><p>Octavia pulled out an identical plant cutting from the journal and tossed it into the flames, making them green again as a result. She laughed in relief, “Signal fire. He was trying to tell us. This is how we contact Luna.” </p><p>“Let’s go get more then,” I nodded to Jasper and he took the closer areas while I grabbed a handful and tossed it next to the fire for Octavia to use. The sun had begun to set and I looked down the beach to see Bellamy getting further and further away. </p><p>I followed him, leaving Clarke, Octavia and Jasper to tend to the fire. I had to admit, following him down the beach wasn’t the <em> best </em> idea, the soft sand kept sinking below my feet and my balance wasn’t brilliant with my bad leg. I tried sticking to the harder stones instead, but they were even harder to walk on and I let out another yelp as my feet slid out from under me. I closed my eyes and sighed before trying to get back up, but when I opened them again Bellamy was in front of me, holding out a hand. </p><p>I took it gratefully and laughed, “I came here to see if <em> you </em> were okay, and you ended up helping me.” He guided me away from the stones and towards a large fallen tree to sit on. </p><p>It was quiet for a bit. Too far away from the others to hear if they were saying anything, too close to the sea to focus on anything other than the waves. We didn’t move, only sitting there inches apart and watching the horizon. </p><p>Bellamy broke the silence, sparing a glance towards the signal fire that the others were making. “I’ve lost her,” he whispered. </p><p>“Give her time. Look, you can’t try and justify your position in this because it only seems like you’re passing the blame. That’s one of the other reasons why she’s mad. Yes, there is blood on your hands, but it’s not Lincoln’s,” I tried to reassure him. </p><p>His voice cracked slightly, “Some of it is.” </p><p>“You tried to stop it. You didn’t want that to happen, and maybe if she did let you help then things might have played out differently. But you can’t blame her for not trusting you.” I sighed, “It’s been a crazy few weeks, and everyone seemed to think that they were doing what was right, even when it all conflicted. In reality, I don’t think any of us were completely on the right track, some were closer than others maybe… but we all thought we knew what was best, when really none of us did.” </p><p>“You’re like a firecracker, I knew you wouldn’t stand for what Pike was trying to do. I knew you’d try and stop us and I got angry at you for it. I hated it. I held a gun to your <em> head</em>, Alyssa,” he turned away and wiped his face, raking a hand through his still-damp hair. </p><p>“Don’t beat yourself up over it. Besides, you said it yourself… you wouldn’t have pulled the trigger.” </p><p>“I still held it here. I still let Pike shoot you.”</p><p>I sighed, “I’m pretty sure I punished you enough with all the guilt-tripping insults while I was recovering… you don’t need to keep punishing yourself.” </p><p>“I helped Pike kill three hundred innocent Grounders sent there to protect us.” </p><p>“You did, I can’t deny it,” I said frankly. “But there’s no point in continuing to hate yourself for something that you can’t change. Instead, you need to think about the good that you can do from now on, like finding Luna. We can’t do this without you. Bellamy, we need you.” </p><p>He nodded, stepping down from the tree and offering me a hand to steady me as I did the same. Before I stepped down, I realised that we were at eye level for once and I was able to take in his injuries. </p><p>“God, you look an absolute state,” I couldn’t help but announce, wiping away some of the dried blood with my thumb and trying to flatten his hair slightly, which was currently an impossible task as the rain combined with his frustrated running his hands through it had made it stand up at all angles.</p><p>He laughed, “You’re not too bad yourself,” as he pulled a small leaf out of my hair. </p><p>“A few days ago, I was telling Miller, Harper, and Bryan about that time in that underground garage when you had to pick glass out of my hair after I shot through a sunroof,” I tried to hide my grin and failed.</p><p>“You’re giving me déjà vu, Lyss,” he smiled, remembering the incident in question. </p><p>Without warning, I threw my arms around his neck in a hug, catching him off guard and causing him to stagger backwards a few steps, laughing. He wrapped his arms around me, burying his face in my shoulder and I closed my eyes and did the same in his. </p><p>“It’s not just Octavia, we’re <em> all </em> your family now, okay?” </p><p>“Okay,” Bellamy replied, muffled by my jacket. </p><p>A thought occurred to me, “You can’t just let go yet, you have to physically put me down because you are taller and I did <em> not </em> think this through. There’s a large chance I might fall over.” </p><p>He set me down and steadied me before removing his arms, but something caught the corner of his eye and he slowly turned his head towards it. I wondered what it was, doing the same and coming face to face with a small hoard of people wearing diving gear as they emerged from the water with weapons. Bellamy reached for his gun and I tried to land a punch but they took us to the ground quickly and covered our mouths, gagging us and binding our hands behind our backs. </p><p>They hauled us towards the fire and made to throw us to our knees, but Jasper stopped them just in time. “Don’t! She’s injured, don’t make her kneel.” They pushed Bellamy onto his knees and kept a firm grasp on my arm instead. I spat out the gag and mouthed a ‘thank you’ to Jasper.</p><p>Someone who I assumed must have been the leader, rounded on Octavia. <em> “Who are you? Why did you signal?” </em> He asked in Trig with what was possibly the deepest voice I had ever heard. </p><p><em>“I am Octavia of Skaikru and I seek safe passage,” </em> she replied. </p><p>“Skaikru,” the man switched to English, “Bringers of death. Why should we give you safe passage?” </p><p>Octavia’s confidence was unwavering, “Lincoln. He sent us.” </p><p>The Grounder called to his friends behind us and they began to untie our hands so that we could pull the gags off. </p><p>“What’s going on?” I hissed to Octavia. </p><p>“I don’t know,” she whispered back quickly, her eyes following the leader as he moved. He handed her a small vial and she turned it over in her hands. </p><p>Clarke watched it suspiciously, “What the hell is that?” </p><p>“Safe passage,” the man replied, as if it explained everything. </p><p>Jasper eyed it eagerly, intrigued, “What does it do?” The man handed him a vial of his own just as Octavia uncorked hers, downing it in one. </p><p>“Octavia, wait!” Bellamy tried to stop her but he hadn’t been quick enough. </p><p>“I trust Lincoln,” she replied. </p><p>The man held out a vial to each of us in turn and I held it up to the light to look at it, “If only she drinks,” he explained, “Only she goes.” </p><p>I shrugged, opening and sniffing it, but before I had the chance to take any, Jasper poured the liquid down his throat. “See you on the other side,” he winked. He looked at Octavia, but she began to sway before falling to the ground. Jasper’s eyes went wide, “Crap. Oh, god…” he trailed off, falling to the floor. </p><p>“Last chance,” the man warned, and I took one last look at Bellamy and Clarke before emptying the vial’s contents into my mouth and pulling a face. </p><p>I gagged, “Fuck, that’s… that’s <em> nasty</em>,” pitching sideways into one of the men as I fell unconscious. </p><p>~</p><p>I lifted my head from where it was against the cold ground, blinking my eyes slowly open. I was suddenly overcome with shivers, wrapping my arms tight around myself in an attempt to warm up when I realised my jacket was gone. “What the fuck? Where are we?” Light rained down in uneven patches through small holes in the ceiling and walls, scattered about haphazardly. Wind whistled through the holes and I wished for my jacket, wondering where it had gone. Especially wondering where its <em> contents </em> had gone. </p><p>“Where the hell are we?” Bellamy stood up, looking around. </p><p>Octavia backed against a wall and felt behind her frantically, “My sword’s gone.” </p><p>“Guns, too,” Jasper announced. </p><p>I sighed, “They took my whole damn jacket and I honestly don’t blame them.” </p><p>Clarke reached into her jacket, carefully pulling out the box containing the flame to check it was still there. Luckily, it was. Octavia banged against the walls repeatedly, trying to find a way out. I took Jasper’s outstretched hand to help me to my feet and pressed my face against the wall, finding a hole big enough for my eye to look through. I gasped, this didn’t look too good. I grabbed Jasper and pulled him towards the hole. </p><p>“Hey! What are you—” he cut himself short as he looked through the hole. “Holy crap.” </p><p>The vast blue extended for miles and miles and although it was pretty cool, <em> we were very much screwed. </em> We were somewhere in the middle of the fucking ocean.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Luna Kom Floukru</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Hey A.L.I.E, if you can hear me, go float yourself!"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The wide doors opened, blinding us with the light they created as a woman walked into the crate. <em> Luna. </em> We moved towards her, but she only looked at the empty space. “Where’s Lincoln?” she asked.</p><p>“Lincoln is dead,” Octavia replied, and Luna’s face fell. </p><p>Clarke went straight to business, “Lincoln said that you would help us.” </p><p>“Did he?” she raised an eyebrow. </p><p>“Luna. You’re the last of your kind, the last nightblood,” Clarke began. </p><p>Luna looked away, “So Lexa’s dead as well.” </p><p>“Her spirit has chosen you to become the next Commander,” she continued. “Titus entrusted me with the flame to give to you.”</p><p>“Then he should have told you that I left my conclave, swearing to never kill again,” she replied matter-of-factly. </p><p>Clarke took a deep breath, “You don’t have to kill, to lead is your birthright, how you lead is your choice. Here,” she pulled out the flame. </p><p>“I recognise the sacred symbol,” Luna inspected it. “But what is that?” </p><p>“This is the flame,” Clarke explained. “It holds the spirits of the Commanders, of Lexa. Will you take it and become the next Commander?”</p><p>Luna folded Clarke’s fingers back over the device, turning away. “No.” </p><p>We followed her out as Clarke called after her, “Hey! Wait!” </p><p>It was then when I confirmed that we were definitely in the middle of the ocean. Luna’s village was on an oil rig. </p><p>~</p><p>Luna’s guards led us to an area where we could sit and wait. A girl from Floukru was telling a vibrant story about a shark attack of some sort, and everyone who was listening provided background noise. Instead of sitting on the small crates that littered the area, I leant with my back against one and drew my good knee up to my chest, sighing. I was thankful that I had put my MP3 in my trouser pocket and not my jacket, which meant that they hadn’t taken it when we came in. I slid the earbuds in and pressed play, closing my eyes. I laughed, opening my eyes briefly to note the name of the song, <em> Black Water </em> by Of Monsters and Men. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> I need nothing </em>
</p><p>
  <em> To travel the sea </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I need nothing </em>
</p><p>
  <em> I need nothing </em>
</p><p> </p><p>The quiet guitar was soothing and even though I’d spent god knows how long drugged and unconscious, I felt myself drifting off into sleep. </p><p>I couldn’t help but find it annoying that every time I managed to get over my past and my fears, someone manages to show up and mess it all up. It happened on the day trip when I hallucinated Henry, it happened when he showed up at the Ark, it happened when Astrid walked out, and it happened when A.L.I.E decided to fuck with my head. </p><p>Which is why when I fell asleep this time, I awoke with a start an hour later, gasping for breath and cursing. The phrase “swearing like a sailor” came to mind, which was ironic, considering we were actually in the middle of the ocean. I pressed my head into the palms of my hands and groaned when I realised where I was. I pinched the bridge of my nose and something fell forward next to me. I noticed that it was a blanket, and someone must have put it around my shoulders while I was asleep, probably to make up for the fact that my jacket had mysteriously disappeared along with the rest of our weapons. </p><p>I looked up, my eyes falling on everyone in the room individually until I got to Jasper. He shot me a small smile when we locked eyes, before turning back to the girl he was with. For the first time in a long time, he seemed to be finally happy. </p><p>Stretching, I leant on the crate and pulled myself to my feet. Despite searching the main area, I still couldn’t find any of the others apart from Jasper, and I really didn’t want to interrupt his conversation. I doubled back and tried another corridor, following it until it opened out onto another level. Looking around, I leant over a barrier at the side to see if I could spot them. </p><p>I didn’t spot Bellamy, Clarke, and Octavia, but I did see Luna and an unconscious Jasper. Cursing, I realised exactly how much of a bad idea it was to try and do this without weapons, but having no exact idea where the others where I was forced to act fast. I set off quickly, going down the stairs as fast as my leg could handle. It might have been possible to cut them off, but not at the speed I was going at. Without any weapons, I grabbed the first thing I spotted as I walked through the main area, cutting my route in half. The small cup weighed heavily in my hand, not too heavy, but heavy enough to cause a little damage. I tried to catch up to them but it was no use, so I tried the next best thing. How much different was a metal cup to a knife? I hurled it at the man carrying Jasper and it hit him square in the back of the head. Unfortunately, it had little effect on him, other than making the tall man <em> very </em> angry. </p><p>He handed my unconscious friend over to another man next to him and stormed towards me. The man threw a punch and I ducked, but the weight of the brace on my leg unbalanced me and I had to grab the railing on the side of the walkway to stay on my feet. I tried to punch him but he grabbed my arm and hit me in the chest, causing me to double over in pain. I punched him again and this time it hit him square in the face, but he barely flinched and hit me again, knocking me unconscious. </p><p>When I woke up, my arms were tied either side of a metal post, locking me in place. If only I had a knife, then I’d be able to cut myself free, but <em> no</em>, Luna had to take <em>all</em> of my weapons. Jasper hung limply next to me, only just coming to. </p><p>“Jasper,” I hissed. “Jasper!” I tapped him on the leg and he groaned, shaking his head like a kid unwilling to get out of their bed before school. </p><p>“Alyssa?” was the first thing he said, soon followed by “What the hell are you doing here?” </p><p>There was another person tied next to us, but I could tell they were close to Luna because as I watched them lay her on the table, laying a cloth over her face and pouring water over it, he went practically feral trying to get to her. </p><p>She screamed between the torture, “Why are you doing this?” </p><p>“Take the key and this will end,” the tall man replied. </p><p>Luna looked at him with pure horror, “What’s happened to you?” </p><p>“He’s not himself,” Jasper explained, “It’s the chip in his hand.” </p><p>“It puts this psycho computer bitch in your head and she has a habit of telling people what to do,” I added. “Hey A.L.I.E, if you can hear me go float yourself!” Luna struggled, gasping for air before the cloth was placed over her face again. The man closest to us punched Jasper in the stomach and he would have doubled over in pain had his hands not been tied above his head. “Leave him alone!” I shouted, putting all of my weight on the rope around my hands to lift my body upwards and allow me to plant the full force of my good leg on the man’s chest, sending him back a few steps. </p><p>I received a punch in the chest for my efforts, but it was worth it if it stopped him from hitting Jasper for a short amount of time. </p><p>“I cannot take it!” Luna’s friend whispered, “If you stop, I’ll do it. I’ll do it. It’s okay.” </p><p>One of the men came over with the chip, and I threw myself forwards, headbutting it out of his hand before turning to Luna’s friend. “Trust me, you’re not helping her by taking it. If you do swallow that chip then it’ll most likely be you torturing her too, don’t do it.” </p><p>The man punched me again and Luna shouted out, “Derrick!” </p><p>I looked at him, “Derrick, don’t do it.” </p><p>The other man returned to Luna’s torture, pulling her up from the table only to stick her head straight in a bucket of water, pulling her out only so she didn’t drown. They still needed her. When they pulled her out of the water a third time, Derrick was forced to concede, taking the chip as one of the other men released him from the ropes. The door swung open and a man brought in a small child. I tried pulling on the ropes but they were too tight, and the material was so coarse I’d probably end up slicing my wrist open before I managed to pull my hands free. </p><p>“Take it, and the child will be fine,” the man with Luna pulled her back by her hair and held the key in front of her face while the man with the child held a knife to the girl’s throat. </p><p>“Luna…” the girl whimpered, too scared to move. </p><p>I growled, “Get the hell away from her!” </p><p>Instead of taking the key, Luna bit the man offering it’s wrist and grabbed his knife, throwing it and hitting the man holding the girl right in the middle of his forehead, sending him to the ground dead. She used the knife to slice through two of the other chipped men, breathing heavily as the last one rounded on her— <em> Derrick. </em> </p><p>“Please, Derrick— this isn’t you— don’t make me—” tears welled in Luna’s eyes as he lunged for her, giving her no choice but to stab the knife straight into his chest and holding him as he sank to the ground. “Oh no, I’m so sorry,” she whispered, sobbing loudly as he took his final breath. “I’m so sorry…” </p><p>Bellamy comforted the girl and reassured her as Octavia cut the ties around me and Jasper. </p><p>“I’m fine,” Jasper told her, “They didn’t break me.”  </p><p>“Neither,” I said, flexing my wrists and ignoring the rings around them where they had practically been rubbed raw. </p><p>“Where’s Shay?” he asked Octavia with concern. </p><p>She looked down, shaking her head, “I’m sorry.” </p><p>“It’s what we do,” he replied. “It’s what we do.” </p><p>After Luna had prepared for the funeral for the people who died chipped, Clarke was convinced that she’d agree to the ascension. I doubted it, but I went with them as they hovered at the side for Luna to come over.</p><p>“Anyone could be chipped and we wouldn’t know it,” Jasper remarked casually.</p><p>“If they are, they’ll act before we put the flame in Luna. Stay sharp,” Clarke replied. </p><p>Jasper seemed surprised, “She changed her mind?” But he didn’t get an answer as Luna arrived, bringing with her another girl who held out a tray of drinks. I didn’t grab one at first but she was very convincing and I ended up taking one anyway. </p><p>“I’m sorry,” Clarke said truthfully to Luna, “But now you see what we’re facing. An enemy that will do anything to win. She won’t stop until she has everyone.” </p><p>Luna looked down at the flame in her hand, “People I love died today. Needlessly, at my hand. I can’t let that happen again.” She raised her hand and turned to the crowd. “As we prepare to give our brothers and sister to the sea, we honour their lives. <em> From water we are born, to water we return.” </em> </p><p>The crowd echoed her words in Trig, finishing their drinks afterwards. I held mine up to my lips, it smelt funny, but I supposed it’d be rude not to so I drank it down anyway. </p><p>Clarke was persistent, “If we’re gonna do this, we have to hurry. A.L.I.E will send reinforcements, and we have to find someplace private to perform the ascension.”</p><p>“You believe that to defeat an enemy that will stop at nothing, <em> you </em> must stop at nothing. How is that different than ‘blood must have blood’?” Luna asked. </p><p>Octavia raised her hand, “Wait a second, Luna you can’t just—” she cut herself off, falling to the ground. My eyes widened but before I could do anything, my legs gave way and I fell to the floor too, my eyes shutting before I hit the ground. </p><p>~</p><p>When I finally came to, there was dirt below me and the sound of waves in my ears as she crashed against the shore further down the beach. Bellamy was already awake, standing up with his gun and keeping watch, and I noticed my jacket had been draped over me so the minute I got to my feet I pulled it on, relieved to find that all my weapons were where I had left them. </p><p>Clarke regained consciousness next to me, sitting up and getting to her feet after she checked the case in her hand for the flame, sighing gratefully when she noticed that it was in there. I held out a hand and pulled Jasper upright, turning around to find that Octavia was standing up as well. We walked towards the edge of the headland, looking out at the sea towards the direction Luna’s rig must be.</p><p>“What now?”</p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Oop this chapter is shorter than I anticipated.</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Polis</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"You one of the good guys now?"</p><p>"No, I'm just not one of the bad guys." </p><p>"Doesn't that make you one of the good guys?"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Bellamy finished checking the solar panel on the rovel before jumping down from the vehicle. “Rover’s almost charged. We need to pack up, we’ll be home soon.” </p><p>“Then what?” Clarke asked, “Run away?” </p><p>“We’re not running away, Clarke. We need to regroup with the others, and find another way to defeat—” </p><p>She cut Bellamy off, “There is no other way. We need to find a nightblood. We need to unlock the flame. It’s the only way to stop A.L.I.E.” </p><p>“What do you expect us to do, Clarke? Walk into random villages asking for their nightbloods?” Jasper laughed. </p><p>Clarke sighed, “If that’s what it takes.” </p><p>“If A.L.I.E can find us on Luna’s rig, she can find us anywhere. It’s too dangerous to go village to village, it’s not fair on the people who live there. A.L.I.E will destroy them,” I shook my head and Octavia agreed with me. </p><p>She looked at me, “If we don’t find a nightblood, there won’t be any Grounder villages,” before turning to Bellamy, “Or a home for us to go back to.” </p><p>“That’s all the more reason we go there and make sure our friends are okay,” he answered sternly, refusing to back down. </p><p>Clarke nodded and walked off into the woods, prompting a sigh from Octavia. </p><p>“She’ll be fine,” Jasper shrugged, “Just let her cool off.” I continued watching the gap between the trees where Clarke had disappeared into, and he sighed. “You just can’t leave it alone, can you?” </p><p>“Unfortunately, no,” I called to him, setting off after her. </p><p>I walked between the trees, looking around for a sign indicating where she had gone. A large thud from my right told me that it was somewhere that way. I crept along slowly, hiding behind the trees to not be spotted. </p><p>“You have a real gratitude problem, you know that?” A voice I didn’t recognise announced. </p><p>“Would you just hear me out? I need to find a nightblood to put that in,” Clarke tried to explain as I pressed myself harder against the tree to stay out of sight. </p><p>“I already have a nightblood to put it in,” the other person replied.</p><p>Clarke followed him, “Please just stop.” </p><p>“Because of you, Ontari never ascended. So no, I won’t stop, not until the Ice Nation has its Commander,” he snapped back. </p><p>I stepped out from behind the tree, levelling my gun at him, “You were saying? Scooch back a little, that’s my friend you’re talking to right there. And toss the bow while you’re at it,” I ordered. “You okay?” I asked Clarke, who nodded in response. “Who the hell is this?” </p><p>“Roan. King of Azgeda,” Clarke replied. </p><p>I laughed, “Oh shit, you’re serious?”</p><p>Bellamy appeared behind me, aiming his gun at Roan too. “Hands where I can see them, let’s go.” </p><p>“He’s coming with us,” Clarke decided. </p><p>Bellamy scoffed, “The hell he is.” </p><p>“Why would I do that?” Roan looked at her weirdly. </p><p>“Because we both want the same thing— to put the flame in Ontari,” she replied. </p><p>I eyed Roan suspiciously, “How do you know he’s not chipped?” </p><p>“If he were, do you think he would have saved me?” </p><p>“Still, we need to be sure,” Bellamy pulled the trigger and the bullet tore through Roan’s arm, causing him to cry out in pain before he was knocked unconscious. “Now we’re sure.” </p><p>I sighed, “He’s going to be <em> pissed </em> when he wakes up.” </p><p>~</p><p>The rover pulled into the garage and we climbed out of the back. Raven limped over, “We were getting worried… where’s Luna?” </p><p>“Luna said <em> no</em>,” Octavia replied harshly. </p><p>“Who the hell is this guy?” Harper glared at Roan, whose hands were now bound in front of him. I was right, he <em> had </em> been pissed when he woke up, and if we hadn’t tied him up beforehand he could’ve caused some serious damage, according to Clarke. </p><p>Bryan eyed him warily, “He’s Ice Nation.” </p><p>“King of the Ice Nation, actually,” I pulled a face. </p><p>“And he’s our way into Polis,” Clarke explained. </p><p>Bellamy nudged him forward, “Let’s go, your highness. You two, on me. We’ll take him to lockup.” </p><p>Raven watched them leave before turning to Clarke, “You want to use him to get to Ontari.” </p><p>“Yes,” Clarke nodded. </p><p>“What happened to his arm?” Harper asked. </p><p>Jasper shrugged, “Bellamy shot him.” </p><p>Monty rolled his eyes, “Good luck getting him to cooperate then.” </p><p>I pulled a face, “I mean, last time they were in the same room together he stabbed Bellamy, so I’d say they’re about even now.” </p><p>~</p><p>Once the plan was in place, we began to stock the rover. Miller grabbed a box of small grenade-like objects. “Knockout gas, Mount Weather’s finest,” he whistled. “As soon as they bring Ontari out, we put them to sleep.” </p><p>“Because she’s chipped, you’re going to have to EMP her like you did me before you give her the flame,” Raven advised, “Made a few improvements,” she handed over the device. </p><p>“All of which won’t matter if you can’t get access to A.L.I.E’s code,” Clarke replied. </p><p>Raven smiled at her, “You worry about the nightblood, I’ll worry about A.L.I.E.” </p><p>“How can you access code that doesn’t exist here anymore?” Jasper asked, putting his hands in his pockets. </p><p>“We’ve got a plan,” Monty assured him. </p><p>Octavia walked in, Roan just behind her. “What are we waiting for?”</p><p>“Let’s move out,” Bellamy called out, and we began our goodbyes. </p><p>Each of us hugged individually and I was last into the rover, sticking my head out and giving the others a small salute before shutting the door behind me, “May we meet again.” </p><p>It wasn’t as long a drive as I thought to Polis, but we were stopping just outside so that we could move in undetected. Clarke got out first and I pushed open the back doors so that the rest of us could follow. </p><p>“Right, this is where we split up.” Roan ordered, “The entrance to the tunnels is right over there.” He pointed into the bushes. </p><p>“We know where the tunnels are,” Bellamy snapped back, clearly still not trusting him. </p><p>Roan held out his hand, “I’m gonna need the flame. Look, this only works if we send Ontari out to get it. If they don’t see it, they won’t do that. Not much of a trap without the bait,” he finished sarcastically. </p><p>Reluctantly, Clarke handed him the box. “Fine, but I’m coming with you.” </p><p>“No way. That is not the plan,” Bellamy disagreed. </p><p>“It is now,” Clarke decided. “I’m not letting that out of my sight, and I’m the only one who knows the passphrase, so you can tell them that without me, Ontari <em> can’t </em> ascend.” </p><p>Roan sighed, “You’ll need to look like my prisoner.” </p><p>“Ok,” she agreed. </p><p>“Wait a second,” Bellamy objected, “Give us a minute.” He took her to the side for what I guessed was some quick speech about how she shouldn’t trust Roan and this could all go very badly. Judging by the look on her face, her mind was made up and that wouldn’t change anything. </p><p>I gave them a minute or two before walking over, “So you’re really going to do this?” I asked. </p><p>She nodded, “I have to.” </p><p>“In that case…” I rifled around in my jacket, “Take this, this… and this.” I handed her three knives. “Put one up your sleeve, one in your boot, and one in the back of your jacket.” </p><p>Clarke smiled, “Thanks, but are you sure you’ve still got enough?” </p><p>“Believe me, I’ve got <em> several </em> left,” I laughed. “We’ve got your back. Always.”</p><p>Bellamy led the way through the tunnels and our small group got into position, throwing our bags down before trying to move the grates enough to stick our guns through. I got into position, tracking the gate through the scope and waiting for Clarke and Roan to appear. </p><p>Bryan pulled out his gun, “Are we ever gonna stop fighting?” </p><p>“Hell yeah,” Miller reassured him. “We’re gonna build a house on a lake… and you’re gonna plant corn,” he laughed. </p><p>“And raise chickens,” Bryan added. </p><p>“Yeah, and grow old,” Miller smiled at him. </p><p>I shared a look with Bellamy and I could tell we were thinking the same thing. We’ll all be lucky to make it out of this alive. </p><p>Bellamy nudged me, “Eleven o’clock, Roan will signal when he sees Ontari. We wait until she’s standing in front of them, and then we launch the gas.”</p><p>“They’re gonna be holding their breath, so we gotta move fast,” Bryan reminded us. </p><p>“Anyone who gets in our way, we use nonlethal force,” Bellamy announced, looking straight at me. </p><p>I sighed, “Okay, okay. But you know that’s my least favourite type of force.” </p><p>“These people are not the enemy, they’re being controlled, the only thing we’re here to kill is A.L.I.E, is that clear?” he reminded me. </p><p>“I know, I know. Nonlethal. Got it.” I watched through the scope as Roan brought Clarke forward and wondered where the thousands of people were. The streets were empty, but A.L.I.E definitely had more followers than this, so where the hell were they?</p><p>Roan produced the flame and the chipped people who were there rose to their feet, watching him. They didn’t move, but they stood there watching and waiting and it set me on edge. A familiar figure appeared from the other side, “Jaha?” I asked, shocked. </p><p>“What the hell is he doing here?” Octavia frowned. </p><p>Miller looked up, “You see Ontari?” </p><p>“No. Hold,” Bellamy told him. We kept watching, but Roan’s fist closed around the flame, hiding it from view, and Clarke’s eyes darted once in our direction. “Something’s wrong,” Bellamy noticed. </p><p>I tried to read their lips and my eyes went wide, pulling away from the grate. “Your friends in the tunnel can’t help you,” Jaha had said. </p><p>“They know we’re here,” I hissed. “It’s a trap,” I turned around only to be punched in the gut from one of the members of the guard. </p><p>“On your knees! Drop your weapons!” The intruders shouted, turning us around and pressing us against the wall to bind our hands. I elbowed backwards, trying to hit something but my arm was bent at an unnatural angle and I winced in pain. </p><p>We waited, guards watching over us, until one of the soldiers stood upright and turned to the man next to him. “Let’s go. She wants Bellamy.” </p><p>They hauled him to his feet and Octavia screamed, earning herself a kick to the stomach. I tried to stand up, but the position they had sat me in was too awkward for it to be possible. “Where are you taking him?” I called, struggling, but that only got me given a punch in the face. </p><p>“Leave them alone!” He told them, “It’s okay. It’s okay,” Bellamy reassured us as they led him away. </p><p>
  <em>Nonlethal my ass, shit’s about to get ugly. </em>
</p><p>Before I had a chance to act, I heard a familiar voice from the other end of the hall. “If I were you, I’d hit the deck,” Murphy advised. </p><p>“Murphy?” Bellamy asked, surprised, before shouting, “Everyone hit the ground!” He broke free and threw himself down. I did the same as on either side of Murphy, Pike and Indra open fired. </p><p>“More will come, we have to hurry,” Indra covered the exit while Murphy untied us. He came over to me, pulling the rope off from around my wrists. “Hey, stranger.” </p><p>I raised an eyebrow, “You one of the good guys now?” </p><p>“No,” he scoffed, “I’m just not one of the bad guys.” </p><p>“Doesn’t that make you one of the good guys?” I laughed. “Where the hell have you been?” </p><p>“Luckily for you, <em> not </em> the City of Light,” he replied, moving on to help Miller up. “Nathan… you’ve looked better,” he held out a hand.</p><p>Miller laughed, “You haven’t,” groaning as he accepted the hand which pulled him to his feet. </p><p>“Got a knife I can borrow?” Murphy called to me.</p><p>“<em>Several</em>, but take this one,” I handed him the one strapped to my thigh. </p><p>Octavia’s eyes were fixed on Pike even as Indra helped her up, “You’re with <em> Pike </em>?” she asked incredulously. </p><p>“Only way we get out of here is together,” Indra replied. </p><p>“He killed Lincoln,” she told Indra. “Put him on his needs. Shot him in the head.” </p><p>Bellamy sighed, “O. Indra’s right, we need every fighter we can get.” </p><p>Murphy picked up a bag, “You guys miss the part where it’s time to go?” </p><p>“We’re not leaving,” I told him. </p><p>He sighed, “We just saved your lives, why do I think I’m gonna regret that?”</p><p>“Clarke is in trouble,” Bellamy explained to him. </p><p>Murphy rolled his eyes, “Clarke’s <em> always </em> in trouble.” </p><p><em>He’s not wrong</em>, I thought. “They took her and the flame to the tower. We need to help her if we want to finish off that AI bitch once and for all.”</p><p>“Everything we need to stop A.L.I.E is in the same place,” Bellamy spoke up. </p><p>Octavia hesitated, “If we go up that tower, we won’t be able to fight our way down again.” </p><p>“If we stop A.L.I.E, we won’t have to,” he replied. </p><p>Murphy looked back to Pike who nodded, leaning forward and giving Bellamy his pistol. Murphy sighed, “Up the tower. Great.” He paused, “You know, after this… doing the right thing can kiss my ass.” </p><p>I laughed, shaking my head as we began to slowly make our way towards the elevator. It was a miracle the guards on duty hadn’t heard all the commotion. Bellamy slowly sneaked out from behind the corner, walking lightly so that they wouldn’t hear, but Pike simply stepped out and shot them both. </p><p>“Hey! I told you, that is <em> not </em> how we’re doing this,” Bellamy rounded on him. </p><p>“They were in our way,” Pike said nonchalantly. </p><p>I turned around to Pike, tapping my gun against the back of his head, “Pull that shit again and you’re going to regret not killing me on the battlefield when you had the chance, got it?” </p><p>“You can’t kill him,” Bellamy warned, “We need the manpower.” </p><p>I laughed, “Oh I wasn’t planning on killing him… I just read somewhere that a man can run half a mile with no genitals, and every time Pike appears I have a strong urge to test that theory.” </p><p>Murphy glanced at me out of the corner of his eye, “That’s a weird thing to know off the top of your head.” </p><p>“What? You think my dad had regular books?” I scoffed, “Please.”</p><p>Bellamy glared at me, “You’re not shooting and/or cutting Pike’s dick off.” </p><p>“Not yet,” I shrugged, walking past him and towards the elevator. </p><p>“These people are controlled by A.L.I.E. They are not our enemy, and we can still save them,” Bellamy reminded us.</p><p>Miller sighed, “Yeah, but there’s going to be a lot more of these people if we don’t move. Let’s do this.” </p><p>“I’ll bring it down,” Indra announced, moving towards the lever for the elevator. </p><p>“Once we’re up, you blow the elevator and then climb,” Bellamy ordered. </p><p>Bryan nodded, “Destroy the ladder behind us, got it.” </p><p>“Come on, you do realise we don’t have a way down, right?” Murphy asked, glancing down the corridor. </p><p>I shrugged, “A problem for another day. Let’s go, our ride’s here.” </p><p>Murphy pulled open the doors and I walked in, Bellamy coming in last. He paused, turning around. “O, you coming?” </p><p>“If anything goes wrong down here, they’ll need my help,” she decided. “We got this.” </p><p>“Be careful, don’t die,” I told her. “May we meet again.” </p><p>“May we meet again,” she whispered back as the doors shut. </p><p>I looked around, “So what’s the plan? They’ll be expecting us.” </p><p>Murphy sighed, “You get that we’re screwed, right?” </p><p>“This plan is going to work,” Bellamy replied, frowning at him, “Why are you here?”</p><p>“I’m just trying to survive,” Murphy shrugged, before finally admitting. “You’re not the only one here trying to save someone you care about.”</p><p>The elevator shuddered to a halt and I froze, “Well that’s not good…” </p><p>“There has to be trouble down below,” Bellamy realised. The doors began to slowly open as people on the other side tried to get in. They managed to pry the door open and Murphy pulled out the shock baton, sticking it through the door to push them away. </p><p>One of the chipped Grounders grabbed Bellamy, pulling him through the hole but I grabbed him as Murphy used the baton to pull him back inside once they released him. Bellamy held onto the top of the door, swinging through and kicking the next approaching person. </p><p>Someone else opened the doors and stood in the way, punching Bellamy in the stomach and trying to get in. Murphy zapped them while I tried to pull the doors shut, to no avail. The elevator shook and began to move again and Bellamy kicked someone out as I tried to pry one of the chipped zombies off Murphy. “Back off! This elevator is taken, you’re going—” I kicked him— “to have to—” another kick “get— the— next one!” </p><p>The man jumped off him, pinning me against the wall with his hands on my throat. Murphy charged at him, but got repeatedly punched in the stomach as a result, “Shoot him! Shoot him, Bellamy!” The gunshot echoed in the small elevator as the man’s blood splattered the wall behind us. I breathed slowly, sucking the air into my lungs.</p><p>Murphy groaned, falling to the floor. Bellamy held out a hand to him to help him up and he thanked him, following it with “What now?”</p><p>I smirked, “I have an idea, but you’re going to have to take a leaf out of my book.” </p><p>“I’m not going to like this, am I?” Murphy muttered. </p><p>“Trust me,” I sighed, “And open that hatch.” He obliged and under my instructions climbed through, holding out a hand to pull me as Bellamy gave me a leg up before climbing after. </p><p>“Let me guess,” Bellamy asked, “Dramatic entrance?”</p><p>You’ll see the appeal once we do it,” I nodded. “It’s very satisfying.” </p><p>He shut the hatch behind us and I pulled out one of the Mount Weather gas canisters. “When they come in, we drop it.” The elevator stalled and I realised that we had arrived. I heard men opening the doors just below us, puzzled when they realised we weren’t inside. </p><p><em>“Where did they go?” </em> One asked another in trig, stepping in and looking around. <em> “Stay here,” </em> he said to the other man. Bellamy nodded at me and I dropped the canister, grabbing a mask. Once they were both out, Murphy pulled on a gas mask and swung down, catching me and setting me down next to him so that Bellamy could slide out after us, also wearing a mask. </p><p>Murphy tapped me on the shoulder, pulling Bellamy after him, “Throne room’s this way.” </p><p>Once we were out of range of the gas, all three of us pulled our masks off and raised our weapons once more, bursting through the door. </p><p>“Stop him!” Clarke shouted, pointing at Jaha. Bellamy tackled him, while Murphy and I ran towards Abby, who was swinging from a noose on the other side of the room. Murphy put a box down for me to stand on, holding Abby up to relieve the pressure while I got to work on slicing the rope. She dropped like a stone, hitting the ground with a thud. I hopped down, rolling her over and checking her pulse. Murphy pulled the rope from around her neck and called to Clarke, “It’s okay, she’s breathing.” </p><p>“Jaha has the flame, get it,” Clarke shouted to Bellamy, who ran and tried to get it from him. “We can’t let Ontari die, we have to stop the bleeding,” she ordered. “Her pulse is weak. Here, hold this to the wound,” she told Murphy, handing him a cloth. </p><p>“What are you gonna do?” He asked, putting pressure on the wound. </p><p>“I need a flashlight,” Clarke looked around and I pulled one out of my jacket.</p><p>Bellamy appeared with the flame, “First we take out the chip, then we put in the flame.” </p><p>Clarke shone the light into Ontari’s eyes, “Her pupils are unresponsive.” </p><p>“What? What does that mean?” Bellamy asked worriedly. </p><p>“She’s brain dead,” Clarke explained. “She can’t give us the kill code.” </p><p>“Dammit! There has to be another way,” I cursed looking around.</p><p>Murphy took a deep breath, “We’re trapped here.”</p>
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<a name="section0015"><h2>15. The City of Light</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>"Just another day on the ground, right?"</p><p>"All this? Just a bloody average Tuesday for us lot, isn't it?"</p>
          </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“What now?” I asked Clarke as the others moved the unconscious chipped people to one of the bedrooms. “Too bad we can’t make one of us a nightblood. I mean, Becca knew how.” </p><p>Clarke paused, “Maybe we can, but we’ll need help,” her eyes strayed towards her mom. Raven’s new version of the device had a built-in tube for extracting the remaining chip goop afterwards. Clarke pulled Abby into her lap and waited for her to wake up, “Mom? I know you’re in there… come back to me. I need you.” </p><p>“Clarke,” she whispered. </p><p>“You’re okay, you’re okay,” she helped her into a sitting position, where Abby promptly began to sob. </p><p>“I’m sorry…” she covered her mouth in shock as she looked at the two wounds she had made on Clarke’s upper body while torturing her. “I’m so sorry…” </p><p>“It’s okay, It’s okay,” Clarke reassured her, pulling her in for a hug with tears of her own. “Mom, it wasn’t you.” The others burst back in, guns raised at Abby but Clarke stepped in front of her, “It’s okay, she’s back. I used the EMP.” </p><p>Murphy glanced at her, his eyes flitting between Clarke and Ontari, “What about Ontari? I thought you only had one shot with that thing.” </p><p>“Ontari’s brain dead, she’s not an option for the flame anymore.” Clarke paused, “Are the others secure?” </p><p>Bellamy nodded, “For now. Jaha and the guards are tied up in a bedroom.” </p><p>Pike added, “We took out the elevator and the ladder as we climbed, the stairs are collapsed. No one’s following us.” </p><p>“Good, then we have time,” Clarke nodded. </p><p>Murphy frowned, “Ascension? You just said Ontari wasn’t an option. Besides, we no longer have an EMP.”</p><p>“We’re not putting the flame in Ontari’s head,” Clarke explained. “We’re putting it in mine.” </p><p>Everyone’s heads turned towards Clarke in surprise and Bellamy stepped forwards cautiously, “Clarke, that thing killed Emerson in seconds, liquefied his brain.”</p><p>“Emerson wasn’t connected to a nightblood,” she replied. </p><p>Pike’s brows furrowed, “Transfusion?” </p><p>“Not exactly,” Clarke answered.</p><p>Abby tried to stand up and I held out a hand to pull her to her feet. “Connected like Mount Weather,” she finished. </p><p>“Yes,” Clarke nodded, “Everything we need is in your medkit.” </p><p>“No. It’s too dangerous, and there are too many variables,” Abby walked towards her daughter. </p><p>Clarke sighed, “But no options.” </p><p>“She has a point,” I cut in. “Plus, when have any of us ever tried to talk Clarke out of anything and <em> succeeded </em>?” </p><p>Octavia rushed in, “Whatever you’re doing, you better do it fast.” </p><p>“Why? What happened?” Bellamy asked her.</p><p>“They’re climbing.” </p><p>I rushed to the balcony with him, leaning over and looking around. They were shouting and climbing ladders to get themselves up to the main body of the building, before climbing the brickwork with expert technique. </p><p>“I have to do this,” Clarke pleaded.</p><p>Abby nodded, “Okay, I’ll help you.” </p><p>I looked down the side of the building as they walked back inside to prepare, “What if we managed to slow them down?”</p><p>“How?” Miller asked.</p><p>“Drop a canister of gas down there. Not onto the people climbing, because you know, they’ll fall to their deaths. But the people <em> arriving </em> so that they’re down before they even get there?” </p><p>“Good plan,” he pulled out a canister and set it off, dropping it into the crowd. Some of them dropped, some of them climbed a foot from the bottom and then dropped, but it didn’t do that much overall. </p><p>Someone had the idea to grease the holds towards the top with lamp oil, and there was enough for every room except the Commander’s chambers, so that was where the fight was going to be starting. In a few minutes, I would join them, but I think both Bellamy and I wanted to make sure that Clarke started off okay before we joined the war. </p><p>“You good?” I whispered to her.</p><p>“I will be, once we defeat A.L.I.E,” Clarke breathed. </p><p>Bellamy smiled, “Hey, try doing that hanging upside down.” He received a half-smile for his half-joke. </p><p>“Be careful, don’t die,” I told her. </p><p>“This will work,” she reassured me. </p><p>Abby paused, watching the blood flow through the tube. “And if it doesn’t?” </p><p>“If it doesn’t work, then she dies. If she doesn’t try, she dies with the rest of us when the climbers get here. If we’re gonna do this, I need the flame,” Murphy announced. </p><p>I scoffed, “There’s some of that John Murphy optimism I’ve been missing.” </p><p>“You missed me?” He laughed, “That’s cute.” </p><p>“Shut up,” I rolled my eyes.</p><p>Abby hesitated, but Clarke took the flame from her and gave it to Murphy, “He knows what he’s doing. You have to let me go,” she told her. </p><p>“Right, lean forward,” Murphy ordered and Clarke tilted her head forward, grabbing my hand with one hand and grabbing Bellamy’s with the other. “Ascende superius,” he whispered and tiny tentacles sprouted from the device. </p><p>“Holy shit…” My eyes went wide as he brought it closer and closer to Clarke’s neck, before letting it burrow inside. </p><p>Clarke began to scream, shaking and squirming and squeezing my hand so tight I thought she might break my fingers, but not that I’d mind if it was what got her through. She went limp, her eyes shut as she fell back against the chair. </p><p>“No no no no no…” Abby cursed, checking her pulse. </p><p>“What’s happening? Is she okay?” Bellamy asked worriedly. </p><p>“Her heart’s racing,” she explained. “Get that thing out of her head.” When Murphy didn’t move, she raised her voice. “I said, get that thing out of her head.” </p><p>“No… no…” Clarke came to, slowly. “Not yet.” </p><p>“Are you in any pain?” Abby held her daughter’s face. </p><p>Clarke shook her head, “No. I’m okay. And I know how to stop A.L.I.E. I have to take the chip.” </p><p>“What?” Bellamy’s eyes widened. </p><p>“I have to go into the city of light and find the kill switch,” she explained. </p><p>Murphy scoffed, “Yeah, that sounds like a great idea.” </p><p>“Clarke, listen to me. A.L.I.E wants the flame. If you take the chip, you’re giving it to her. The second someone sees you, she’s going to know you’re there,” Abby warned her. “She’ll kill you. If your mind dies, you die.”</p><p>“Not necessarily,” I thought. “Becca was smart. There might be some sort of failsafe in there so that she can go undetected. That, and as long as Clarke stays a nightblood, she has a combination of the chip <em> and </em> the flame, so that should protect her.” </p><p>“The flame will protect me,” Clarke confirmed. “I don’t know how I know, I just know.” </p><p>“I believe you,” Bellamy nodded. </p><p>Abby kissed Clarke on the forehead, “Do you even know what you’re looking for?”</p><p>“I will when I find it.” </p><p>Bellamy came over, holding out a chip. “We’ll keep you safe on the outside.” </p><p>I nodded, “We always do.” </p><p>Clarke took the chip and closed her eyes, and I knew she had woken up in the city of light. </p><p>Bellamy nodded to me and we began to make our way towards the Commander’s chambers. We paused as Miller came out, helping Bryan as he hopped along towards the throne room. Bellamy groaned, “You left her with Pike?” We rushed into the room and Octavia was standing there, watching Pike get beaten to death by some of the first wave of chipped soldiers that had climbed the building. “O! What are you doing?” Bellamy shouted, stepping in front of her. </p><p>“Bellamy no!” She tried to grab him but he raised his gun and shot the three men off Pike, one of which was ended as he snapped their neck.</p><p>“Can you stand?” Bellamy helped him to his feet. </p><p>Pike limped, “She cut me!” </p><p>“Come on! We gotta go!” Bellamy shouted, dragging Pike with him back out the room. </p><p>I stopped, “We can’t give up the room!” </p><p>“We already have,” he replied, slamming the door shut behind us and barricading it with furniture. </p><p>Pike turned to Octavia, “I told you, you need to get yourself under control if we’re going to survive this.” </p><p>We pressed our backs against the barricade, hoping it would hold. Bellamy reached for his sister, “O, O listen to me. I let my need for revenge put me on the wrong side. I don’t want that for you.” He was cut off from saying anything else by a large thud that shook the barricade. </p><p>“They’re throwing themselves at the door on the other side,” I groaned. “We need a plan for when they break through.”</p><p>“You keep it closed,” Octavia decided, “I’ll get more for the barricade.” </p><p>Once she was gone, Pike turned to Bellamy, “It wasn’t the wrong side. If the Grounder army was still there when Lexa died, they would have attacked and you know it.” </p><p>“I wanted to see things like you,” Bellamy told him. “I need that. The belief that they were bad and we were good. I don’t know what to believe anymore. I just know, I have to live with what I’ve done.” He leant against the barricade, trying to hold it down further. </p><p>It was my turn with Pike, and as I spun around to face him my hand cracked across his face like a whip. “Listen here. If you don’t get over yourself, once this war is over I will follow through with <em> all </em> of my previous threats. So much of the bad shit that happened here was because of you, and you need to understand that. You can’t justify it anymore. When you killed that sleeping army you did exactly what you feared they were going to do, you declared war, which made you no better than you believed them to be. The moment you landed on earth, you turned into the exact person you were trying to “save” your people from,” I snapped. </p><p>Octavia came back with more pieces of furniture to barricade the door with and she brought Miller and Bryan with her, each of them carrying more furniture. “This won’t hold for long,” Bellamy warned as Miller took his place so that he could run and get more supplies. </p><p>“How the hell did they get in here?” Miller shouted above the noise of the barricade-breaking attempts coming from the other side of the door. </p><p>“Doesn’t matter,” I replied, pushing against it. </p><p>Bellamy came back, throwing one last chair onto the pile before stepping back, “This is where we make our stand.” </p><p>“Sounds like there’s a lot of them,” Miller shouted. “May be time to go to guns.” </p><p>“We’ve got something better than guns— surprise,” Pike announced, and we followed him around the corner. He flooded the corridor with water, deeper than the average shoe-height, and held up a shock baton. “It’s physics.” </p><p>I frowned, “Weren’t you an earth skills teacher?” </p><p>“Doesn’t matter,” he brushed it off. </p><p>We hid as they finally broke through the door, leaving Octavia standing in the water. “Wait. I give up. I’ll take the chip,” she raised her hands in fake surrender. </p><p>“Good. No one else has to die, ever,” Kane replied calmly. “Maybe you can convince your mentor of that.” </p><p>“Indra’s alive?” Octavia was taken by surprise. </p><p>“Yes, on the cross, suffering needlessly,” he answered. </p><p>“NOW!” Octavia shouted, jumping onto a box to make her higher than the water level. We emerged from behind the corner, turning on the batons and throwing them into the water, shocking all of them at once. </p><p>“Charge is clear. Won’t last long, we need to get their weapons while we still can,” Pike said firmly. </p><p>I nodded, wading in to grab the nearest person and empty them of their weapons, frowning when I reached into a pocket and found something I hadn’t been expecting. “I know this guy. Mecca Station. Why the <em> fuck </em> is he carrying nunchucks?” </p><p>Miller shrugged, “Darryl's always been weird like that.” </p><p>I moved on to the next person, taking their daggers and tossing them away to be picked up all together, and grabbing their guns to put in the throne room out of the way. Some of them began to wake up and I grabbed as many weapons as I could and brought them with me to the throne room. It was now or never. </p><p>“This is it. We need to keep Clarke safe, give her time,” Bellamy ordered, finishing the barricade. “They’re unarmed, but they won’t feel pain. And they won’t stop until they're out cold.” </p><p>“Got it, go for the knockout,” Miller confirmed. </p><p>Begin me, a gun was cocked and I turned around to see Abby holding a pistol. “Only if they get past you,” she explained, cheerfully. </p><p>I raised my weapons as the barricade began to break, the door opening wider and wider and pressing against it. As the first pieces of furniture began to fall, I moved protectively in front of Murphy. Without him doing whatever the hell he was doing inside Ontari’s chest, she’d die. The first wave began to rush through the doors and we leapt into action, trying not to murder them as they attacked us. Someone came for me and I struck them down, keeping them at bay. Bellamy had someone else in a headlock, and I grabbed a random object, throwing it at the attacker coming at him from his blind spot. </p><p>“You good?” I chanced a look back at Murphy, his hand deep in Ontari’s chest, pumping her heart manually. </p><p>“You kidding?” He laughed nervously, “This is a cakewalk.” </p><p>More and more burst through the doors and when all else failed I removed the clip from a nearby gun and threw it at one of the attacker’s foreheads, knowing him to the ground. Someone ran at Clarke but Abby stood in front of her, firing a single shot into their chest. </p><p>Yeah, it didn’t really seem like non-lethal was an option anymore, so I kicked my senses into high gear and ran into the fray. <em> This is why I carry knives</em>, I thought to myself as I pulled one back out of one attacker and plunged it into another. Despite the pain in my leg, I carried on fighting, barging my shoulder into an attacker coming from behind Octavia. Turning around, I saw someone was heading for Murphy and I stuck a knife in the back of their head, calling out a warning so that Murphy could step to the side as the man fell to the ground next to him. </p><p>I looked around, watching Pike smack someone from Octavia. Jaha waltzed through into the room, having someone untied himself from the bedroom he had been restrained in. Pike ran at him, but he got thrown off as Jaha made a beeline for Clarke. “Oh no you don’t,” I muttered, running at him as fast as my leg would allow and jumping, throwing my entire body weight onto his top half, unbalancing his centre of gravity and bringing him to the ground. </p><p>“Emori, no!” Murphy shouted, trying to keep a girl at bay. He turned to me, “Don’t kill her, please.” </p><p>I nodded, abandoning my fight with Jaha and swiping Emori’s legs out from under her, trapping her into a headlock until she fell limp. “I’ve got your back,” I whispered to Murphy before spinning back around and knocking Jackson off his feet before he could get to Abby and Clarke.</p><p>But it was like a switch had been flicked. </p><p>And then it occurred to me, it had. </p><p>All of A.L.I.E’s army collapsed suddenly, feeling the pain of their combined injuries all at once. Jackson looked around in horror and out of the corner of my eye, I saw Murphy try and wipe Ontari’s blood off his hands, squirming awkwardly. Clarke sat back upright, looking at the flame that her mother had placed in her hand before turning to Murphy, “Thank you,” she whispered. </p><p>“Just another day on the ground, right?” He smiled jokingly and I couldn’t help but laugh. </p><p>I gestured around, shrugging, “All this? Just a bloody average Tuesday for us lot, isn’t it?” </p><p>“John…” the girl called Emori began to stir and he wrapped her in a hug as she sobbed, clutching him gratefully. Across the other side of the room, Bryan and Miller were hugging in relief and Abby was making her way over to Kane. Bellamy was leaning against a desk, rubbing a hand around his throat and breathing deeply. He noticed Clarke was awake and moved to help her up from the throne, and as she got to her feet her eyes widened at the scene around us. </p><p>I held out a hand to help Jackson up, “Hey doc, I think I might need a few stitches,” I laughed, wiping a hand across my forehead. </p><p>“Where?” He stood up, brushing himself down and wincing in pain. </p><p>I groaned, “Pretty much everywhere. But I think you should attend to that lot first, I had to stab a few people and they didn’t feel it then, but I’m <em> pretty </em> sure they can feel it now.” </p><p>Looking over, I began to make my way towards Bellamy and Clarke, giving them a relieved smile. “You did it, Clarke. You fucking did it,” I laughed. </p><p>“I did,” she looked at the floor. </p><p>“Hey,” Bellamy looked at her in concern, “You’re not acting like someone who just saved the world.” </p><p>“Because we didn’t… not yet,” she replied.</p><p> </p>
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